I have this problem too. The thing I've noticed about the people that do have focus is that they tend to work strictly 9-6 only. If I have a task to do at 3pm my excuse for distraction is that I'll just work late again or work on the weekend, so I have lots of time. If I know I have to leave at 6pm for an event I'll focus and get the task done. Working from home has been a huge problem as its hard to define boundaries and working after dinner or weekends has become normal (when I say working I mean browsing of course)
I'm an addict
181–190 of 602 posts
Re: I'm an addict
#182Knowing that HN is generally against it, I say it anyway: I recommend religion and religious teachings which address this and many other daily worldly issues perfectly. Christianity and Judaism both have excellent resources. Religious scholars have actually been the best psychologists but are generally dismissed by non-believers. Edit: for those asking for specific recommendations. It’s always best to find your own p…
christianity is most certainly not the solution, therapy is
I’m going to start by absolutely agreeing with you on the second half: I have had direct personal contact with a number of addicts over the years, and in virtually all cases it started (and generally continued to be) as a way to escape or numb some kind of unaddressed trauma or other emotional pain. Victims of (childhood or adult) abuse, parental rejection for whatever reason, etc. Additionally, people who I wouldn’t categorize as addicts but rather as… acute substance abusers. The people who don’t drink all week but go to the bar with some friends and end up drinking a dozen beer.
Therapy has changed a lot of people around me’s lives for the better. Indisputably. I have seen 20-year alcoholics change virtually overnight when their abusers are finally caught and the addict-victim goes and talks it through with a therapist.
Where I’m going to disagree, though, is that this is a black and white “Christianity or therapy” issue. I’m coming at this pragmatically; I haven’t been to church in almost 20 years now and religion is virtually non-existent in my life. There’s two things, though, with religion in general that can be hugely useful for someone struggling with addiction and/or substance abuse:
- Therapy-like religious guidance. Many denominations of Christianity (and other religions, but I am not particularly familiar with the exact customs) encourage you to share your burdens with either the leadership or broader community.
- Community itself. Beyond the primary “you are destroying your body” issues with addiction, one of the worst secondary effects is the social effects. When you have a substance abuse problem, “ordinary” people will start to distance from you. This can either end up with you just isolating from the world and getting lonelier (amplifying the problem) or seeking community with whoever you can find who won’t reject you (other people with substance abuse problems… amplifying the problem)
Religion can provide these things and while it’s not for me, I have a hard time dismissing it outright. Especially since we have, as society has become more secular, mostly failed at establishing accessible community institutions that provide these things. One of the most interesting things to me is that almost every other community is generally focused around either specific activities (eg a rock climbing gym, martial arts, bird watching, knitting) or specific professions (eg software developer meet-ups). Church is one of the few places in the world that I’m likely to encounter a very broad cross-section of society.
That all being said, quality varies dramatically. There are some churches that are, to me, completely toxic and have strayed far from “bringing light into this world”.
YMMV, but it works for some people and provides exactly what they need to heal.
Re: I'm an addict
#183Do you have a job?
Re: I'm an addict
#184Knowing that HN is generally against it, I say it anyway: I recommend religion and religious teachings which address this and many other daily worldly issues perfectly. Christianity and Judaism both have excellent resources. Religious scholars have actually been the best psychologists but are generally dismissed by non-believers. Edit: for those asking for specific recommendations. It’s always best to find your own p…
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Re: I'm an addict
#185We're all being sucked in the internet. It's so easy to become addict to video, podcasts, games, etc. nowadays that I would not be surprised if that becomes a major society issue.
Yeah I'm surprised there are lots of articles about keeping ipads from children, but not much about their parents.
Re: I'm an addict
#186Knowing that HN is generally against it, I say it anyway: I recommend religion and religious teachings which address this and many other daily worldly issues perfectly. Christianity and Judaism both have excellent resources. Religious scholars have actually been the best psychologists but are generally dismissed by non-believers. Edit: for those asking for specific recommendations. It’s always best to find your own p…
For those of you complaining about SnowHill9902 recommending religion, please check out Optimize.me (free) for something secular. It's still, IMO, the best collection of practical self-help knowledge and insight available on the internet.
Re: I'm an addict
#187This hits hard. I recently counted hours watched on YT (via history export) and OH MY GD, it averaged around 3 hours daily throught the year, for several years. I just imagined WHAT IF I have spent this amount of effort and time on ANYTHING else: playing an instrument, learning a new language, coding a side-project. The thought scared me so much, aka the difference between current me and "potential" me that I have ab…
Very un-HN take but maybe you're not meant to be 100% efficient all the time, maybe having some time to be passive and relax is good actually. Maybe we work far too much already and expecting to be additionally productive outside those hours is an express train to burnout?
I don’t think the parent comment is arguing for 100% efficiency though. They just don’t feel comfortable watching YT for an average of 3 hours a day.
Re: I'm an addict
#188Consider talking to a doctor about ADD? (Alternatively, get some Adderall somewhere and experiment.) Executive control is a distinct mental capability.
Maybe but it seems too common - does nearly everyone have ADD?
Re: I'm an addict
#189It seems like the OP had/has an addiction to gaming videos (the only hint was something about esports). I think about this a lot... is all video content considered equal if you had a near addiction level affinity for it?
Watching Fortnite/Minecraft/Roblox videos all night is a zero sum activity... you might get better at the that particular game, but it's a useless skill for 99.999% of us (child labor issues aside). On the other hand, if you use that time learning an actual skill or absorbing general useful information, I think there might be an argument that it's time well spent.
When we are young, we have an incredible ability to grind on things, especially when sleep deprived. As we get older, that becomes much harder and our productivity inevitably falls. I'm finding more and more that I have to go with my bursts of motivation when it hits and ride that wave as far as possible. A little sleep depravation here and there isn't an issue.
All of this falls apart when your life is negatively impacted and you are not adequately managing your health, responsibilities and/or achieving your goals. To sum it up, I don't think an "addiction" to useful information is a bad thing. We live in an unprecedented time of nearly limitless access to information. To have someone not only tell you the information you want to know, but also demonstrate it is game changing. Addictions are bad, but watching Youtube can lead to incredible learning momentum. Achieving that with a balanced life is something I personally strive for.