171–180 of 191 posts
I think the big problem here is that your co-workers are assholes, no skills level can change that.
i think it's too early to judge these guys either positively or negatively. it might be that the friction you're experiencing at this point is a result of things like working with rotten code, them withholding the specific domain knowledge, etc. and what you take for your own incompetency in reality is someone else's mess dropped on your head.
I know this is going to sound ridiculous, but start going to the gym and build some muscle. This will build your confidence, and put your pencil neck co-workers on guard.
1) He was a fresh out of college, and had no job for an year. He started working on Ruby on Rails for me. Every day, I'd make sure I let him know when he wasn't performing upto the mark, sometimes even going to extremes where I ended up making him cry. (I know it was bad on my part, and I apologized). 2) I did however make it a point never to tell him anything to solve his issues. If I thought/noticed that he isn't progressing, then I'd just drop a word or two, and leave it upto him to figure out that I have left him a hint. 3) I considered myself the worst senior to have, but today, due to him being hard working and the go-figure-yourself attitude I gave him, he is currently very successful at him current job, and is able to take on problems and come up with solutions by himself.
Coming to how is this relevant to you: Are you sure your colleagues are not giving you hints, or pushing you to find answers by yourself? Lending a hand is okay, but mostly I have seen that ending up creating a spoon feed me mentality.
On how to keep your dignity, I'd say there is no other way than to keep learning. If you are a software dev, attend hackathons/talks/etc, and keep yourself updated on the latest.
Rotten attitudes is not always the case, but sometimes the pressure to be the best pushes you to that side. It's important to remember where you started at to remain a human.
2. No it is not normal, but if you work a little longer you standup for yourself and ask questions, they may expect the same from you.
3. The best people are the ones that are open for discussions and discover new ideas or views.
2. No it is not normal, but if you work a little longer you standup for yourself and ask questions, they may expect the same from you.
3. The best people are the ones that are open for discussions and discover new ideas or views.
My rule of thumb is that I always try to be the dumbest person in the room. If I'm the smartest person in the room, I'm not learning. I want to surround myself with people that know more than I do about things I know little about. My advice: 1) Shut up and listen 2) Ask them respectfully and professionally for advice when you need it 3) Shut up and listen some more If you're an engineer, I also recommend the followin…
> 1) Shut up and listen I like that but many people get irritated and feel you're not proactive enough if you just occasionally ask questions.
Regardless, you've been there four months; that's long enough to have made it work. It's toxic and abusive and you have to remove yourself from the situation ASAP. If you can afford to quit before finding another job, do so.
I do appreciate all the advice of how to make this work, and it's good advice in general, but bad advice for this situation. While the abuse may ease up after a while, the pecking order will remain the same and they will still be assholes. It's hard to learn through a bruised ego or a broken spirit.
On a side note, I have been the dumbest person in a company. I compensated by being the hardest working. The "smart ones" loved that I did the work while they did smart things.
I quit the job immediately, because you can't deal with those kind of people. It never works. However you can find great companies and people out there, the probability is higher than getting along with rotten engineers at least.
You really shouldn't focus so much of your time and energy thinking about your co-workers. This company clearly has a bad culture and it shows.
It's a good thing that you realize your weaknesses. Take some time off to truly understand what is it that you want in your career. Focus on things you are actually good at, and then figure out how to intersect those things with your career interests. Good Luck :)