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What no one talks about when running and selling a business

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Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#171

Post by CPLX »

ladytron wrote: post #52
scarface74 wrote: post #44

I am in my 40s and I work with a young married guy in his mid 20s who i would consider a level 1 software engineer on a scale of 1 to 5. He is a dreamer thinking he can strike it rich with his great startup idea working on it part time because he hears stories of all the people who sold their startups and thinks that's such a glamorous life. First I told him about survivorship bias and laid out basically the same sta…

Founders don't start companies to live a "pretty good life in the top 10%". We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world. We usually have more energy and sleep less than others. We love work. We love our business. Most of us would not want to be corporate "drones". It would be like a living death.

> We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world.

That's a theory.

I've been around this world a while and I'm pretty sure ego is the primary driving force for entrepreneurs. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I do have little patience for people telling me they want to "change the world" by creating an obviously inconsequential consumer web app or the equivalent. People want to be in charge, they want to be the boss, they want to be looked up to and praised and rewarded and feel different and exceptional. It's not so bad to just admit it.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#172

Post by ladytron »

ben_jones wrote: post #64
ladytron wrote: post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Founders don't start companies to live a "pretty good life in the top 10%". We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world. We usually have more energy and sleep less than others. We love work. We love our business. Most of us would not want to be corporate "drones". It would be like a living death.

I fear most entrepreneurs really do care about leaving a mark. Any mark. Ad tech companies? Big data (selling) companies? Marketing (convince the consumer to buy something excessive) companies? LinkedIn and other companies that intentionally force dark patterns on their users? Security companies selling spyware and hacking tools to anyone who'll pay? The world could do with fewer of those marks IMO.

The same could be said about the corporate raiders that run many tech companies. They leave ethics at the door "I'm just doing my job to support my family".

I think people who start their own companies sometimes do so because they can have more control over product quality and quality of life for their team.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#173

Post by bartread »

luckydude wrote: post #137
eric_b wrote: post #43

I'm not sure I love the article, but I agree with the author's sentiment. I'm 4 years in to a successful bootstrapped startup, and I've lost many close acquaintances. I simply don't have time to keep the social connections alive and I have not prioritized them. I'm somewhat introverted by nature so this is not really a major concern of mine at this time, but I suspect it may be a regret later. What is challenging for…

The "lucked into" thing resonates with me. I've done pretty well and have had a zillion people tell me I got lucky. I used to really resent that. I bootstrapped my company, I took no salary for the first 2-3 years, instead I was out consulting to bring in money so I could pay the people who worked for me. That didn't seem like luck to me. I built technology that most of you use daily, before I came along people thoug…

I think that's a rare and commendable attitude. The statistics in the article support the idea of luck. You did all the right things and succeeded. But how many of the people running the businesses that failed did all the right things as well? Probably a decent number of them. Not the majority, by any means, but a decent minority. A lot of people fail because they don't do the right things, but doing the right things isn't a guarantee of success: it's necessary but not sufficient.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#174

Post by yourapostasy »

inspector-g wrote: post #140
thrownfaraway12 wrote: post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I also, also sold my startup last year and am sitting on a nice pile of FU money. The pace I'd wound myself up to over the past 10 years of building culminated with a truly awful 2016 where I did little else but road-show, due-diligence, and try to hit targets required to close. I haven't spoken to some friends in years, and I'm having trouble connecting with current friends & other parents in my community who are mo…

Do you know of a good way to search/find such entrepreneur meet-ups? I find myself craving this sort of interaction more and more as time goes on.

If you are in the US, your local SCORE group might hold regular meetups. [1]

[1] https://www.score.org/

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#175

Post by clavalle »

hoodoof wrote: post #97

It seems to me that money isn't the issue here. The issue is that this guy is a jerk, that's all. Sounds like he has taken becoming rich as a license to set his inner jerk free.

Yup. I've seen really nice people become incredibly wealthy and stay incredibly (maybe a little too) kind and I've seen petty people get a little more cash than their neighbors and become intolerable condescending assholes.

It's about the person, not the money.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#176

Post by yourapostasy »

searchfaster wrote: post #134
jacquesm wrote: post #34

I don't see the correlation between 'being an asshole' and 'sold my start-up'. There are plenty of successful entrepreneurs that are perfectly capable of relating to others and treating their fellow men, friends and family with dignity and respect. Some people succeed because they're playing nice with others, some succeed in spite of not being able to do so, some even succeed because they are are assholes. There is n…

Exactly... I had the opportunity to meet an almost Billion dollar company founder. I went in feeling awkward but he was very nice, treated me with dignity and respect and never once did I feel uncomfortable. Within minutes, I felt like I was conversing with any one of my other colleagues or friends.

This is a learned skill anyone can refine, even before picking up their FU money, at virtually any income level. Even if you are a uni student; perhaps especially if you are a uni student. Nearly anywhere you go in the world, there will be people living in destitution on the streets. While a good proportion in the US have mental and substance abuse issues, an astounding number are starved for simple, decent, human companionship. Just someone, anyone, who treats them as another decent human being. Instead of a "drive-by", "dialing-it-in" donation where you hand them some goods and/or money, receive a "thank you", and that is the extent of the interaction (though they do appreciate that as well).

Sit down with them. Offer to buy them a meal at a nearby diner and say you want someone to chat with. Ask them how their day has been. Be a conversationalist to listen to their stories; and boy, do some of them ever have stories. Imagine you two are sitting next to each other on the same bus, and have an hour until you reach your destination.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#177

Post by meesterdude »

CPLX wrote: post #171
ladytron wrote: post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Founders don't start companies to live a "pretty good life in the top 10%". We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world. We usually have more energy and sleep less than others. We love work. We love our business. Most of us would not want to be corporate "drones". It would be like a living death.

> We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world. That's a theory. I've been around this world a while and I'm pretty sure ego is the primary driving force for entrepreneurs. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I do have little patience for people telling me they want to "change the world" by creating an obviously inconsequential consume…

> I do have little patience for people telling me they want to "change the world" by creating an obviously inconsequential consumer web app or the equivalent

I know what you mean - while also building a consumer app to change the world (well, the worlds of people).

There is certainly BS out there and it does draw out my patience. But likewise, there are apps and services out there that really are trying to change the world.

But in the end, you're not a mind reader. Everyone is different and has different reasons, although there are certainly trends.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#178

Post by CPLX »

meesterdude wrote: post #177
CPLX wrote: post #171

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> We do it because we are ambitious, want to solve huge technical and business problems, make our mark, and change the world. That's a theory. I've been around this world a while and I'm pretty sure ego is the primary driving force for entrepreneurs. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I do have little patience for people telling me they want to "change the world" by creating an obviously inconsequential consume…

> I do have little patience for people telling me they want to "change the world" by creating an obviously inconsequential consumer web app or the equivalent I know what you mean - while also building a consumer app to change the world (well, the worlds of people). There is certainly BS out there and it does draw out my patience. But likewise, there are apps and services out there that really are trying to change the…

While it's true that you can't read minds, it is at least somewhat possible to read actions. You can certainly see guys like Craig Newmark or Scott Heiferman who make obvious visible decisions against their own material self interest in service of a broader principle. For the most part it's those exceptions that prove the rule in my opinion.

Again, I don't think it's a pejorative observation at all. I think wanting to feel valuable and special, and a desire to have resources, are quite fine things to cultivate in life, and I think a decent measure of our society is to see how well we do at giving everyone an opportunity to do those things.

The original article in this thread seems to be written by someone who is consumed by regard for their own self image, and has trouble admitting it. Being self-deprecating is not the same thing as being humble at all, it's just the other side of the oversized ego coin.

He goes on about how great he is and then how horrible and hurtful he is as if those are the only two ways to possibly evaluate him, while excluding the obvious first default theory we all start with, which is that his life is mostly inconsequential.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#179

Post by awfgylbcxhrey »

wruza wrote: post #157
conductr wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Agree with the dilemma free part. I've found "adult" friendship works like this. Just hang out catch up have fun. Don't call me when your car breaks down, call a tow truck. I won't ask you to help me move, I'll hire movers. The story of your car breaking down is good stuff. Let's talk about it over beers. However, I say that with a realization that poorer people don't operate this way. They are still very much "it ta…

I offer them money. That may sound as jerk, but actually if you're serious and open, they will not blame you even if rejected. There is no real difference between "help me" and "give me money". Once everyone gets it, things become much easier. On TFA's money part: I wonder if he offered any help to his relatives after he got money. Buy them a present like ps4 for their kids or new tv. Help solving bureaucrative issue…

There is no real difference between "help me" and "give me money".

There's a huge difference. Actively putting in work alongside someone is a great bonding experience. Being "in it" with someone is completely different from putting up some money.

Re: What no one talks about when running and selling a business

#180

Post by arghIdontwantto »

gydfi wrote: post #14

> Material things do not make people happy, at all. Everybody says this, all the time. I would like to propose the controversial theory that actually material things do make people happy, at least within certain constraints. When I was younger I had shitty cheap material things which made me unhappy. Now I have better stuff which makes me happier. I used to have a shitty unairconditioned apartment. That made me unhap…

People that know me can vouch for the fact that as long as I am happy with where I live, I don't give a crap about things (I wear the cheapest sweatsuits I can find 90% of the time, I have no jewellery, watches, fancy cars, etc.) even though in my country I'm on the top 5-10% of earners. I bought an ok Mazda but could have bought a Porsche or Lexus with no problem. I got a 200 euro sweatsuit as a present, and while I appreciate the present, I get as much out of that as the 20 euro's ones I buy.

Having said that, my girlfriend is the opposite. She really likes material things. I see it in her eyes when she can put a nice pair of jeans (400+ USD) or her 2500 USD earrings that she truly smiles. She isn't a gold digger and doesn't want me to buy her expensive things (she has some money) but she loves and lives by branded clothes and items (I'm talking 330 USD tshirts, 5000 dollars bags) and the fact she can wear that makes her happy. I don't understand, but I come to accept that there are people that indeed are happy with material things!

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