Thanks for this post. As alone as one could be this Christmas. Family over 8000km away, and no real friends or significant other to spend it with. Have a huge deadline on January 6th but I cant bring myself to work any more for that today.
Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
161–170 of 326 posts
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#162My mum died in January and my Dad died a couple of weeks ago. We didn’t do much for Christmas as a family but I keep thinking of the interesting things to tell my Dad about that he’s not around to tell. He’d almost certainly be watching the James Webb Telescope launch
The passage of time is beyond daunting. The idea that in the blink of an eye my parents will be gone has never felt more true after being isolated from them and my home country for the past two years because of covid.
My heart sincerely goes out to you.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#163[deleted]
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#164Thank you for this gesture. I lost almost everything. Job, 7-year relationship, my mental health. Feeling that I'm not only alone but inadequate to have a life like anybody else. I'm still alive, so there's that.
Keep living tomorrow will be better.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#165Earlier quoted context omitted.
I’m a senior web application programmer in the US and absolutely suck at math. Most of the field doesn’t require much math. Basic geometry and algebra would be enough. Knowing the basics of how to calculate combinations and permutations is useful. Some people have recommended Kahn Academy. https://www.khanacademy.org/ Don’t be afraid to use a calculator when things get complex. Calculators are not cheating. But try t…
Thanks for the pointers.
I also suck at math. As a web dev, I don't need much but doing 2d/3d graphics gave me headaches for a while.
As a kid, I used to complain often and loudly that I would never need any of this stuff. Turns out I was wrong.
You can turn around your life. I did so in my 30s. I am only saying this because there's a high chance you are an old fart since you know and like kraftwerk.
As you have correctly guessed, it's not too late.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#166Thank you for this gesture. I lost almost everything. Job, 7-year relationship, my mental health. Feeling that I'm not only alone but inadequate to have a life like anybody else. I'm still alive, so there's that.
You were able to have a seven year long relationship. People spend their thirties or more without being in even one. I have tried and the best I could manage was 2 years. Second best was 4 months. At least according to me you definitely are not inadequate :)
Perfect!
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#167Thank you for this gesture. I lost almost everything. Job, 7-year relationship, my mental health. Feeling that I'm not only alone but inadequate to have a life like anybody else. I'm still alive, so there's that.
You can't always control much in life, but one thing I've learned that you can always control is perspective. Sometimes it's nice to be the "This Is Fine" dog, blissfully ignoring all that isn't right, and focusing on what is (that cup-o-joe in front of you?) Doing that can help when awaiting calmer seas.
Hang in there. I think the past two years have been rough for many, so you aren't alone in the struggles. If you haven't already gotten diet and exercise to a good point then that can also be good for helping both the body and the mind.
Additionally, I'm always up for a chat, if anyone ever needs someone to reach out to.
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#168I think this whole christmas thing makes a lot of people feel alone and depressed. I hate that. Posts like these make me think this even more. I am alone, and I like it. I can play Warzone and code some stuff I wanted to finish. I can do things I like. I know this may sound stupid, but if you feel alone, don't. There is no reason to. It's just a day like many others. There is really nothing to it. And we don't need "…
Organizing a Christmas virtual video drop-in meeting of folks feeling isolated sounds like a worthy way to offer some company
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#169I’m in the same position, but it’s okay.
Have a virtual hug back! And a virtual hug to anyone else who needs it!!
Re: Tell HN: You are not alone this Christmas
#170Thank you for this gesture. I lost almost everything. Job, 7-year relationship, my mental health. Feeling that I'm not only alone but inadequate to have a life like anybody else. I'm still alive, so there's that.
Hang in there! Mental health is serious business, I hope you have a good professional you can turn to.
Programming is a great distractions, as others have pointed out. Make sure you don't use it to completely displace the pain you're feeling. You need to spend some time with it as well, that's how we humans deal with an it. Alternating between moments of distraction and periods of "dealing" is a good middle way, I think.
You're a great human being, never forget that.