I hope people do realize this will not actually accomplish anything besides giving us a laugh today? In the long run, a piece of criticism that lays out exactly what goes wrong with these methodologies, when management push and prescribe them instead of (teams of) programmers adopting some choice techniques because they help the do their programming more efficiently, will be more effective. It could be quoted by motherfucking programmers to their motherfucking managers for years to come. This will fade away in a few days.
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161–170 of 297 posts
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#162Does Programming, Motherfucker really scale though? Every process listed is about teams of people Programming Together, Motherfucker. I've seen two people engaged in Programming, Motherfucker without Talking to Eachother, Motherfucker and the results were Disastrous, Motherfucker.
Took a while to write a manifesto, after suggesting this on September 7 2010: I'm going to start a post-Agile programming methodology called, "Programming, Motherfucker." It'll be awesome. http://twitter.com/zedshaw/status/23267170323
That's because in the meantime Zed's been Programming, Motherfucker.
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#163Does Programming, Motherfucker really scale though? Every process listed is about teams of people Programming Together, Motherfucker. I've seen two people engaged in Programming, Motherfucker without Talking to Eachother, Motherfucker and the results were Disastrous, Motherfucker.
Nothing really scales. There is no process that will allow 100 hacks to make a Michelangelo, if you want a Michelangelo you're going to have to fucking hire him. If this bullshit really worked then corporate IT departments would be the envy of every startup out there. If your software is late/buggy/whatever the solution is rarely adding people / process. It's usually removing people / process. Process is what allows…
Not necessarily. I was once working in a large software project (500+ people), which went off-track, and then some added processes helped to save it, like for example continuous preintegration and more rigorous testing before each check-in.
I agree with the parent comment. "Just programming" looks nice on a manifesto, but you need processes when you want to scale.
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#164Earlier quoted context omitted.
You're right, I skipped the Unity and Profit steps of CHE-UP since that's not Programming, Motherfucker.
if you missed the CHE-UP talk zed gave at mwrc, you can watch it here: http://www.justin.tv/confreaks/b/281745310 starting at about the 15 minute mark
That was pretty good, can we get the slides anywhere?
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#165Samuel L. Jackson is a programmer. Haven't you seen Jurassic Park, motherfucker?
Hold on to your butts!
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#166Does Programming, Motherfucker really scale though? Every process listed is about teams of people Programming Together, Motherfucker. I've seen two people engaged in Programming, Motherfucker without Talking to Eachother, Motherfucker and the results were Disastrous, Motherfucker.
You can't talk to your colleagues without a Scrum meeting? That seems to be a personal issue, not a methodology issue.
That's the thing, Scrum basically assumes that all software teams are so dysfunctional that they won't talk to each other unless and until everyone is watching.
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#167The fact that I agree with all of this just makes me sadder at how it was presented. Thanks for building a handy straw man for the methodology developers to attack. I flagged this --- it's virtually content free --- but that's a futile gesture given how susceptible HN is to this particular form of social engineering.
Flagged ---- seriously?
With a title containing 'motherfucker' ----- you should have known it wasn't totally serious.
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#168By the way, I fucking heard that if you fucking abuse the shittyfucking cursewords, they fucking lose their motherfucking value. (This is gonna cost me some points, I am sure)
Not at all! Just try not to repeat yourself. Be creative. Invective can be a form of poetry. See, e.g., Gunnery Sergeant Hartman in Full Metal Jacket. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8Nf1MK7lts
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#169I'll be looking forward to adding Certified Programming Motherfucker (CPM) to my CV
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#170I'm currently tasked with cleaning up a project which no one can explain how it all worked because none of the Programming Motherfuckers bothered to write any Documentation, Motherfucker.
Code written by true programming motherfuckers is self-documenting, motherfucker.
or written by unicorns, motherfucker.