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Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

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Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#161
post #31

My solution is similar (breaking down the problem), the cause is - at least partially - different. If I am procrastinating in software development or research it is (1) for complexity reasons, (2) for foreseeable vast grunt work I have already done and solved in the past. Example (1): I have to choose between at least two fundamental different ways to get ahead in writing software. I know that implications come late,…

Those resonate with me as well. For (1), it seems to strike for tasks that I feel "should" be simple, but in fact simply are not. Accepting that seems to help.

For (2), I do indeed loathe retracing some task that's similar to something I've done in the past. One thing that sometimes helps is to find a way to put a new spin on it. Maybe use an unfamiliar language or data structure. Or optimize for something different. Or push 'git' to the max while working on it.

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#162
post #73

Words of warning from a not so young (36) chronic procrastinator with a rather messed up life: Take it seriously. I'm not talking about reading HN in your 7th work hour when doing stupid Excel sheets. I'm talking about messing up years and years of your life. I believe it's a symptom of some deeper issues and it won't go away from alone. Lack of sleep, stress, work overload, information overload amplify the effects b…

I hear you. For me, it is a feeling like you said, of never being able to catch up. Like with debt, for years, I would just keep spending on my credit cards. I tried consolidating several times, and finally, I have used a 401k loan against myself to consolidate. My student loans and car loan are paid off, and I have When something seems hopeless, or too much to overcome, I think the mind says "fuck it", and wants to…

"Fuck, there should be a support group for this."

Be the change you want to see!

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#163

Just want to say that if someone here truly has tried to overcome procrastination, but still fails, try to get screened for ADD/ADHD. Even though it's a condition that is also quite over diagnosed, it's simultaneously a condition that's underdiagnosed IMO - it really depends on where you're looking / sampling. A lot of kids fly under the radar, because they don't show any obvious signs, even more so those with ADD /…

I probably have that, but then what? The treatment seems to be doses of speed, essentially, and I worry that the cure would be as bad as the disease.

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#164

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Or a closer analogy, like someone saying "Oh I'm such OCD" because they arranged their pens in colour order.

Because having a variety of pens in various colors is a privilege or ?

Because "actual" OCD is much more intense and negatively impacting your life than someone who likes their pens neat and tidy... People washing hands until they bleed every day, being unable to open a door without performing some sort of ritual, etc...

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#165

People wouldnt procrastinate if there wasn't some evolutionary advantage... Personally, I have found that if I get on with certain tasks in a team environment with too much vigor, I start to get other team members feeling left out or feeling their input isn't adding value. Keep doing it and the team will fall apart. Sitting around and being lazy for a bit helps keep the team together and has more forward progress ove…

> People wouldnt procrastinate if there wasn't some evolutionary advantage...

The awful truth is that "doing nothing" or at least "waiting a bit" is quite often the right thing to do from a survival perspective.

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#166
post #148

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I haven't been able to find a "final" solution. Most recently I've been writing things down with pen and paper to keep me on task. To make the ethereal physical and break it down into steps and checklists. Again totally recommend this video on the wall of awful for ADHD procrastination https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uo08uS904Rg

[flagged]

I doubt it was intentional

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#167

> What's the next action I'd need to take to make some progress? Don't break the whole task down. That will be sure to overwhelm you. Isn't this the idea behind Getting Things Done in a nutshell?

Yeah :) The two key questions to always keep in mind:

(1) What's the desired outcome?

(2) What's the next action?

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#168
Interesting topic. Any of you doing everything right - work, sports, cooking, some reading, etc - but procrastinating social life? I feel like that's what I do. I always have excuses not to go out to meet new people or meet the people I know. Meeting people in general feels like something I should do and thereby not that enjoyable. Work feels like something I should do less - because I want to have a life! - and thereby is highly enjoyable.

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#169
post #125

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I assume you do programming in your day job. If so, no matter what HN crowd claims about side projects, picking another programming task as your extra curricular activity can be the main reason why you are easily distracted. Maybe by the end of the week (or work day) you are simply tired of looking at screens with small and dense text.

It may be cliche, but I found a bunch of non-computer hobbies and it helped a lot. Unfortunately it also gave me a glimpse of life not spent sitting in front of a screen, and while I still love programming, I am looking for a way to escape using computers for a living. Sorry, software industry, it's not you, it's the screens.

I love programming but it's starting to get to my spine. I'm self employed which is great cause I get to spend my micro breaks on a mattress (and stepping away from the screen seems to help me think over what I'm working on -- diffuse mode thinking).

Considering getting a real job but something tells me most offices aren't suitable for lying down. (I read about someone on a polyphasic sleep schedule who took her afternoon nap during the lunch break and she had to hide in the server room!)

Re: Procrastination is driven by our desire to avoid difficult emotions, says expert

#170

Whenever I do something. I assume that it's going to be a business failure. That helps me to avoid procrastination which could otherwise arise out of a fear of failure. Business success is not within my own control so everything I do needs to have a "fallback purpose". Everything I do is at once a business opportunity, a learning experience and a technical stepping stone which I can re-use for future projects. All of…

Is this just to shard yourself from perfectionistic impulses? As in you allow yourselves to do a "subpar" job, and in thinking that way, it relieves you from the stress that you need to hit a certain bar? As I understand it, you approach your work as if it were a prototype to be discarded soon. That actually makes sense if you have a natural tendency to fret about quality.

One of my open source projects became quite popular so I wouldn't say that my approach reduces my degree of perfectionism or hurts my projects' chances of adoption; if anything, it has the opposite effect. It provides me unlimited time which allows me to think really hard about every decision I make - It gives me the freedom to always choose the most long term solution. I'm not trying to get lucky catching the next big wave and timing it just right. Not looking for a lucky break. I'm trying to work towards a reliable result in the long term and I'm getting closer every year.

Not caring too much about the economic results behind the work is absolutely critical for this approach to work at all. If I broke down or considered giving up every time I experienced an economic disappointment or my project didn't get any attention, I wouldn't have gotten anywhere near as far as I did today.

It took me 10 years before I could monetize my project such that I could work on it full time. It was literally a decade of almost no income at all and almost nobody taking my work seriously. Then suddenly one day in the 10th year I started earning good passive income from that project. If I was even slightly focused on financial results or even popularity score, I would have given up on year 2.

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