The simple version is that I'm a perfectionist that cares about deep understanding, and I had a good career that fit me well with distributed systems. However, at core, I'm curious and passionate in a way that requires management to smooth me over.
So, I didn't want to be in big tech anymore since the game to play kind of sucks. No matter what "they" tell you, at a certain point, every company drains real creativity for one reason or another.
I love coding, and I can even play the strategy game at the higher level (I 'retired' as a 'senior principal'). So, I could have a very cushy life in big tech, but my heart is to build and tinker.
Low and behold, I decided to wander and build a thing that I cared about. I built https://www.adama-platform.com/ , but I could never really get traction without in person friends. Honestly, I wanted to wander and build, but I found myself in a field alone with a lot of ideas.
The sheer effort to promote new ideas is... exhausting. It's just a stream of failure after failure after failure, and then my home was destroyed. I literally ran out of a burning building, and my priorities changed.
Now, I could probably recover my ideas since I was preparing a new marketing push and try to meet developers where the are ( https://adamawww2.adama.games/ ). The idea was to let my ideas power the stranger topological scenarios (like cron jobs). And, given my background, I could probably have credible success raising funds around "real time infrastructure" / "pub sub" / "gateway". The problem there is then I recreate the problem I was escaping, so why bother with that.
So, now I'm going to just build a barndo with a full gym and get super duper fit. I honestly think doing pull ups will make me feel 10x better than accomplishing anything in tech.