Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content • Hacker News Board

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#151

Post by temp_praneshp » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:08 PM UTC

rychco wrote: post #112

ivraatiems wrote: post #78

I have some good friends who've gone the other way: they've asked that there be as close to no photos or videos of their child on any social media as possible. They don't post about him online, and they keep pictures of him in photo albums. When he was born, they asked all of us to please refrain from taking photos of him without their permission. I completely support this and I intend to do something similar for my…

I try to do this for myself, & often request that nobody take photos of me if possible, but definitely to not to post images of me online without my explicit permission. Even amongst my close friends & family, it frequently causes friction & outright anger.

Do you actually phrase it as a request? I find that some social media averse people also tend to be curt/sharp with their requests (I totally understand the underlying concern though).

I feel like photos are nothing special, a lot of the friction/anger people are just responding to perceiving an accusatory tone. (But I'm willing to let the odd photo slide, so maybe dropping the worst arguments made life easier)

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#152

Post by ht85 » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:09 PM UTC

paperwasp42 wrote: post #136

One of the most horrifying social media pages I've seen was an influencer who billed herself as a "trans activist" and documented every moment of her trans daughter's life. This poor kid was 8-years-old and attempted suicide on a regular basis. Every time she tried to kill herself, the mom would document the gritty details, post pictures and details about it online (and of course get massive likes/shares by well-inte…

> It is bizarre for an 8-year-old to know that Tylenol and wrist-slitting are both preferred methods for suicide, and to act on this knowledge

As a parent this really stands out. I have a kid around that age and almost his entire "serious" knowledge comes from home. He does pick a lot from other kids at school but in a very abstract way.

When I think about what is on his mind compared to what you painted there, the difference is mind-blowing. A good illustration of the dangers of social media for people —of all age— who lack guidance and perspective.

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#153

Post by anotherparent » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:13 PM UTC

ivraatiems wrote: post #78

I have some good friends who've gone the other way: they've asked that there be as close to no photos or videos of their child on any social media as possible. They don't post about him online, and they keep pictures of him in photo albums. When he was born, they asked all of us to please refrain from taking photos of him without their permission. I completely support this and I intend to do something similar for my…

I am a parent of a toddler and he’s only on Apple Photos, my wife and I don’t use social media.

That said, I expect to be downvoted into oblivion.

> anonymity is one of the best gifts I can give them

I don’t know, I mean a lot of parents tell themselves they are doing a lot of things, me included, that they have no control over in reality.

I sympathize with the parents who try to turn their kids into celebs. We made this celebs-rule world.

For every one person, kids or adults, who feels exposed online, there are 99,999 more toiling away in obscurity.

On this forum probably the children are going to be fine. Their parents are rich enough that even if you are not a nepo baby in the strictest sense of having a famous last name, they will be fine. They can do whatever and they will be fine.

If you’re some random person, obscurity is crushing. If you’re not a nepo baby and you have no above average cognitive gifts, which is 80% of people, getting some attention can change your life.

Most people have the level of drama, the stupidity, the vapidity of influencers. You just didn’t know that until TikTok. TikTok doesn’t cause this, it doesn’t even exacerbate it.

And social media DOES benefit them, it IS rational. It’s the textbook definition of elitism to tell people who found a little fame and like it that they aren’t like the smart kids or true blue nepo babies, who can be offline and still thrive in this world.

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#154

Post by lotsofpulp » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:14 PM UTC

jstarfish wrote: post #148

lotsofpulp wrote: post #116

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Would you have allowed America’s Funniest Home Videos? Or sharing of videos on Youtube like this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_Bit_My_Finger Of course, when there was no money in it, it was easier to assume children were not being harmed or otherwise manipulated for the purpose of making the video.

AFHC and the stations that aired it were at least accountable to the FCC (and advertisers) if things got weird. Advertisers knew what the show entailed. There is no such licensing or enforcement mechanism for amateur online content creators (except 2257), and the "stations" are absolved of any complicity (230). Advertisers have little idea what content they're sponsoring since content delivery is a shell game. Creato…

Yes, so I would think the first solution is proper enforcement of existing laws.

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#155

Post by _trampeltier » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:15 PM UTC

golergka wrote: post #70

davidguetta wrote: post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have weirdly mixed feelings on your comment. - I agree that parents who publicize their children on social media are massive creep in my opinion, who do a massive invasion of the child privacy. That should almost be illegal in my opinion since the child can't consent. - At the same time saying that no skin should ever be shown ever because "it titills sexual creeps" is a dark road that points in a direction which i…

Should we make Nirvana's Nevermind cover illegal?

Today it would be impossible. But also much other things in media. Like the first James Bond Casino Royale (1967). There is a scene in a tube with Bond and a younger than 18 years old girl in a tube. Or a in the movie Kickboxer (1988) with Van Damme. There is a scene when they are on a boat on a river in Thailand. You can see at least one young boy complete nude from frontside. Another scene later in the hospital. The brother just grop the butt from the nurse and everybody is laughing. To watch it today feels very strange.

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#156

Post by Arrath » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:16 PM UTC

paperwasp42 wrote: post #136

One of the most horrifying social media pages I've seen was an influencer who billed herself as a "trans activist" and documented every moment of her trans daughter's life. This poor kid was 8-years-old and attempted suicide on a regular basis. Every time she tried to kill herself, the mom would document the gritty details, post pictures and details about it online (and of course get massive likes/shares by well-inte…

> This poor kid was 8-years-old and attempted suicide on a regular basis. Every time she tried to kill herself, the mom would document the gritty details, post pictures and details about it online

What in the absolute fuck.

That's monstrous

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#157

Post by brightlancer » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:17 PM UTC

ryandrake wrote: post #60

snapplebobapple wrote: post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

While I find parents doing this extremely concerning I am personally really hesitant to change anything because I can't think of any way to change it that doesn't seriously hinder normal and not creepy parental uses of images/videos of their children. We are already running into overreach problems trying to curtail the stuff we clearly need to curtail (i.e. that guy having to deal with the police for sending his kid'…

I like the (for some reason downvoted) reasonable suggestion by someone else to simply not monetize videos containing children. Doesn't YouTube already have some kind of classifier that finds children in videos, which lets them turn off commenting on those videos? Just extend that to also de-monetize them. Sure, it doesn't solve the problem of child videos using other monetization channels like product placement, spo…

Will this apply to Hollywood movies which star minors? Or AMA winning musicians who are minors?

If we exempt them from your new rules, why?

We need to be very careful about Well Intentioned rules (or worse, laws) because they will be applied selectively and in ways the authors didn't intend.

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#158

Post by _trampeltier » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:17 PM UTC

colechristensen wrote: post #27

snapplebobapple wrote: post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

While I find parents doing this extremely concerning I am personally really hesitant to change anything because I can't think of any way to change it that doesn't seriously hinder normal and not creepy parental uses of images/videos of their children. We are already running into overreach problems trying to curtail the stuff we clearly need to curtail (i.e. that guy having to deal with the police for sending his kid'…

For starters, zero monetization of any social media content involving children. Second step, zero public posts involving children, maybe with some narrow carveouts.

In theory is already illegal, because it is child work. So I guess it is illegal in most countrys anyway.

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#159

Post by Spivak » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:24 PM UTC

paperwasp42 wrote: post #136

One of the most horrifying social media pages I've seen was an influencer who billed herself as a "trans activist" and documented every moment of her trans daughter's life. This poor kid was 8-years-old and attempted suicide on a regular basis. Every time she tried to kill herself, the mom would document the gritty details, post pictures and details about it online (and of course get massive likes/shares by well-inte…

Yeah this is one of those stories that if you really feel like it's worth telling so that people can understand the experience of trans kids and what it's like as a parent you need to contact a journalist who knows how to do this right so they can tell the story in a way that can't be traced back to you or your child. The very last thing someone who's trans needs is to have a spotlight shoved in their face involuntarily.

I actually do work in the space of telling the stories of trans folks (although not involving kids because obviously) and even with adults we still take crazy precautions. I push hard even when we get someone who doesn't want to be anonymous because you can't put that cat back in the bag and being a google search from being outed will haunt you if you ever want to "go stealth."

Re: Influencer parents and the kids who had their childhood made into content

#160

Post by akaij » Mon, Mar 13, 2023, 7:24 PM UTC

jstarfish wrote: post #133

mablopoule wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, society would absolutely be culturally impoverished if this would be considered off-limit. Limiting the space of 'allowed' expression and saying it's okay because culture is not essential isn't really the best path to take as a society.

If you Photoshop the penis out, there would be nothing remarkable about the cover. It was child exploitation as a marketing gimmick. I think the Scorpions did something similar with putting an underage girl on the Virgin Killer album, but that may have been non-photographic (not looking it up). Decades later, Nirvana is still a topic of discussion because of it (and still earning royalties), while the kid in question…

> If you Photoshop the penis out, there would be nothing remarkable about the cover.

Says you.

> Decades later, Nirvana is still a topic of discussion because of it (and still earning royalties), ...

I think the album's popularity and the royalties aren't solely attributable to the cover :)

> We don't need to exploit children as a form of creative expression...

There is no pornography, no sexual abuse, in fact there's nothing sexual about it at all, and the parents were paid for the photo. Please help me understand how it constitutes exploitation.