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A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

askamanager.org

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Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#151
post #143

> Right now I’m working in the previous position with almost double my paycheck, so it’s a great turnaround. I don't know if this was a good idea. You've signaled to your company that you're willing and able to take legal action against them. How long will your employment last when your neck is sticking out 2x farther than your coworkers and there's a layoff coming around?

If they really doubled the paycheck, then the writer can presumably pay off debt and begin saving up a rainy day fund so that any layoff will be taken in stride.

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#152
post #65

Kind of orthogonal to the story, but anyone who steals lunch or food from a co-worker should be fired immediately. There's a 0% chance that someone who steals others' stuff is a good, honest person in other parts of their life.

I actually had a boss who stole my lunch. His wife cooks for him so he didn't know/remember what food he was bringing to work and he had the same kind of (IKEA) lunch box as me. He apologized and bought me lunch the next day so it was absolutely fine in the end but there was a moment of confusion and some colleagues mocking me.

That's not stealing. That's just an unintentional mistake. Pedantic, yeah, but quite different morally.

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#153

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Mistakes happen. There are all sorts of ways you could accidentally eat someone else's lunch, and having a 'zero tolerance' policy is a good way to end up firing an innocent person.

Accidentally take, sure. Accidentally consume? Maybe one bite. Unless there were some odd circumstances, like mental deficiency, or nearly identical meals, beyond one bite is very difficult to believe.

Another HN user offered a story (that doesn't seem super unlikely) that would disagree with you:

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=16944591

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#155

Kind of orthogonal to the story, but anyone who steals lunch or food from a co-worker should be fired immediately. There's a 0% chance that someone who steals others' stuff is a good, honest person in other parts of their life.

I generally agree with what you're saying. It's kind of hilarious to me that so many people here don't know what "stealing" means. Have they not read the article at all? News flash: the act of stealing requires intention. Accidentally swiping someone's ambiguously-labeled lunch is very different!!

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#156

One mystery that continues to fascinate me is when people at work say things to me that are obviously irrational -- are they sincere or is it some kind of manipulative power play? I've had managers ask me things such as "When will the rebuild of the website be done" and I answer "In two months" and they say "You have two weeks" and I say "Maybe 6 weeks, but not 2" and then they repeat "You've got two weeks." I wonder…

I'd leave that toxic workplace as soon as I find a better option with the minimum pay I need.

A dog is very friendly to everyone. But some street dogs are dangerous. It is not their fault. They have been abused and exposed to harassment when they were young. They think all humans are dangerous, so they'll bite anyone that approaches them.

The same is happening for your boss. He had a bad relation with developers (or employees) and then his subconscious is generalizing it over every other person.

So he thinks that any employee is a lying prick piece of shit. And that the only way to get you to work is to dominate you. Because that's how things work in his mind.

Needless to say, the best course of action is to leave to a saner workplace.

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#157
post #87

This feels like a made-up story designed to attract clicks. Even more with the happy ending update. There are more unlikely stories on the same site, like this one: http://www.askamanager.org/2017/05/im-in-a-dominantsubmissiv...

It’s the equivalent of a Penthouse “you’ll never believe what happened next” letter for office drones. I can’t believe so many people are taking it at face value!

I suspect ColinWright posted this exactly to find out how many people would believe it.

The good old days of social experiments on HN.

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#158
post #102
post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe it is "always wrong" given a particularly rigid and simplistic code of ethics, but in American society at least we are very comfortable with the notion of causing deserved harm (whether physical, financial, or merely emotional) to wrongdoers as a deterrent to others.

I hope you do not actaully think that is way things are or the law works because it does not. In the US the law allows for you to make the case of self defense, it is a defense for violations of the law. I.E. it is always illegal to kill someone, but it is a defense if you kill someone who was trying to kill you.. Things like bobby traps, or poisoning your food against a thief would not be legal under American law. F…

I certainly understand that it's not legal to turn your house, nor your lunch, into a deathtrap. Nor at any point did I claim that any particular kind of action was legal. I said that Americans generally feel that we're collectively justified in harming certain kinds of people. That's not a claim about legality. That's a claim about how a subset of the population feels.

My use of "we" was merely meant to indicate that our society, through the apparatus of our legislators, has decided that our society is justified in doing harm to certain classes of people and has set up mechanisms for doing this. I was not using "we" in the "me and my immediate peers" sense.

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#159
post #114

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Is it illegal to booby trap your property?

Yes. The basic idea is that you cannot do via a trap what you couldn't do in person, which I think is sensible. If you are not allowed to shoot someone who merely sets foot on your property, then you are also not allowed to rig a shotgun to a tripwire that does the same thing.

The relevant case is Katko v. Briney.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Katko_v._Briney

Re: A coworker stole my spicy food, got sick, and is blaming me (2016)

#160

One mystery that continues to fascinate me is when people at work say things to me that are obviously irrational -- are they sincere or is it some kind of manipulative power play? I've had managers ask me things such as "When will the rebuild of the website be done" and I answer "In two months" and they say "You have two weeks" and I say "Maybe 6 weeks, but not 2" and then they repeat "You've got two weeks." I wonder…

If you get in these conversations, when they say "You have 2 weeks", I found it to be best to shift the conversation to cutting scope rather than giving out shorter estimates.

Its also helpful to get an answer to why they need it in 2 weeks, so you can say "I can get Y done in 2 weeks, which is the part you need for demo Z".

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