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“Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

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Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#141

Post by mannkind »

abandonliberty wrote: post #109
tcfunk wrote: post #95

Something I haven't seen anyone bring up is the way that "thank you" or "sorry" are delivered. I'm not familiar enough with other languages to know if they have similar variances in speech, but in english you can very much change the meaning of your message with the tone of your voice or your rate of speech. Nearly any phrase can come off as condescending given the right delivery.

Thank you so much for raising that point. I've spoken English since childhood and I've still gotten it wrong. So awkward. "No, wait, that sounded sarcastic. I really meant it! Ok, that didn't sound any better. Let me start over."

> Thank you so much for raising that point.

That seems a bit sarcastic ... ;)

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#142

Post by amalag »

harryh wrote: post #126
bpyne wrote: post #111

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think we need to have a better idea what's meant by "family ties". I'm from the US. My teammate on a project is a woman from India. (We're both working in the US.) She doesn't have children, but I have a 9yo daughter. We talk about differences in how my wife and I raise our daughter versus how she was raised. My wife and I follow the trend in the US of being very involved in our daughter's life. We walk her to scho…

Articles like this make me think the Indian way is better: http://aeon.co/magazine/culture/children-today-are-suffering... I'm about to have a kid (wife is 8 months pregnant) so I've been thinking about this some. Unfortunately though, a lot of this is culture and individual parents can't necessarily do a lot. It doesn't matter if I'd rather my kid play in a pick-up game instead of an organized league if all the othe…

That is an interesting article but I don't think they do it any better in India. In India there is even more emphasis on memorizing things. In India academics are probably over emphasized.

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#143

Post by harryh »

amalag wrote: post #142
harryh wrote: post #126

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Articles like this make me think the Indian way is better: http://aeon.co/magazine/culture/children-today-are-suffering... I'm about to have a kid (wife is 8 months pregnant) so I've been thinking about this some. Unfortunately though, a lot of this is culture and individual parents can't necessarily do a lot. It doesn't matter if I'd rather my kid play in a pick-up game instead of an organized league if all the othe…

That is an interesting article but I don't think they do it any better in India. In India there is even more emphasis on memorizing things. In India academics are probably over emphasized.

shrug

I really have no idea. Was just responding to the parent comment which said: "In my teammate's experience, parents in India tend to be more hands off and let their kids develop independence earlier."

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#144

Post by fallinghawks »

marktangotango wrote: post #86
littletimmy wrote: post #49

As a non-American, this was one of the biggest culture shocks I faced. On the surface, relationships in the US seem very transactional (not making the judgment that they are really transactional). For example, in the US a son would thank his parents for paying his college tuition. In my culture, this would be insulting because it would suggest being distant from family, in the sense that the son ought to believe his…

>> In my culture, this would be insulting because it would suggest being distant from family, in the sense that the son ought to believe his parents wealth is his also, and later willingly contribute his earnings when his parents need anything. It is a difference in the degree to which individualism is the norm. This is very interesting, and brings to mind something I've been struggling with recently (I'm USA-ian by…

> I don't want my children to see my wealth as their wealth, or my success as their success

I think that's a good view. I had Chinese immigrant parents who did pretty well financially. They used money as a means of control: they gave me an extremely meager allowance but said if I ever wanted something, I should just ask. Meaning I could have it only if they also approved of it. This resulted in me getting jobs as soon as possible.

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#145

Post by ta119a08 »

littletimmy wrote: post #49

As a non-American, this was one of the biggest culture shocks I faced. On the surface, relationships in the US seem very transactional (not making the judgment that they are really transactional). For example, in the US a son would thank his parents for paying his college tuition. In my culture, this would be insulting because it would suggest being distant from family, in the sense that the son ought to believe his…

> I have a feeling that the non-American system is better because it fosters closer family ties, but that might just be because that's the system I'm familiar with.

Fostering closer family ties has good sides and bad sides.

Individuals from a toxic family background benefit from being able to keep their family at arm's length or farther, which isn't as acceptable in cultures that so strongly and universally emphasize family loyalty. Not all parents are good parents!

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#146

Post by fareesh »

adiM wrote: post #122
fareesh wrote: post #120

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Christians, Sikhs, Buddhists, Jains and "Others" - since my cultural background is a combination of some of those, I'm fairly confident that the author's perspective does not reflect my community, and likely some of the other minority communities, of which India has 7 million people.

And even Hindus. I grew up in North India and I was taught to say thank you to friends and even to family members e.g., say thank you after being offered snacks (what would be called hors d'oeuvres in the west), offered a chapati or additional daal or sabji during meals, etc. I did not say thank you to bus or cab drivers, but often did say thank you to shopkeepers.

Yes - just to clarify, my intent was to merely hypothesize at the idea that perhaps people ought to proceed with caution whenever some sort of behavior is categorized/stereotyped as "Indian", since in the case of India, even a minority is a very significant number of people.

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#147

Post by Retra »

darkroasted wrote: post #2

As an American, I've sometimes been bothered by the use of thank you. It is fine as a pleasantry at a restaurant. But it always felt odd coming from a boss or from the company CEO. I think to myself, "I didn't do this piece of work as a favor to you, I didn't because you are paying me and you told me to do it." It is interesting to read that this view is more common in other cultures. I also dislike putting "thank yo…

> I also dislike putting "thank you" in an email, before they have agreed to do the favor or task. It feels very presumptuous.

You're thanking someone for taking the time to read your email, not for completing some other task. You can say "thank you for your time" or "thank you for your consideration" if that makes more sense.

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#148

Post by icebraining »

School-Cotton wrote: post #137
icebraining wrote: post #90

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm not from the US, and I've never heard of anyone paid biweekly, that's why I found it weird. According to the US Bureau of Labour Statistics, it's actually the most common schedule over there: http://www.bls.gov/opub/btn/volume-3/how-frequently-do-priva...

Out of curiosity, how often is it standard to be paid where you are from? I've been paid twice monthly, and monthly. I also know of people being paid weekly.

Here in Portugal, almost everyone I know is paid monthly. Even the person who comes to my house weekly to clean asks to be paid once a month.

The only people I can think of who have a non-monthly regular pay schedule (not paid per job like freelancers) are door-to-door salespeople and mail ads deliverers.

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#149

Post by Retra »

toothbrush wrote: post #80
darklajid wrote: post #39

Over here in Germany we even had an optional 'Cultural differences' workshop you could participate in, which discussed things - both for Germans and for people from the US, the presenter was from the US - that might seem awkward at first. The ~social fillwords~ were on the list. Lots of thank you / you're welcome plus the really irritating 'How are you?' variations. Wouldn't you find these differences between any cul…

> Lots of ... irritating 'How are you?' variations. Pity that. I frequently ask people "how are you" at the beginning of a conversation, and it's very often ignored on the assumption that i'm using a formula, but i am usually genuinely curious ask to what's up, trying to get them to say something about themselves since the last time we spoke. Pity this idiom has suffered inflation, perhaps i should think of another t…

I hate it when people ask "how are you." Because I don't want to drop whatever I'm thinking about and start thinking about what you've asked, which is something that doesn't require any urgent attention.

It's like asking someone to retie their shoes every time you talk to them. So you'll get "I'm fine" because the question is meant to be dismissed quickly, not dwelled upon.

Re: “Thank You” in Hindi and English Mean Very Different Things

#150

Post by icebraining »

icebraining wrote: post #114
thedaemon wrote: post #110

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Bi-weekly means you would get 2 paychecks a week. Did you mean bi-monthly? Also to chime in a bit, I get a paycheck every week.

Bi-weekly means you would get 2 paychecks a week. That's not the definition everyone uses :) From the Bureau link I posted above: "Biweekly is the most common length of pay period, with 36.5 percent of U.S. private businesses paying their employees every 2 weeks." (Check out online dictionaries too: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/biweekly#Adjective ) It seems the difference between biweekly (using this definition) and…

By "That's not the definition everyone uses" I meant "that definition isn't used by everyone", not "the definition used by everyone isn't that".
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