I would like to recommend you to read Qur'an.
Suicidal Software Developer
141–150 of 258 posts
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#142I had struggled with untreated suicidal depression for 15 years. I was very quiet about it. I am a web developer. Three years ago I was divorced from my wife, left my birth religion and quit my job. On top of all my issues I was suffering from burnout – I hadn't had a vacation in years. Since I was the religious guy at my job I worked the holidays and was promised make up time. Company policy shifted at some point an…
Your story is in very many ways similar to mine (unfortunately, I'm still in the process of fixing my motivational problems). Care to get in touch via e-mail (mine is in the profile)? I'd love to know how you handled some of the religion-related issues.
Sure thing, I'll shoot you an email now.
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#143Earlier quoted context omitted.
This is very true. I have since come to realize that I was constantly trying to skirt around certain beliefs and rules. I found myself rationalizing more often than I care to admit.
I was in the exact same situation, in the same religion. I never 'bought' the stories, and practiced the beliefs to make my parents happy. I must add that I have other family members who lived a much more balanced life within the same religious beliefs and are quite happy and live fulfilled lives. My upbringing was to practice the beliefs 'by the book' which can be quite difficult and erodes one's self-esteem...
Congrats on getting out. I was the son of an elder and a Bethelite, so I definitly understand the difference between "week" and "strong" Witnesses.
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#144Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'm also a devoted Humanist. To me, most of religious doctrines are noble lies. The aim is to make us good humans to each other. The teachings have value. The power of Churches adulterates the messages. I was raised a Jew, but now most resonant with Jesus. The Old Testament God is a bitchy megalomanic. Jesus was a human being and I'd argue a Humanist searching for a new theological basis.
I'm glad you said this – I recently had the same thought. Jesus seems more like a humanist than a religious zealot. I would not be shocked to learn some day that the claims of being god, or god's son were later additions to his teachings.
You seem to have a specific view of what it means to be 'god', or the 'son of god', and are judging all religion through this lens.
The Quakers, for example hold that 'there is that of god in everyone'
Many forms of tantric Hinduism hold that the ultimate state of being is realizing one's unity with god.
The Sufi's (and some parts of non fundamentalist Islam) claim that one's experience of god is personal and cannot come through an intermediary.
What these ideas have in common is that god is not placed outside the human, but is an inner experience of the human, or a stage of development that can be reached.
What could be more humanist than the idea that humans are or can be in direct contact with the ultimate reality?
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#145I think he got it right when trying to figure out from this situation. Just do it!
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#146Threads like these are valuable research for me. We talk about being understanding of mental illness; of the need to destigmatise mental health problems to allow people to seek help and so on.
But then a thread like this will pop up. There are many useful, sincere, posts with really good advice. And then there are a few bafflingly bad, almost hateful, confused, ignorant (almost to the point of bigotry) posts.
These threads certainly help me understand why people do not disclose mental health problems to employers.
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#147Earlier quoted context omitted.
I'm glad you said this – I recently had the same thought. Jesus seems more like a humanist than a religious zealot. I would not be shocked to learn some day that the claims of being god, or god's son were later additions to his teachings.
You seem to have a specific view of what it means to be 'god', or the 'son of god', and are judging all religion through this lens. The Quakers, for example hold that 'there is that of god in everyone' Many forms of tantric Hinduism hold that the ultimate state of being is realizing one's unity with god. The Sufi's (and some parts of non fundamentalist Islam) claim that one's experience of god is personal and cannot…
What proof do any of these religions have?
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#148I would recommend you to grab your saved money, get a plane to south america and try Ayahuasca in the amazonian jungle, you will find purpose.
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#149Changing cities, changing the people i was hanging out/living with (i was not enjoying their company) helped me a lot. I was "hanging out" with them, because i was living with them. Packed all my bag(s) and headed out.
My next aim is to earn enough money to change countries.
Re: Suicidal Software Developer
#150Hi,
One of those who found the light. Some suggestions from my experience
1. This is a temporary phase. It will take time, but you will get over it, get better, and feel a lot better. Hold on, with hope. You will have someone nice to go home to and have your own children. She was not the last person on Earth. If not her then there will be someone else.
2. Get professional help. Please, get professional help. Go to a psychiatrist and follow their advise. Its normal. Everyone does it. And it works.
3. Don't go public with how you are feeling at your workplace. If you are not performing your best, that's OK.
4. Keep your job. At least until you have already found another one. It is one of the things forcing you to go through your daily routine and giving you an opportunity to interact with other human beings.
5. Its ok to grieve. Its part of being healed. You are already doing the right things by asking for help. Hang in there and you will find a purpose which will get you back on track.
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