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I do not remember my life and it's fine

aethermug.com

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Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#141

Post by vaylian »

> As a matter of fact, spatial memory is the closest thing I have to an "index" for the musty file cabinet of my episodic memories. If I can remember where something happened, there is a good chance I can remember many more details about what happened.

This. Information retrieval typically happens based on an impulse. For many people the impulse can be a question like "what did you do yesterday?". But some people organise their memories differently. From reading the article it is clear that the author does not have a bad memory. Their memory is just wired/optimized differently. The biggest problem is other neurotypical people who, without bad intentions, assume that it is easy to answer a question, that is framed around time.

Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#144

Post by frereubu »

OptionOfT wrote: post #10

This is exactly what I experience, and for me, this is a huge issue when it comes to 'selling myself', whether it is in an interview, or writing a self-assessment for a review. And just like the author, I couldn't answer questions about hard problems that I've solved, until someone pointed out a moment where I did something they would call an achievements. Now, at that moment I have the right references. It is still…

If you have excellent spatial memory, have you heard of memory palaces? Might be interesting to try and construct an "achievements" memory palace for when you need to answer similar questions in the future. (This isn't a problem for me, just thought it might be an interesting avenue to pursue).

Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#146

Post by gnat »

lll-o-lll wrote: post #43
gnat wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Our 23-year old son died two and a half years ago and while I'm sure SDAM helped me to get through the horrible immediate times, it's quite sad to be without a lot of detailed memories and events that I can look back on to relive the good times. On the whole, I'd rather have had a functioning episodic memory. (and my son)

I’m so sorry to hear that. Thank you for sharing it — you remind me to make the most of the moments we have. I need to go hug my kids.

Definitely do that. Nothing can replace your kids or take the loss away, but it's bloody good to know that I always ended each call and farewell with "love you" and he knew from my words and actions that I loved him. I have regrets but I'm glad that's not one of them.

Good luck with the wild ride of parenthood!

Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#147

Post by sensanaty »

OptionOfT wrote: post #10

This is exactly what I experience, and for me, this is a huge issue when it comes to 'selling myself', whether it is in an interview, or writing a self-assessment for a review. And just like the author, I couldn't answer questions about hard problems that I've solved, until someone pointed out a moment where I did something they would call an achievements. Now, at that moment I have the right references. It is still…

I genuinely hate to be that guy lol, but I've found LLMs great for this.

I've been updating my resume lately and I've had some LLMs create scripts to call Jira + Linear APIs to fetch all tickets I've had any involvement in and to analyze it. It hallucinates details all the time of course, but I can at least get a rough idea of the things I worked on, cause I'm the same as you and forget immediately what I worked on last week.

Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#148

Post by joey_spaztard »

pfdietz wrote: post #81

Wait... so those with SDAM are never subject to intrusive thoughts about some hideously embarrassing event that happened decades ago, and that only they would have remembered? What a blessing.

I typed my intrusive thoughts in to a document and analysed them. It turns out I had a hundred of them.

It really helped to write up why they don't matter now, such as "I was a child when that happened, I'm now an adult who knows how to handle that."

My brain thinks that a physical piece of paper is much more authoritative than a thought in my head and makes less effort to remember things that are documented so having twenty page booklet that I can get out if I need it seemed to help.

Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#149

Post by krzat »

OptionOfT wrote: post #10

This is exactly what I experience, and for me, this is a huge issue when it comes to 'selling myself', whether it is in an interview, or writing a self-assessment for a review. And just like the author, I couldn't answer questions about hard problems that I've solved, until someone pointed out a moment where I did something they would call an achievements. Now, at that moment I have the right references. It is still…

I don't quite get the connection between ADHD and feeling like a spectator.

Re: I do not remember my life and it's fine

#150

Post by drcongo »

OptionOfT wrote: post #10

This is exactly what I experience, and for me, this is a huge issue when it comes to 'selling myself', whether it is in an interview, or writing a self-assessment for a review. And just like the author, I couldn't answer questions about hard problems that I've solved, until someone pointed out a moment where I did something they would call an achievements. Now, at that moment I have the right references. It is still…

Aphantasic here and this article describes my experience perfectly too. I've wondered a lot about why my brother is able to recall entire sequences of memory from our childhoods and I've got, at best, snapshots that aren't exactly mental images, just stuff I think I know happened.
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