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The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

phys.org

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Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#141

Post by XorNot »

pixl97 wrote: post #108
rexpop wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

We decry "demands" when we should acknowledge "dependencies;" kids won't properly compile without their needs met.

The question here is one of alignment. I child may think "I need to eat right now" but that doesn't necessarily mean the "right now" part is correct. Open world problems are difficult to define, even the word 'properly' you use has a vast amount of interpretability as to what you believe the 'proper' outcome should be.

There is absolutely no parent who's problem is a child who thinks "I need to eat right now".

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#142

Post by dabbledash »

caesil wrote: post #107
getpost wrote: post #54

> the researchers say that children may be "evolutionarily primed" to expect exceptionally high levels of physical contact and care, What strikes me here is the phrase, "exceptionally high levels." I imagine children need a "normal" level of care; it's only "exceptionally high" in comparison to the deprived state of family systems in these degenerate times. I often reflect on the understanding in Attachment Theory, w…

[flagged]

Women in the past did not spend virtually all their time caregiving. That isn't even an option until a society has reached a high level of affluence and ease.

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#143

Post by huytersd »

caesil wrote: post #107
getpost wrote: post #54

> the researchers say that children may be "evolutionarily primed" to expect exceptionally high levels of physical contact and care, What strikes me here is the phrase, "exceptionally high levels." I imagine children need a "normal" level of care; it's only "exceptionally high" in comparison to the deprived state of family systems in these degenerate times. I often reflect on the understanding in Attachment Theory, w…

[flagged]

Women really should. The fact that women don’t want to is a entirely different discussion still pertaining to degeneracy.

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#144

Post by em-bee »

toomuchtodo wrote: post #129
em-bee wrote: post #127

Earlier quoted context omitted.

it is one thing to ask someone who doesn't want to deal with kids for help taking care of them, but quite another to expect them to tolerate kids and behave in a manner that gives the kids space they need. (like not smoking near kids, etc) in a city i can't choose my neighbors, but some neighbors don't like kids and will complain if they are to noisy because they are playing soccer in the yard, to the point that they…

Agreed. Kids need the space to develop as you mentioned, and it’s somewhat trivial to determine where to live to avoid children using granular census and school availability data if desired.

it’s somewhat trivial to determine where to live to avoid children

given the discussions of how much more housing most cities need, i actually think this is not trivial at all. not wanting to live near children pretty much comes down to not living near people.

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#145

Post by concordDance »

I wish the article mentioned the proportion of cries (or other metric such as time being held) answered by non-parents/older siblings. That's the more important figure than number of different caregivers (where 10 people each holding the baby for half an hour total would count).

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#146

Post by danr4 »

stareatgoats wrote: post #20

We can only move forward, not backward. The hunter-gatherer existence is often endowed with some notion of pristine, peaceful existence in harmony with nature, which is likely far from the actual truth. That said, I for one find many aspects (but not all!) of the present situation unsatisfactory, where the needs of macroeconomy and national priorities supersedes many of our most basic needs as humans. This article co…

I look at if from a logical lens rather than a romantic one. Modern lifestyle outpaced our human evolution.

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#147

Post by Erratic6576 »

kaskakokos wrote: post #109
getpost wrote: post #54

> the researchers say that children may be "evolutionarily primed" to expect exceptionally high levels of physical contact and care, What strikes me here is the phrase, "exceptionally high levels." I imagine children need a "normal" level of care; it's only "exceptionally high" in comparison to the deprived state of family systems in these degenerate times. I often reflect on the understanding in Attachment Theory, w…

I think the word "exceptionally" arises when comparing with other animals, the amount of effort a human child needs from its parents and family until an advanced age is unprecedented in other terrestrial companions.

Yeah maybe that’s why women live longer in order to help with the exhausting process of raising their grandchildren [1].

We love to take care of babies, regardless of (or maybe because of) how clingy and dependent they are.

From an Evolutionary point of view, This relationship between needy babies and abnegated caregivers might have given rise to a complementary schimogenesis according to Gregory Bateson, in which babies might have evolved to be more and more dependent, because having more and more invested caregivers produces fitter offspring.

Parenthood is a self-inflicted sabotage and I cannot understand how come there are so many parents bearing children worldwide.

1. The Gardener and the Carpenter: Alison Gopnik, Erin Bennett: 9781536617832

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#149

Post by Erratic6576 »

secondcoming wrote: post #118
kaskakokos wrote: post #109

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think the word "exceptionally" arises when comparing with other animals, the amount of effort a human child needs from its parents and family until an advanced age is unprecedented in other terrestrial companions.

Indeed, it always a source of surprise to me that human babies will cry regardless of the situation, whereas the offspring of other animals seem to have an instinct to remain quiet while the mother is not about, or there's a perceived danger.

Unlike kittens and superior animals, ape babies are not meant to be abandoned at any point, under no circumstances. They are meant to be carried around by their mothers or substitute relatives, clinging to them, so their sudden whimsical needs can be catered to immediately, or else you run the risk of developing an insecure attachment relationship.

Google images for “monkey attached mother”.

Re: The key to mother and child well-being may be many caregivers

#150

Post by [deleted] »

em-bee wrote: post #144
toomuchtodo wrote: post #129

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Agreed. Kids need the space to develop as you mentioned, and it’s somewhat trivial to determine where to live to avoid children using granular census and school availability data if desired.

it’s somewhat trivial to determine where to live to avoid children given the discussions of how much more housing most cities need, i actually think this is not trivial at all. not wanting to live near children pretty much comes down to not living near people.

[deleted]
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