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Being OK with not being extraordinary

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Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#141

Post by rvn1045 »

remar wrote: post #140
rvn1045 wrote: post #86

The internet has made everyone feel inadequate as it's easy to compare yourself to people you see on the internet. Couple of things to keep in mind if your comparing yourself: 1. There aren't as many uber successful people out there as the internet makes it seem. It's far fewer than you think. Lets take a simple example of dudes who go to the gym and are strong. Instagram makes it seem like all dudes bench press 400…

Well, did you train at commercial gyms or powerlifting/weightlifting gyms? What if the lifters just happened to be on high volume blocks, or tapering for a meet whenever you visited?

Yeah this is mostly at commercial gyms and there are a lot more at powerlifting/weightlifting gyms for sure. But even there there aren't as many as you would expect. It's probably more common to bench 300, but never seen anyone do a 405 lbs squat atg even at a powerlifting gym.

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#142

Post by qrybam »

Personal anecdote - I became very good at one activity early on in life. This was at the expense of other things such as education and a social life. The dedication required to reach a high level of skill, and the journey overall was great fun and taught me a lot about what it takes to reach the top.

What impact has this had on me? It opened a lot of doors for me early on. Ultimately I faced a decision, do I pursue a single thing to its sharpest point, or do I widen my range and create my own category to become sharp in?

There is something deeply rewarding in being a master of one trade. But becoming a jack of all trades offers a different kind of reward which I feel is more sustainable (at least in my case).

I have a deep affinity towards people who have pushed the boundaries in some area of their life, and feel very lucky to have experienced the same.

Which path would I pick? Jack of all.

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#143

Post by m0zg »

Just work in a couple of prominent research labs, like I did. You'll be quickly disabused of the notion that you're in any way "extraordinary". At best you can say that you know more than other people in your particular niche. But then you have to concede that other people know more than you do in their niche. There are, however, real freaks out there who know more than you in any niche they decide they need to know something in. What takes you year takes them hours. What takes you hours takes no effort at all - it's immediately obvious. Some of them are humble about this, some aren't humble at all. It can be fascinating or demoralizing, depending on how attached you are to the false notion of your "extraordinarity". Unfortunately for humanity there are only very few of such people. I can't help but think that this is how human mind is supposed to be, and the rest of us are just deficient.

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#145

Post by mbar84 »

rvn1045 wrote: post #86

The internet has made everyone feel inadequate as it's easy to compare yourself to people you see on the internet. Couple of things to keep in mind if your comparing yourself: 1. There aren't as many uber successful people out there as the internet makes it seem. It's far fewer than you think. Lets take a simple example of dudes who go to the gym and are strong. Instagram makes it seem like all dudes bench press 400…

I remember feeling particularly inadequate when watching Google IO presentations in 2018. All these teams of highly payed engineers presenting the work of a year or more within a few days. Not a healthy thing to compare oneself to.

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#146

Post by ip26 »

rvn1045 wrote: post #86

The internet has made everyone feel inadequate as it's easy to compare yourself to people you see on the internet. Couple of things to keep in mind if your comparing yourself: 1. There aren't as many uber successful people out there as the internet makes it seem. It's far fewer than you think. Lets take a simple example of dudes who go to the gym and are strong. Instagram makes it seem like all dudes bench press 400…

3. The successful people you are comparing yourself to are often older than you. Who knows if you'll wind up as successful as them, but I'm pretty sure many of them would trade it all just to be young again.

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#147

Post by lowiqengineer »

rvn1045 wrote: post #86

The internet has made everyone feel inadequate as it's easy to compare yourself to people you see on the internet. Couple of things to keep in mind if your comparing yourself: 1. There aren't as many uber successful people out there as the internet makes it seem. It's far fewer than you think. Lets take a simple example of dudes who go to the gym and are strong. Instagram makes it seem like all dudes bench press 400…

> There aren't as many uber successful people out there as the internet makes it seem.

I live in a city with two elite universities (guess which one). They're literally all around me.

Getting into either of those is my definition of "uber successful", with many of them being more successful at 17 than I'll ever be in my life!

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#148

Post by hycaria »

neutronicus wrote: post #9

I appreciate what you wrote, OP - moderating my ambition is both essential to my mental health and an ongoing process. I do not exaggerate when I say that in my case I believe the stakes are life and death. One thing that has helped me a lot to find peace here has been becoming a father. Culturally, it comes with a kind of license to finally just accept mediocrity which I find freeing. Bills are paid, I can watch my…

Child rearing does not last forever though, and if you practiced nothing for those 20-30 years you will fall into the same traps again. Accepting mediocrity is not freeing when it leads to giving up all efforts (And that’s a recurrent scheme)

Re: Being OK with not being extraordinary

#150

Post by O_H_E »

KallDrexx wrote: post #113
ZainRiz wrote: post #32

> creators can get just as much value out of creating their original content and connecting with like-minded people. Strong resonance here. I recently became more prolific about blogging, and this was the mindset that helps me stay consistent. I find that the mere act of writing an essay helps me clarify my own thoughts, and the essay often changes in the process. As a recent example, I started writing out about how…

This is the reason I started working towards getting better a note taking. Describing what I'm learning in my own words may help me retain the information better. I don't publish it because I don't know anyone cares but I feel like it helps myself regardless, and keeping them searchable seems like it should pay off at some point.

Any notes :) or resources on note-taking you can share? I am currently studying and have been struggling in that area.
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