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The Loneliness Epidemic

melmagazine.com

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141–150 of 337 posts

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#141

Post by Balero »

arcadeparade wrote: post #64
mox1 wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You think that today in 2019, we spend more time at "work" than at any other time in history? That's just false. Over the 20th century here, work hours have slashed in half. Henry Ford introduced the 5 day work week in 1926, prior to that it was 6. You think the average farmer in the late 1800's worked 40-50 hours? What about the average coal miner, or factory worker?

You're not thinking on a long enough timescale. Hunter gatherers only worked 10 hours a week :)

They only hunter/gathered for that long.

How much time was spent in meetings, how much time preparing food, fixing clothes, patrolling territory, scouting things out, making home improvements etc.

If the modern person only worked for food, then I think a few hours a week would suffice.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#142

Post by dang »

tictoc wrote: post #28
radcon wrote: post #17

At the risk of sounding like a crazy hippy, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that some kind of subsistence-based neighborhoods would be a great option for dealing with this problem. Not only would it provide some relief from the feeling of being shackled to bullshit jobs for life if you don't want to starve to death, it would also help foster much stronger communities.

go back to your farm you dirty hippie

Please don't do this here.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#143

Post by bitL »

Solitude is beneficial for an individual and dangerous for society. Loneliness is dangerous for individual but beneficial for economy. My guess is that "solitude" is the one sounding alarm, not loneliness.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#144

Post by bitL »

davidw wrote: post #139

I miss the social aspects of living in Italy. It just felt easier to connect with people there. People are kind of weird and standoffish here in the US, and in some cases feel a bit fake. If you ask if someone wants to grab a beer (or spritz/wine/whatever) in Italy, and they respond enthusiastically, it seems there's a good chance they'll try and make it happen.

Try Germany or Switzerland for a year, you'd be super happy to get back to US ;-)

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#145

Post by fromthestart »

gordaco wrote: post #106
dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

All of this is 100% correct. In particular: the amount of choices that have become "career killers" and therefore unacceptable is terrifying. Choose a degree that appeals to you, where you will learn what you like, instead of one which acts as a stepping stone for a higher paying job? Even in countries with sane tuition prices (read: not the US) plenty of people will blame you, and that decision in particular, for an…

>Choose a degree that appeals to you, where you will learn what you like, instead of one which acts as a stepping stone for a higher paying job?

>Become pregnant, and/or plan to work fewer hours for some time to take care of your kids or any older relative?

>Stay in your job for 15 years because you like the people, the work itself or some particular perk?

>However, lately the tension between those two is so high that any small decision towards living the life you want to live may very well end in financial misery for the rest of your life.

Are you expecting society to reward you for making ultimately selfish choices aimed at maximizing only your own personal happiness?

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#146

Post by tsss »

mox1 wrote: post #54
arvinsim wrote: post #47

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> The Job has completely taken over as a driving force in evaluating choices. Not to mention most of our time. People nowadays spend far more time at work than ever.

You think that today in 2019, we spend more time at "work" than at any other time in history? That's just false. Over the 20th century here, work hours have slashed in half. Henry Ford introduced the 5 day work week in 1926, prior to that it was 6. You think the average farmer in the late 1800's worked 40-50 hours? What about the average coal miner, or factory worker?

The average farmer definitely worked less than 40 hours. During harvest season it was more than that no doubt but overall the time spent on work was less and more diverse. It was only with industrialization and capitalism that work took over such an enormous amount of our time. At the beginning of the 20th century, people fought back hard to get the amenities like 40h week and sick leave that make work bearable today. It certainly wasn't Henry Ford who introduced the 5 day work week. It was the workers who protested for it while people like Henry Ford sent strike breakers and police with machine guns to mow them down.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#147

Post by aszantu »

devtul wrote: post #128
gordaco wrote: post #106

Earlier quoted context omitted.

All of this is 100% correct. In particular: the amount of choices that have become "career killers" and therefore unacceptable is terrifying. Choose a degree that appeals to you, where you will learn what you like, instead of one which acts as a stepping stone for a higher paying job? Even in countries with sane tuition prices (read: not the US) plenty of people will blame you, and that decision in particular, for an…

Seems to be more a problem of expectations than anything else, people are too focused on being successful than being happy, on having it all. I would gleefully take a pay cut to have a 35h work week _if my wage still allows me to eat out once 3x a week_, but I will work 40h + commute and feel always exhausted until I get there. See how easy is to fall on that trap.

why not make it a habit to talk to a stranger on the commuting train?

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#148

Post by iliketosleep »

gordaco wrote: post #106
dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

All of this is 100% correct. In particular: the amount of choices that have become "career killers" and therefore unacceptable is terrifying. Choose a degree that appeals to you, where you will learn what you like, instead of one which acts as a stepping stone for a higher paying job? Even in countries with sane tuition prices (read: not the US) plenty of people will blame you, and that decision in particular, for an…

> However, lately the tension between those two is so high that any small decision towards living the life you want to live may very well end in financial misery for the rest of your life.

This is definitely an uncomfortable truth that isn't talked about very often, and the information age seems to exacerbate it.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#149

Post by davidw »

bitL wrote: post #144
davidw wrote: post #139

I miss the social aspects of living in Italy. It just felt easier to connect with people there. People are kind of weird and standoffish here in the US, and in some cases feel a bit fake. If you ask if someone wants to grab a beer (or spritz/wine/whatever) in Italy, and they respond enthusiastically, it seems there's a good chance they'll try and make it happen.

Try Germany or Switzerland for a year, you'd be super happy to get back to US ;-)

Lived in Austria for a couple years... it was hard to say though. I didn't speak the language there, so people were friendly, but obviously it kind of limited my interactions to anglophones or locals with the desire to have English speaking friends.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#150

Post by tempsy »

dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

I don't think that can explain everything. As far as I understand, cultures where family is highly valued (Latin America, some parts Asia) say they are happier despite being relatively less well off than richer countries.
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