Fired? Speak No Evil

A way to reduce burn rate could have included slightly less lavish gifts.

Not technically, not in spirit, not in any way related to the 1st amendment. Have so few people actually bothered to learn even a little about the 1st amendment? You can read the entire first amendment several times and then ponder it a little in just a few minutes, because it's very short. In fact, I'll paste the entire text:

  Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of
  religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or
  abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the
  right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition
  the Government for a redress of grievances.

  Congress shall make no law…abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press

The article stated the author would have to give up his lifetime right to make "any negative or disparaging statements (orally or in writing) about the Company or its stockholders, directors, officers, employees, products, services or business practices". That's a huge thing. Let's imagine the company you worked for starts selling organs of little orphans for transplant. You are not allowed to criticize them for that. Let's say they start a fracking operation that contaminates the water of millions of people. Or irresponsibly build a nuclear reactor that melts down a week later. Imagine one of the stockholders is Carl Icahn. You'll never be able to criticize him again. Or Donald Trump. Can you imagine never being able to make fun of his hair? Imagine then your cable company buys one share of the company you worked for. Now you can't criticize them if your TV goes out because they are a shareholder. Imagine your ex-wife learns about your contract and buys one share.

You get the idea.

I speak ill of them all the time. Not about their impressive infrastructure and engineering, or the scores of brilliant people I had the privilege to work with. No, it was more my experience with the corporate culture and the pervasive games of "power politics" that anybody who wasn't a manager was constantly subject to. Unfortunately I ended up in a position to be the patsy for a director's bad decisions, to make a long story short.

Indeed, I was asked to sign an agreement in exchange for money, and because of the timing of things (newborn baby 2.5 weeks prior) I needed the money more than I needed the freedom to speak my mind about the situation. And it really wasn't very much money, just like in the linked article.

However, despite sending the signed agreement certified mail, the money never showed up, their HR department claims it was never received, and the money didn't end up mattering so much as I was fielding offers within a month and began my current position in short order.

Since then I've received several letters from them, asking for my signature on various things and I refuse - There's simply nothing they can do to me. But I know quite well that I'm lucky. I've got a skill set and experience that puts me in demand, and anybody who asks why I was fired can get a simple answer: "Here's my LinkedIn profile, take note of the slew of recommendations I got within a week of my termination."

(I will add, my subsequent contact with their HR and legal department did have me worried about things for a while - not to mention various thinly-veiled verbal threats made by my former director before and during my termination, in case you're wondering just what kind of politics and culture made me dislike the place)