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How to get the most out of your 1:1s

erik.wiffin.com

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Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#131

Post by Spellman »

mfrommil wrote: post #92
tinkertamper wrote: post #9

I used to have a boss who’d ask me to rate my company satisfaction with the company 1-10 at every 1:1. This always struck me as one of the laziest/misguided management moves I’ve encountered, and I’m sure he felt it was both accurate and clever. If you manage people, and don’t understand that basic power dynamics will always trump encouragements for “openness”, you are naive at best and willfully blind at worst.

Heard one of the Warby Parker founders speak once, and he mentioned a similar process at their company. I believe once a week all employees anonymously rated their satisfaction 1-10. He was very bought into the thought that "happy employees = productive employees". He said the weekly ratings was a very powerful tool for the executive team to get a feel for how the team was feeling, and if they could push harder or ne…

A key difference though is that was anonymous (safe) and aggregated (large sample size).

Giving a 1-10 rating directly to your supervisor is a completely different thing and the number is tainted by all sorts of other dynamics.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#132

Post by something2 »

gorgoiler wrote: post #14

Completely unimportant, but anyone else call them one to ones ? Where did this one on one thing come from? A one on one is a boxing match or a schoolyard fight, not an open chat. 8:2:1 is a ratio of cocktail ingredients. 16:9 is an aspect ratio. 1:7 is a steep hill to climb. To , by , and in respectively. The latter two would be weird choices but at least they’d be consistent with the syntax of x:y. “on” though?! Whe…

I'm no etymology professor, but if I had to guess it's related to the phrase tête-à-tête (literally head to head) in French. Kinda makes sense to me that it went from tête-à-tête -> head to head -> face to face -> one on one. Why it's written as "1:1", I haven't the faintest.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#133

Post by scarface74 »

hvidgaard wrote: post #121
lghh wrote: post #116

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I would be totally fine with someone telling me in a one on one that they are comfortable with their current position and would like to stay there. My expectation at that point would be that we would work on growth within that position. How can we (you and I) do the best job we can maximizing your impact and output where you currently are and make you the best version of what you want to be. Honestly, any manager who…

I like growing employees, but I'd be lying if it said I didn't put immense value on the great employees that are content where they are with what they're doing. They're dependable and they mean I have some form of "old guard" that really knows a system inside out without going through documentation or experimenting. That is very valuable.

That is very valuable until that employee needs to find another job and find their skills aren’t marketable.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#134

Post by scarface74 »

songzme wrote: post #114

I really struggle with 1:1s primarily because: 1. Do you want career growth? No, and its hard to tell that to my manager. More growth leads to more responsibility, which is more stress. I'm happy where I am and I don't want promotions. I'm afraid to tell my manager that, because which manager wants an unambitious engineer? There was someone like that on our team and he was laid off in the last layoff round, so I have…

I agree with not wanting a promotion, I’m perfectly fine with where I am compensation wise and job wise.

But yes, I keep up with the new shiny projects and keep my resume current. The tides are always shifting in tech. Managers change, companies get acquired, go under etc. It’s my responsibility to myself and my family to keep myself competitive in the market.

I’m not going to do that by not staying in sync with the market.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#135

Post by mym1990 »

scarface74 wrote: post #133
hvidgaard wrote: post #121

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I like growing employees, but I'd be lying if it said I didn't put immense value on the great employees that are content where they are with what they're doing. They're dependable and they mean I have some form of "old guard" that really knows a system inside out without going through documentation or experimenting. That is very valuable.

That is very valuable until that employee needs to find another job and find their skills aren’t marketable.

Its up to the employee to continue to build marketable skills, not the employer. If the employee is content in their position, then that's that.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#136

Post by scarface74 »

erikwiffin wrote: post #129
songzme wrote: post #114

I really struggle with 1:1s primarily because: 1. Do you want career growth? No, and its hard to tell that to my manager. More growth leads to more responsibility, which is more stress. I'm happy where I am and I don't want promotions. I'm afraid to tell my manager that, because which manager wants an unambitious engineer? There was someone like that on our team and he was laid off in the last layoff round, so I have…

This is asking a lot from you, but in your situation, I think your goal should be to build up enough of a relationship with your manager that you feel comfortable telling them that, or realize that that's never going to happen at your current company and find a new job. I have reports who have told me that they're happy doing what they're doing. I don't see it as a negative at all - they're employees who are quietly…

That’s good for you. But how good is it for them for you not to inform them of the existential risks of them not getting better at their job and staying marketable? Even if they don’t want a raise? Every industry goes through changes and you should encourage them to stay up to date on those changes instead of just chugging along on the legacy products.

I met two developers in 2016 who had been with the same company for 10 and 17 years respectively maintaining a PowerBuilder app from 1999 running on Sql server 2003.

The company was happy to let them keep chugging along until the company got acquired by venture capital and they said they “no longer wanted to be a software company”. How do you think that worked out for them?

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#137

Post by drdec »

sdevonoes wrote: post #53

My situation is as follows. I joined my current company 1 year ago; my team is composed of 5 people (data scientists, engineers, 1 product manager) and it is within an area (there are like 10 areas, and each area has around 2 to 3 teams). Alongside my team, there is another team in my area. There is only one engineer manager for the whole area (so, like 8 engineers to "manage"). I have 1:1s every 2 weeks with my engi…

> my "career path" is to keep being an IC, doing a good job, not getting too attached to companies... and switch jobs every 3 years or so

THIS is what the 1:1 is for. That is where you communicate to your manager what you need in order to keep from leaving in a few years. You might not get it and leave anyway, but then again, you might. Nothing lost in the trying.*

* I'm not suggesting you frame it as an ultimatum but let them know what you want.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#138

Post by terryf »

songzme wrote: post #114

I really struggle with 1:1s primarily because: 1. Do you want career growth? No, and its hard to tell that to my manager. More growth leads to more responsibility, which is more stress. I'm happy where I am and I don't want promotions. I'm afraid to tell my manager that, because which manager wants an unambitious engineer? There was someone like that on our team and he was laid off in the last layoff round, so I have…

As a manager - I would love it if someone tells me that! This makes my life so much easier!

It means, that I will not have to worry about figuring out a good place for you to grow into. It also means that I will not have to worry about finding a replacement for you after you get promoted.

Hell, if you tell me that I'll do everything I can to give you a raise asap.

Tip: Your manager really, really wants to hear what you really honestly think. Even if it's not a positive thing (and just wanting to continue doing what you're doing is very positive!). It's super hard to guess what people are trying to say because most people don't just tell you straight. Of course there are exceptions - that's probably a sign of a crappy manager. If that's the case, sorry, you can probably find a better job.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#139

Post by polishdude20 »

darkerside wrote: post #95
polishdude20 wrote: post #19

What I don't like is when I as the employer need to take the initiative to do the 1 on 1 and then do it with the feeling like I'm wasting my bosses time.

Have you tried asking your boss what they want out of the meeting?

Yeah, usually says it's for me and I can talk about whatever.

Re: How to get the most out of your 1:1s

#140

Post by gaoshan »

songzme wrote: post #114

I really struggle with 1:1s primarily because: 1. Do you want career growth? No, and its hard to tell that to my manager. More growth leads to more responsibility, which is more stress. I'm happy where I am and I don't want promotions. I'm afraid to tell my manager that, because which manager wants an unambitious engineer? There was someone like that on our team and he was laid off in the last layoff round, so I have…

As a manager I would be fine with this explanation. If you are valuable in the area you are and you don't want to move on that's fine with me. We need someone in that role and you fill it nicely so by all means stay in that role. There should still be plenty of growth opportunity for you if you want it... it doesn't have to come with a title change. Having 100 people that all want promotions that cycle and only 20 slots to promote into is stressful to handle so you not being part of that but still contributing is kind of great.
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