Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

paulefou.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

131–140 of 684 posts

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#131

Post by m_fayer »

throwaway90090 wrote: post #99
gentleman11 wrote: post #82

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Is there a single dating app that doesn’t do that?

No, there isn't. Maybe at the very beginning when people were genuinely entranced by this Internet thing and hadn't figured out the best way to milk loneliness for profit, but now it's all rotten and beyond repair. If you want to meet new people, find yourself new real-life hobbies.

Pre-pandemic, my social life made dating platforms unnecessary. Now? No house or dinner parties full of acquaintances, no clubs or festivals, everyone's clustered into inner-circle friend groups, my employer moved out of the enormous shared office we were in, and on like that. The dating platforms are more necessary than ever.

So, naturally, there's never been a better time than this for some bad-faith behavior and profiteering.

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#133

Post by polote »

jhgb wrote: post #87
polote wrote: post #44

It has always been like that on Tinder. My phone number can't create a new account for example (never receive the confirmation code). That's called shadowban in the case of OP. Bumble started doing the same practices a year ago (which makes sense as they have the same founder) But they are not 100% wrong, Tinder is not here to make people meet each other. They are here to make money and people don't pay because they…

> as soon as they detect non standard behavior they shadowban, people keep seeing profile and keep paying That's called "fraud" in most countries. If you believe that fraud is "not 100% wrong" then I don't know what to say to that.

I was saying it is not 100% wrong to ban people. The fact that the banned people are still paying and dont get their money back clearly look like fraud (even if this is more complex, as Tinder is very smart about how they communicate, they never make you pay to get matches, they make you pay to be able to like more).

But yeah Match group is a fraud company, I've wrote some posts on the topic in the past

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#134

Post by decafninja »

tata71 wrote: post #113
alias_neo wrote: post #107

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've never done online dating, met my wife the old-fashioned way, but, it sounds like you're saying the network is making the choice of who should be matched/together, before they get the chance to decide for themselves? If that's true, how anyone thinks that isn't totally fucked is beyond me. I mean, I'm seriously, deeply concerned by this notion more than the usual privacy, data etc that big tech concerns me with,…

Yes, Tinder swiping is bracketed by implied desirable ness of the profile. They even tell you when you're "doing well".

Curious what the algorithm would be to measure "desireableness". Computer vision on the photos (i.e. measure facial symmetry?) plus the number of other people who have expressed interest in you?

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#135

Post by jonnybgood »

wayoutthere wrote: post #77
polote wrote: post #44

It has always been like that on Tinder. My phone number can't create a new account for example (never receive the confirmation code). That's called shadowban in the case of OP. Bumble started doing the same practices a year ago (which makes sense as they have the same founder) But they are not 100% wrong, Tinder is not here to make people meet each other. They are here to make money and people don't pay because they…

As a woman, Tinder is fine if you wanna find a fuck buddy and don’t take it seriously. I see a lot of people (men and women) get wrapped up in the swipe game and that’s really not how it works. You can’t take anything that happens on that platform personally. Unfortunately, rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive”. If you want tinder to work for you consistently as a man, get your personal hygiene in order and…

Why is that rule unfortunate? Why would someone date or hookup with someone they're not physically attracted to?

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#137

Post by sebastianconcpt »

polote wrote: post #91
wayoutthere wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

As a woman, Tinder is fine if you wanna find a fuck buddy and don’t take it seriously. I see a lot of people (men and women) get wrapped up in the swipe game and that’s really not how it works. You can’t take anything that happens on that platform personally. Unfortunately, rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive”. If you want tinder to work for you consistently as a man, get your personal hygiene in order and…

> rule #1 on tinder is “be physically attractive” For guys it used to be right, now rule #1 is more "be super attractive" or "be attractive and don't have standard" For girls rule #1 is "be a girl"

[flagged]

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#138

Post by svalee »

999900000999 wrote: post #106

By far the best part is they didn't automatically cancel his subscription. What a horrible company, if you've banned my account that's fine but cancel the subscription and refund my money. If y'all haven't looked at it yet, read up on the FCC's filing against Match. They knowingly prompt up tons of fake profiles, to get you engaged. Horrifically this has lead to romance scams being the number one source of fraud in t…

Yeah, they specifically mention that at the bottom of the screen[1] when they ban you

[1] https://paulefou.com/cancel.jpg

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#139

Post by webdoodle »

999900000999 wrote: post #106

By far the best part is they didn't automatically cancel his subscription. What a horrible company, if you've banned my account that's fine but cancel the subscription and refund my money. If y'all haven't looked at it yet, read up on the FCC's filing against Match. They knowingly prompt up tons of fake profiles, to get you engaged. Horrifically this has lead to romance scams being the number one source of fraud in t…

To take it a step further, throw your phone away. I've been digital overseer/fear machine free for almost 2 years now, and can definitively say it's the best decision a person can make for their mental well being.

Re: Tinder just permabanned me or the problem with big tech

#140

Post by emacsen »

999900000999 wrote: post #106

By far the best part is they didn't automatically cancel his subscription. What a horrible company, if you've banned my account that's fine but cancel the subscription and refund my money. If y'all haven't looked at it yet, read up on the FCC's filing against Match. They knowingly prompt up tons of fake profiles, to get you engaged. Horrifically this has lead to romance scams being the number one source of fraud in t…

I don't know what happened in this situation, but generally refunding money for TOS violations is a bad idea. Let me explain why.

Imagine that Alice runs a service where you can send people greeting cards.

Bob decides he's going to use this service to cause trouble and instead of normal greeting cards, he sends people messages with hate speech, such as their race, their religion, says he hoped they get cancer, and so on.

Alice sees Bob is doing this and it violates her TOS on the service, so she cancels his account.

Should Bob get a refund?

If he does, then Bob will have used Alice's system to do bad things in a way that actually costs him nothing. He's costing Alice administrative fees and regular costs.

That's why ToS violations should generally not trigger a refund.

Post reply on HN