Ask HN: Words of encouragement for someone lost in life?

Yes, that is true, he acknowledges that he doesn't know what reality "really is" otherwise.

Consider Emmanuel Kant's Rose Colored glasses for a moment before dismissing Hoffman's ideas outright. This idea has been brushed against before, I find it very interesting and supplies a lot of fertile earth to till.

If you would like to engage further, I recommend Curt Jaimungal's multi-hour conversation with Dr. Hoffman on his podcast "Theories of Everything".

The link to his youtube video of the discussion is here, it's available on the podcast RSS feeds too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmieNQH7Q4w

I was in a similar state at times in my early 20s. My advice is...

#1 Don't harm yourself. You are in a rough patch. It will be over at some point. Life is really very hard some times, but not all the time. Some times it is really fun and lovely. Those times will come again.

#2 Whenever you do something (work on a project/spend time with people/walk in nature/check in with social media) ask yourself do you feel better, healthier, happier, stronger after this activity or do you feel worse. Focus on those people and activities that "fill your bucket". To the greatest degree possible avoid people and actives that empty your bucket.

#3 Don't worry about it too much. Take it easy on yourself and be patient with yourself. Do worry too much about social media profiles. They aren't real. To the degree they are real, they are not the full story. Just try to have a good time where ever you can. Be nice to yourself.

I agree, and I allow for that possibility in my comment.

In my opinion the best bet is to choose an activity and do it. You will naturally socialize with other like minded individuals, have some fun, maybe even learn a useful skill, and you will for certain feel good doing it :)

People (generalizing here) are attracted to happy, engaged, healthy people. Attractiveness markers are health markers. If you find yourself with an internal voice telling you you are bad or wrong or not good enough, may I humbly suggest adopting this mantra in their place: "I can become good at anything."

because you can.

My only advise is to stay the hell away from social media and dating apps. This is by far the most counterproductive measure you could take. While I'm not entirely sure what were the creators' goals for each one, the end result is that they are means for people to fuel their ego and all the post, pictures, videos, likes and comments are just a scaled down version of Dan Bilzerian's social media accounts: it's all a play and the reality has nothing to do with what is being shown. Let's dial the clock back around 20 years when I was in school - I had a good amount of classmates who had rich parents - getting driven to school in brand new G-wagons with personal drivers, 1000+ euro phones while the average monthly salary was around 400 and all that. I aknowledged that we had different social status but that wasn't the reason why I kept a distance from all of them. The truth is there was not a single topic that you could discuss with them. And 20 years later one of two things have happened: they have inherited the leftover from their parents' businesses or their parents can no longer support their lifestyle(kind of a lot to expect from your parents when they are retired). As far as they go however, there is still absolutely nothing to talk to them about.

I'm not going to lie, my life for the past 4 years hasn't been particularly easy, largely due to family issues, but generally it turned out alright, Certainly exceeded my expectations from when I was your age.

I suppose I was always a bit antisocial - never really enjoyed interacting with others, I preferred reading/listening as opposed to writing/talking. That said, the pandemic did cut off pretty much all interactions I had with others and that started getting to me a bit. And I guess it was luck but around july last year I was presented with an opportunity to get a dog. And after meeting the puppy it was settled and it's been one of the best descisions I've ever made and I suggest you give that a thought as well and consider a breed that is known for their intelligence. It's a double edged blade, since clever dogs tend to be a lot more hyperactive and require more attention, it's absolutely astonishing to watch them evaluate and adapt to complex situations. "How the hell did you figure that one out" becomes the norm. At this point I have absolutely no desire to interact with people.

Also as others pointed out - gym.