Earlier quoted context omitted.
Your anecdote rings with how there are many people who hold racist tendencies, but exclude their friends of said race from those tendencies. Essentially when they think 'all X' they mean 'all X besides those whom I know'
Is it racist to have physical preferences that conform to "race"? If I were, for example, to like tall men, and therefore have a preference for men of a race which is stereotypically tall, does that make me racist?
By tendencies I was meaning making jokes like "Having kids is great, you should, unless you're brown. There's enough brown people already"