The last day • Hacker News Board

Re: The last day

#121

Post by chernevik » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 12:33 PM UTC

tptacek wrote: post #69

monochromatic wrote: post #68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Indeed. But maybe it's too late, or maybe I've had one scotch too many... I'm not sure what you're getting at with "I am saying something else that is more subtle than that" though.

I salute you for posting while intoxicated. It works well for me too. It's not that the author of this post is unhappy that his startup failed. It's that he's lost perspective; that you could plausibly write a post thanking the universe for having been in a position to take a shot on the kind of company that makes vanity stickers for itself (note: founder of company w/ vanity stickers, posters, and refrigerator magne…

Of course, when you post intoxicated, you can sometimes sound . . . hostile.

Re: The last day

#122

Post by wamatt » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 12:35 PM UTC

tptacek wrote: post #76

chernevik wrote: post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Fuck you. I daresay my problems are somewhat worse than those of the OP's CEO. He isn't in a divorce, doesn't have kids, does he? And yeah, even if my problems are worse, they're still distinctly First World. It isn't as if I have trouble finding potable water for my kids, or have to worry about teenager "soldiers" raping my daughter. So maybe I too am Entitled. And perhaps I too should just Shut Up. But I don't thin…

Again: it's not that there are people in the world who are worse off. There are always people in the world that are worse off. Most people in the world are much worse off than most Americans. It's that most Americans are worse off than this person. This is startup exceptionalism. It is the intersection between nerd exceptionalism and the myth of the heroic entrepreneur, both of which are virulent memes in our culture…

> it is the right perspective.

Interesting that you offer a subjective moral value judgement, in the language of a universal truth.

Re: The last day

#123

Post by monochromatic » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:04 PM UTC

tptacek wrote: post #83

monochromatic wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Fair enough. And I guess I don't actually disagree with you, not really... there is nothing tragic about a failed startup. But I'm sure it does suck plenty to have your hopes dashed like that.

It sucked when my startup failed in 2001, but in retrospect it isn't close to the worst suckages in my life. Girlfriend breakups were worse. Thanks for listening to me, though. I obviously managed to lose you completely with my original comment. I'll think about how I managed to do that. I probably won't actually learn from it, but I'll take a shot. :)

Entirely my fault. Or scotch's.

Re: The last day

#124

Post by nicholassmith » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:07 PM UTC

tptacek wrote: post #54

The amount of privilege built into this "painful failure" is disquieting. Here's a person whose biggest problem in life appears to be that he's in debt and, for the moment, unemployed. But: he was the CEO of a company funded to the tune of 8xFTE, and can thus almost certainly walk into hundreds of VP/Product Management or Business Development roles immediately, all of which will pay him more than any of his technical…

You know what, you're right on the money and the worst part is with people angrily denouncing you they've forgotten that one of the biggest trends in startups is 'fail fast'. It fails, it sucks, you tried. Either get back on the horse or transition out and go work for one of the myriad companies that'll be hiring.

Re: The last day

#125

Post by icebraining » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:09 PM UTC

Tichy wrote: post #117

chernevik wrote: post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Fuck you. I daresay my problems are somewhat worse than those of the OP's CEO. He isn't in a divorce, doesn't have kids, does he? And yeah, even if my problems are worse, they're still distinctly First World. It isn't as if I have trouble finding potable water for my kids, or have to worry about teenager "soldiers" raping my daughter. So maybe I too am Entitled. And perhaps I too should just Shut Up. But I don't thin…

Your problems hurt simply because you are so sorry for yourself. Get over yourself.

How is that any different from any other emotional pain?

Re: The last day

#126

Post by b1daly » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:14 PM UTC

The comments criticizing the protagonist are somewhat churlish. If someone shares painful emotions with the a comment like "how could they know my pain," he is demonstrating that he has some awareness that his emotions include self pity, that his feelings are subjective. Generally, in the the US anyway, people know that sharing such feelings is not cool. (People start with snarky comments along the lines of "call the waaahbmulance")

The author is trying to buck the huge social pressure against admitting such feelings. Therefore, to ridicule such a person is re-enforcing the paradigms which drive the feelings in the first place.

On a personal note, I have never been comforted in times of unhappiness to have it pointed out that many people have it far worse. I guess if you are someone who derives a sense of well being based on how well you are doing relative to others, being reminded of how much better off you than the hordes of wretched who walk this earth could give you some happiness.

Re: The last day

#127

Post by Tichy » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:21 PM UTC

icebraining wrote: post #125

Tichy wrote: post #117

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Your problems hurt simply because you are so sorry for yourself. Get over yourself.

How is that any different from any other emotional pain?

The difference to me is that one is the pain of realizing "hey, I am not the glorious human being I thought I am" and other pain is caused by real loss. Sorry if I can not sympathize in this case, to me there is just some aspect of humility missing. Of course it is a real pain, too, but it is not the end of the world. Shame about the girl-friend, though.

Re: The last day

#128

Post by [deleted] » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:24 PM UTC

cookiecaper wrote: post #106

robryan wrote: post #40

Earlier quoted context omitted.

They are, they are also different for different people. There is no right answer to whether sacrificing person relationships for company success is worth it.

There is a right answer. As some other commenters are saying, there is an objective right and wrong. If someone trusts and commits to you as fully as they do when they marry you (or common law marry by prolonged cohabitation), there is absolutely no excuse to damage that trust and that love for a selfish satisfaction of running a successful startup. When you enter that type of relationship with someone, you commit, a…

[deleted]

Re: The last day

#129

Post by famo » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:39 PM UTC

ForrestN wrote: post #9

I'm sorry for being negative but I must say this is pretty hard to take. This narrative is cliche in both in form and content. It's painfully melodramatic and offers almost no insight whatsoever. Yes, major losses in any sphere of life can be poignant (in a way this text surely is not). So what? Where's the value?

I thought the same regarding cliche. The themes are too obvious to me: head in hands, lost girlfriend, lingering last look. They're all listed in TV tropes somewhere.

That being said, I'm the guy who cringes when someone sings about their love being like the moon, stars and sun. There are many people out there who aren't as overly sensitive to cliched writing as me. I think it has value for anyone who felt something while reading it, and it looks like many people in the thread did.

I feel a faint shudder of foreboding while reading it, but I think it was the image at the top of the article that caused it. Very desolate.

Re: The last day

#130

Post by paganel » Wed, Nov 21, 2012, 1:54 PM UTC

Tichy wrote: post #117

chernevik wrote: post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Fuck you. I daresay my problems are somewhat worse than those of the OP's CEO. He isn't in a divorce, doesn't have kids, does he? And yeah, even if my problems are worse, they're still distinctly First World. It isn't as if I have trouble finding potable water for my kids, or have to worry about teenager "soldiers" raping my daughter. So maybe I too am Entitled. And perhaps I too should just Shut Up. But I don't thin…

Your problems hurt simply because you are so sorry for yourself. Get over yourself.

> Get over yourself.

I have a deadline and more important stuff to do right now, but seeing your answer and presuming (possibly wrong) that the parent has gone through some sort of "depression", I have to say that these "get over yourself" and "it's all in your head"-type of answers are mightily infuriating. They don't solve anything, they make it worse.

Otherwise, yes, this is a "first world problem".