Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

marketwatch.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

121–130 of 209 posts

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#121

Post by X-Istence »

a-dub wrote: post #109

Every time I encounter venmo whoever has it usually apologizes for it and explains that you can turn the weird social stuff off. If that's the case, then what's the point? Moreover, it demonstrates that the people who made it have weird philosophies on things. What other choices have they made that I don't know of, can't turn off and would disagree with? Square Cash is great, btw. No bloat, very simple, does what you…

IIRC you can in Venmo say that its private and thus turn off the weird social thing per payment:

https://imgur.com/She6BGE

You can also change the default, although that seems to be an option I don't remember having when I first started using the app...

That is located in Settings -> Privacy... although you get a popup saying "You know you can change this per payment, you sure you want to do this" which to me feels weird and pushy.

I agree with Square Cash or other services, instead of Venmo since the whole idea of by default sharing my payments feels weird. Apple Pay works really well too if you and the recipient are both Apple users.

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#122

Post by DSMan195276 »

Paul-ish wrote: post #72
cortesoft wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It is so ridiculous that the comment for a payment would be used against someone. Writing jokes in the 'for' line on a check is a time honored tradition when paying your friends money. I don't want to live in a world where I am not allowed to make jokes because it might get me a visit from the FBI.

Why is it important to put jokes there? I view a check as a pseudo-legal document. Do you slip jokes into the contracts you sign?

I would agree, I don't really understand the logic in this thread. You're literally giving the check to a bank who is then going to have read it and look at what it's for and who you're sending the money too - and part of their job is to decide if it is legitimate, or if they should ask you about it, etc. If you put something extremely suspicious or flat-out illegal in the memo line, I would presume they're obligated to at least report it, or else they could be on the hook if it turns out it was actually true and they let it go with no questions asked.

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#123

Post by rconti »

BookmarkSaver wrote: post #104
rconti wrote: post #98

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I've been told Venmo works exactly like PayPal, which is to say it's a 2 step process to get money from your Venmo account into your actual checking/savings account. So that would make it just as usable as the, what, 20-year-old PayPal, and worse than Square Cash. Am I misinformed?

When I started using Venmo, PayPal was cumbersome to use (I don't even know if it had decent mobile app 6 years ago) and tended to have additional costs. Also the UI pummeled you with all sorts of random information and options, when all anyone wants to do is send $x to y-person as fast as counting cash in your wallet takes. For a group of people sitting in a restaurant, PayPal was (is? I dunno) annoying. Venmo is ef…

Wikipedia's article is very oddly worded, saying

"In March 2015, Square introduced Square Cash for businesses, which includes the ability for individuals, organizations, and business owners to use a unique username to send and receive money, known as a $cashtag"

But for some reason they neglect to point out the pre-for-business component. It actually dates back to 2013:

https://squareup.com/news/introducing-cashtags

I stand corrected, though, because as you note, Venmo predates it by several years. I guess I just had no reason to switch from PayPal until Square Cash came along in 2013 and was even more frictionless. But ultimately, these things are clearly down to network effect.

Oddly, all I can find about the PayPal mobile app is that it was "re-designed" in 2013. Of course, I was using PayPal on a Palm handheld back in ~2000....

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#124

Post by Fnoord »

SilasX wrote: post #82
Fnoord wrote: post #45

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sane defaults, rather. It is annoying how stuff on Facebook is by default shared with "Public", how applications install malware/adware by default, any advertising-related opt-out. Only positive thing I can say is "they're not the only ones". But that doesn't make it right (Whataboutism). Sad truth is, the software developers or the companies hiring them get away with such immoral choices.

>It is annoying how stuff on Facebook is by default shared with "Public", It does? Mine currently defaults to "friends", and I'm pretty sure the default is just "whatever your last choice was" -- if I set my last one to public, then next time the default value is public.

Yes, that's the default when you start (which is bad).

The default is furthermore like you said "whatever your last choice was". Which is bloody annoying. As if some terribly dumb AI is trying to understand what my motive is. If I always post for X, and then make an exception, then I don't want that exception again next time. Why would I? So if I always post "for friends", for example, and then one time I post "for family" then I don't want next time only "for family" but I want it to be what my default is: "for friends". Because my behavior is like that. At the very least I could receive some kind of feedback in the form of a confirmation (because it sees I'm deviating from my normal behavior). Its like if I go to the bakery and always buy hazelnut meringue but then one time I buy a cherry pie cause of some special occasion. I don't want them to assume that next week I'll again take a cherry pie. I want them to be like "oh its that fellow who basically always has hazelnut meringue". Sure, if I'm starting to buy cherry pies regularly it is a different story. But my usage pattern on posts on Facebook was pretty damn clear: 90-99% for friends, rest for family.

Although, yeah, it usually bit me when I mistakenly posted on "friends" instead of "family" which the above example doesn't cover. Though I thankfully didn't use Facebook that much and not that I personally care specifically about Facebook anymore; I removed everything from my Facebook except my friend list, and I won't use it much anymore. I'm also really not sure if I'm alone on this issue or if people are generally annoyed by this behavior. I assumed the latter but your post suggests otherwise.

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#127

Post by shmerl »

u90g4u8904 wrote: post #120

People who like the social feature of venmo: Can you explain why you enjoy monitoring financial transactions between your friends? I'm genuinely perplexed. Is this just a new norm that's emerging in our culture? In my circle of friends, this behavior would be, at least, uninteresting, and at most, intrusive.

Sounds like snooping feature.

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#128

Post by X-Istence »

matte_black wrote: post #62
eagsalazar2 wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This!! Why why why do people even like Venmo? It is such a bad product and the basic premise of social payments is just totally nuts.

I’ll tell you one reason why, and maybe your curiosity will lead you down further rabbit holes. I use Venmo exclusively for sending money to girls from Tinder. If you look at my stream, you’ll see transactions sending money to tons of babes, often with suggestive comments. Other girls sometimes see this, and decide they too want in on the action. Pretty great what giving out some dollars on the internet can do for yo…

So you are a sugar daddy...

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#129

Post by X-Istence »

hoffbrau99 wrote: post #78
owly wrote: post #61

Wow. Why the hell would anyone use Venmo?

It is a cultural/generational thing. Millenials don't think twice about this. They are shocked that anyone would care. Non-millennials are shocked that anyone would share their financials publicly. We're all shocked at each other's behavior.

Excuse me... but as a millennial, and knowing many other millennials that also care, we do absolutely care.

There is a long list of people that I know that don't use Venmo because of the "social" crap. Please don't try to brush this as a "millennials don't care".

Re: People using Venmo to spy on cheating spouses

#130

Post by musage »

bduerst wrote: post #106
smacktoward wrote: post #74

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> It may not be for you, but people love social media People also love heroin and alcohol and tobacco. People love lots of things that are terrible for them.

People also love exercise, healthy food, and sleep. I don't think payments is something that is social worthy, but comparing them to chemically-addicting substances is a little absurd.

That people like something doesn't mean it's good for them, or even makes them happy: anything that some people really like and that is undoubtedly harmful can serve to prove that point. It doesn't put social media and heroin "in the same ballpark", it doesn't even say social media is harmful, it just says the fact that some people like it isn't saying a lot in itself. (I might add, especially not when it comes in the form of "you don't love it but people love it".)
Post reply on HN