Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

But life had other plans

danlebrero.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

111–120 of 247 posts

Re: But life had other plans

#111

Post by royjacobs »

gonzo41 wrote: post #62
verifex wrote: post #50

Wife and I had an unlikely pregnancy ourselves. We tried for possibly 8 years with no luck, finally we gave in and started the process to do in vitro with entailed lots of tests and everything. Then, the day before we were scheduled to start the process (during xmas no less) and lay down a lot of $$$ for the procedure, wife takes a pregnancy test and shockingly, it indicates positive. Kid was born healthy and happy.…

I'm really happy you saved a ton of money and got what you wanted. IVF is not only mega costly, it's also a brutal roller coaster of emotions for all involved.

Unless you live in a country like The Netherlands, where the first three IVF procedures are, in fact, free. I won't disagree with you on the roller coaster of emotions, though.

Re: But life had other plans

#114

Post by sam_goody »

Nezghul wrote: post #93

Quoted post unavailable.

I honestly feel bad for you. I don't know where you are from or what you are up to, but it sounds like you are really in a bad way.

Which is a shame, as Life is something good, even if there are hard moments.

I strongly suggest looking for some way to improve and enjoy yourself. Breathing techniques help for some, Zen for others. Religion adds tremendously to personal well being, and helps deal with frustrations and pain.

Professional help can get you a long way, as can marriage if you are willing to genuinely care for your partner.

And drop social media, videos, drinks, drugs, porn, or whatever else is burning you out. (I don't have a smartphone and am amazed how much better my life is for it)

Enjoy life, as you only get it once.

Re: But life had other plans

#115

Post by andi999 »

Nezghul wrote: post #100
andi999 wrote: post #96

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because it is an extreme fringe opinion? A lot of countries have mandatory schooling (which quite a few kids dont consent), some conscription, a lot of criminals dont consent on beeing arrested. And generally people agree that no consent is needed for at least 2 out of these 3.

"Doing X without consent is irrelevant because consequences of X are full of nonconsensual things." How is that in favor of X?

I didnt say that. You asked 'how can people not understand, that in the age of...'. I tried to explain how people cannot understand. The explanation is what people cannot understand is far out or what happens normally. (yes, i know, you might have meant this more as an rhetorical device or sarcasm, but I think it is an important question you shd really ask yourself especially since you raised it)

Re: But life had other plans

#116

Post by necovek »

psiops wrote: post #102

Amazing story, and I wish OP and his family all the best! I wonder what the effects of ovary removal will be on the embryonic development. I can imagine the ovaries produce hormones that affect the embryos development. Or is the embryo effectively hormonally isolated by the placenta?

If you read towards the end, a healthy baby was born.

Re: But life had other plans

#117

Post by can16358p »

exikyut wrote: post #92
landmark3 wrote: post #84

I have an urgent deadline to release some crazy python code and here I am, instead, cutting onions. Beautiful way to start a day, happy life to you and your family <3

I'll bite :) what's the python code for?

Perhaps a model to calculate the effectiveness of birth control pills.

Re: But life had other plans

#118

Post by acid_dog »

ridaj wrote: post #82
oceanghost wrote: post #46

Earlier quoted context omitted.

IMHO the surest way to get pregnant is to be told by a doctor that you can't.

Some fertility specialists will say on first consult, the odds that you could get pregnant naturally just went down as you walked through the door to my office. All because the kind of people who visit a fertility specialist have lower fertility stats than the kind of people who don't (duh). The average practitioner doesn't really excel at distinguishing between correlation and causation.

Yes. I found it interesting that fertility specialists are actually quite focused on statistics. It's because in majority of infertility cases there is either no explanation at all, or no absolute blockers to pregnancy, just less chances. The entire field is in big part focused on how to improve patient's chances in this dice roll.

Re: But life had other plans

#120

Post by necovek »

throwawaysie wrote: post #90

Sorry for a small hijack. We have been trying a kid for a few years, doing IVF etc. with no luck so far. An endless source of irritation to me is a complete inability of the doctors to show any kind of probability distributions for the process. So, I'd like to find data that answers questions like how many embryos are alive after n days on average and on 10th percentile etc. Does anyone know a decent data source for…

Don't get bogged down on statistics. They matter with large numbers, and in each cycle, you are dealing with at most a dozen or two fertilized eggs. Looking at all the stats only made us feel worse about our outcomes.

My wife and I were supposedly "perfect" candidates (doctors were convinced we'd conceive on the first try), but it took two full cycles and a number of FETs from all of a dozen or so good quality eggs to be transferred for our two kids (with the second, we had success with our last remaining frozen embryo, so make that two cycles and 9 embryos for the first kid — basically, with first, we were extremely unlucky, but then it was two FETs and no full cycles for the second, which was a relief).

Basically, for those who do get success on the first try, there have to be plenty of us that don't for the stats to average out to what they are.

Post reply on HN