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Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

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111–120 of 217 posts

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#111

I'm not really sure whether to agree or disagree. I have asian parents and went through the whole ordeal. I can honestly say that, as a kid, I didn't enjoy it, but then again, I can't imagine anyone would. However, I definitely would not be as knowledgeable, intelligent, or well brought up without the asian schooling. This article and most people against asian parenting's viewpoint is from the outsiders viewpoint. Th…

> On the flipside however, it is undeniable that asians outperform westerners.

Look around your office and name 5 things invented in the Asia.

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#112

A contrary viewpoint: After studying a number of different cultures and backgrounds and histories, I'm generally an admirer of the school of parenting laid out by Chua. Well, I think some of the more insulting/demeaning/negative-reinforcement isn't so great, but the overall focus on achievement and duty as superior to having fun... I do respect that. I'll explain why - I used to think the opposite until I read Andre…

Hate to say it, Sebastian, but this whole comment seems built on the back of a false dichotomy. You don't either berate your kids and force them to toil for years at something they hate OR they turn into listless, lifeless middle managers who just fart along. Plus, you're completely ignoring survivorship bias (in some cases literally): for every Andre Agassi, there are probably thousands of parents who told their kid…

FuckinA.

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#113

I'm not really sure whether to agree or disagree. I have asian parents and went through the whole ordeal. I can honestly say that, as a kid, I didn't enjoy it, but then again, I can't imagine anyone would. However, I definitely would not be as knowledgeable, intelligent, or well brought up without the asian schooling. This article and most people against asian parenting's viewpoint is from the outsiders viewpoint. Th…

> it is undeniable that asians outperform westerners [Citation needed]

At least in the context of the US (which was the topic of the article):

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asian_American#Education http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Race_6_figure_household_an...

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#114
post #100
post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

No, I do not believe in a strict order imposed by the hierarchy. My view, which I've come to through studying both Maslow's Hierarchy and Dabrowski's Theory of Positive Disintegration, is that you're able to operate at the highest level you've so far achieved during your lifetime, even if one of the lower levels is missing. For example, one who had all five levels fulfilled during childhood will be capable of self-ac…

What's the point of a "hierarchy" then, if the "upper" levels do not depend on the "lower" ones? Basically what you're saying here is a tautology: one is able to operate at a "level" that, well, one is able to operate at.

It's clear that vsingh claims that you need to fulfill the lower levels to reach the higher ones for the first time.

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#115
post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Chinese or ABC? other than physical appearance ABCs are no different then white Americans. Chinese in China are nothing like ABCs in America. ABCs are a disgrace to the Chinese race. How does it feel to look Chinese but can't even write in supposedly "your own language". They shouldn't even be called Chinese, they are Americans.

I'm Chinese, personally I could never understand how anyone could be "proud" of being a member of 1/4 of the population of Earth, which is what Chinese basically means.

Watch more CCTV. You'll get a constant stream of subtle and not so subtle cues about how awesome and noble your heritage is and how your compatriots have been bullied by foreign powers throughout history.

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#116

Just my couple of cents worth of first hand input... Most Chinese families aren't crazy-obsessed with achievement - I'd say about 1/4 of them exhibit this kind of insane behavior, but that's still a very, very high rate, which is where this stereotype comes from. The rest are similar to their high-achieving white counterpart families. Just as a data point, my two parents (two MDs and one PhD, yeah, it could have been…

"I would like to bring up a possibility, which is possibly controversial: a lot of these kids let themselves be trampled on by their parents. In addition to (probably) being bullied at school, they are bullied at home by their parents. I really wish they would do more to stand up for themselves."

I can imagine that only someone who has never been through years of systematic abuse / bullying would lay the blame on the victim.

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#117

A contrary viewpoint: After studying a number of different cultures and backgrounds and histories, I'm generally an admirer of the school of parenting laid out by Chua. Well, I think some of the more insulting/demeaning/negative-reinforcement isn't so great, but the overall focus on achievement and duty as superior to having fun... I do respect that. I'll explain why - I used to think the opposite until I read Andre…

The plural of anecdote is not data. The story about Agassi is nice, but a red herring. Most people do not succeed in such a spectacular way. They remain mediocre and still 'hate tennis and their father'. A prime example are Chinese olympic teams. If you've seen the documentary about the rowing team, hand-picked, drilled in military style and note they still losing to Western teams, you can be nothing but sad for them…

You can't say that these children who do not make it to the top, do not make it anywhere? Obviously a lot more study needs to go into this before anyone can make such blatant remarks either way.

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#118
post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is not intended to exactly disagree: Many times when people cite the Maslow hierarchy, they often to take it as an axiom that the hierarchy is completely exactly how people work, and to lead better lives, people must go about fulfilling exactly these needs in this order. As someone who presumably subscribes to the hierarchy, would you agree that you seem fairly certain that this is how it works? And, if so, can…

No, I do not believe in a strict order imposed by the hierarchy. My view, which I've come to through studying both Maslow's Hierarchy and Dabrowski's Theory of Positive Disintegration, is that you're able to operate at the highest level you've so far achieved during your lifetime, even if one of the lower levels is missing. For example, one who had all five levels fulfilled during childhood will be capable of self-ac…

Some clarifications:

1. Presumably you don't have to satisfy everything in each level to be considered satisfying that level; otherwise if your entire family dies in a plane crash, you can never achieve MH3 again, and if you never got MH5 before that, you're permanently fucked.

2. If you get to MH4, but then your town gets hit by a neutron bomb, killing your wife, family, and friends, you get your MH3 knocked out, but your MH1, MH2, and MH4 are all still intact (MH4 because you telecommute most of the time, so your career is intact). Are you immediately eligible for MH5, or do you have to regenerate your MH3 first?

3. Interesting corner case: Say you get to MH3 by virtue of being raised in a rich American family. At age 18, you fly somewhere to visit a college by yourself, and your entire city gets blown away by a neutron bomb. You now have no friends or family, but life insurance on your family pays off handsomely, so you are at MH2. You decide to become a soulless driven businessman, and you do fine; you get promoted, everybody respects your competence, you respect other people's competence, etc, but you have no friends and no companionship. It would appear that you have reached MH4, but you never got there while you had MH3; does this count as MH4? Or do you deny the possibility of this scenario? (I made it up, so that's perfectly valid.)

(These are not leading questions; I'm curious as to how the Maslow viewpoint deals with corner cases.)

Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#119
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Re: Why Chinese Mothers are Not Superior (from a female Chinese engineer)

#120
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