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Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

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Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#111

Post by revvx »

leereeves wrote: post #102
unbalancedparen wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That is not correct. I have no interest in damaging anybody. That is why I did not write names and other things that happened in the article. He has already been banned from other conferences. I am trying to protect myself based on what happened and other people told me, I assure you the last few weeks have been a hell for me. My only objective is to be able to run my conference as I want and not to be harrassed.

But you did identify the woman on Twitter. I won't link to it because I don't think we should share it further, but someone posted it in this discussion. I sympathize but I think the court of public opinion is unlikely to do anything other than further escalate things.

I watched this unfold on Twitter, and it was a third-party related to the woman that decided to "out" themselves.

It's not an easy position for a conference organizer to be in.

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#112

Post by bradenb »

alexanderlabrie wrote: post #79
duxup wrote: post #64

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>I can't imagine legal action helping much. If they're continuing to harass them as described, it seems like a prudent choice.

What's outlined in the article doesn't meet the burden of proof. There was a conflict and OP solipsistically experienced it as a big deal. Meanwhile, there's plenty of oppression and destitution in the world, but let's all focus on some low-level drama because it's more entertaining.

It may be low-level drama to you, but clearly the author felt threatened by the couple. The spam messages, the threats to release personal information, etc. I would have no qualms with seeking legal action.

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#113

Post by revvx »

commandlinefan wrote: post #12
leereeves wrote: post #7

How can we know if your side of the story is the truth? Either way, this is an excellent example of why the Twitter Justice System is a bad idea.

That was my takeaway - she's doing to him exactly what he allowed other people to do to her. He's finding that he doesn't like it.

The conference organizer denied a speaker position in a conference. All that happened in private.

The person and a third-party engaged (allegedly) in doxxing and public shaming.

Even if the conference organizer was in the wrong, there's a world of difference between those two things.

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#114

Post by narag »

gregmac wrote: post #61
opportune wrote: post #19

Perhaps I missed it but is it known specifically why that person was uninvited to begin with?

> My team and I were contacted by different people to warn us that they were uncomfortable with the participation of a speaker and her boyfriend in our conference. They told the organization of the conference that this couple had caused problems to women in the community. > Several people who knew both of them confirmed that they had had problems with them in the past. We also talked with the organizers of other conf…

There's a puzzling detail: that it's a couple who were causing problems to women. If it was a man, little imagination is needed to conjecture that the problem could be something related to sexual harrasement, even if mild.

A woman alone, well, it could be the same if she's homosexual.

A couple? No problem figuring out they behave like idiots with everyone, as the article describes they did with the autor. But he says that they make women unconfortable specifically.

I'm not implying that this detail is suspicious, just that it stands out when you have incomplete information. Of course you can't ask jerks not to be weird :)

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#115

Post by juliusmusseau »

unbalancedparen wrote: post #84
bquinlan wrote: post #63

I've been a co-convener for two Python conferences in Vancouver. The conferences were small ( For me, the key sources of stress were: 1. hoping that tickets and sponsorship would cover our costs (at some point you have to pay for your venue, flights for your keynotes, etc. and this happens before ticket sales open). I think that we lost a few hundred dollars on the first conference and donated a few hundred dollars t…

Some simple things (logistics, catering, etc) in countries like Argentina are more difficult. However, your are right. We had a LOT of fun last year. I think I am pessimistic because of everything that happened these last few weeks.

Good luck in the courts. Unfortunately that route is very slow.

(You're probably looking at 1.5 to 3 years before you obtain any final orders - and then there's the issue of enforcing any orders you might obtain!)

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#116

Post by duxup »

bradenb wrote: post #112
alexanderlabrie wrote: post #79

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What's outlined in the article doesn't meet the burden of proof. There was a conflict and OP solipsistically experienced it as a big deal. Meanwhile, there's plenty of oppression and destitution in the world, but let's all focus on some low-level drama because it's more entertaining.

It may be low-level drama to you, but clearly the author felt threatened by the couple. The spam messages, the threats to release personal information, etc. I would have no qualms with seeking legal action.

Personally I'd feel really concerned if someone upset at a conference ... contacted a personal acquaintance who is involved in it all like a girl friend.

To me that would indicate some serious "boundaries issues."

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#117

Post by igaray »

duxup wrote: post #8

>Nevertheless, we didn’t expect a threatening reaction followed by several emails, Twitter DMs, persistent phone calls and Whatsapp messages. She even texted my girlfriend, one of the organizers of the conference, whose telephone number is not public and wasn’t given to her at any moment. At the same time, she started contacting other speakers of the conference. At that point you know you made the right choice... the…

Exactly this, you want to make the right choice and not be judgemental or act out of fear, but once the other party becomes needlessly belligerent one knows what to do.

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#118

Post by enriquto »

The reaction of the organizer is very sad. Civilization is based on the peaceful collaboration of people who may hate each other. Disallowing such collaboration is, by definition, uncivilized.

Being able to deal with people that make you very uncomfortable without creating a fuss is a fundamental requirement of adulthood. Regardless of the callous reaction of the un-invited person, it was not OK to un-invite them, at least for the reasons exposed in this article.

The organizer says:

> Being accused like that caused me harm.

of course it did. Just like the harm you did by cancelling invitations on behalf of a hypothetical discomfort of other people. It is exactly the same behavior.

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#119

Post by DuskStar »

duxup wrote: post #98
0815test wrote: post #65

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> ..."At that precise moment I saw the former speaker. She was calling the security of the event and using her cellphone to record me. She yelling that I was at the conference to stalk her, and that I was harassing her and following her. I never thought something like this could ever happen. It is worth noting that, at this point, I had only talked over the phone with her once, met her in person also once and, as I s…

I'm not sure what you mean by "cry bully" at this point.

I'd define 'CryBully" as the general pattern of "you should hurt this person because I'm sympathetic and I say they hurt me". Literal crying, claiming harassment and getting someone removed from a conference when no harassment happened in retaliation for a speaker disinvitation would qualify as crybullying in my book.

Re: Bullshit I had to go through while organizing a software conference

#120

Post by bduerst »

duxup wrote: post #8

>Nevertheless, we didn’t expect a threatening reaction followed by several emails, Twitter DMs, persistent phone calls and Whatsapp messages. She even texted my girlfriend, one of the organizers of the conference, whose telephone number is not public and wasn’t given to her at any moment. At the same time, she started contacting other speakers of the conference. At that point you know you made the right choice... the…

Right? If you're asked not to speak at a conference, why would you go on to consistently prove it was the right decision to remove you?
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