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Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

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Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#111

Post by pmiller2 »

sjg007 wrote: post #93
pmiller2 wrote: post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It’s not really that simple. As another commenter says, you have to disclose before you can formally request accommodation. And, given the disadvantages of doing so, it’s often not a good idea to disclose until there are problems. By that point, the employer might not be very cooperative, and, even if they are, the process of requesting accommodation need not be made easy or explained well. And, if things still go so…

You can always file a lawsuit in addition to the EEOC complaint.

How is that supposed to make things better? You get all the disadvantages of filing with the EEOC, combined with all the stress and headaches of a lawsuit, and you get to be known as “that person who sued their employer.”

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#112

Post by nonamenoslogan »

_d8k6 wrote: post #106
rnatkinz wrote: post #103

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Just the fact that you feel so offended about being called "mentally ill" shows how you feel about actually mentally ill people, like depressed people. That's all there is to it.

I am not concerned with how I perceive mentally ill people. Mental illness touches different facets of my family in different ways. I am quite familiar with it, it’s challenges and it’s stigmas. I don’t look down on mentally ill people, because I love and am friends with many people who suffer from mental illness. My objections are due to the societal biases that others hold against mentally ill people. My problem wi…

Its not factually incorrect whatsoever, you just don't like it. Autism is a mental disorder, no question about it--you even made the point by calling it a "cognitive disabilty." Cognitive meaning "relating to, being, or involving intellectual activity" and disability being obvious. Calling something a synonym of itself and arguing that its a completely different thing is pretty obtuse.

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#113

Post by efa »

kraig911 wrote: post #100
sjg007 wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What state are you in? You can get Medicaid and county services in some states and possibly find a center based program for her.

Texas. Wait list is 19 years. We get some services but we're past the age limit on most of those. Not to mention most of them are so defunded it's like 30 mins of speech therapy available a month...

Fellow Texan. We have a 16 yr old girl on the spectrum. Not sure how old your daughter is. The public schools are required to provide service (even before starting school) once your daughter has been officially diagnosed and it's recorded in their records. Also it's hit and miss regarding schools. We've had bad elementary, middle, and high school. We transferred and found good schools. Some school care (and "get it") and some don't. Keep up the good fight!

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#114

Post by nonamenoslogan »

6stringmerc wrote: post #55
_d8k6 wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Autism is not a mental illness. I am not mentally ill. I was born with a disability which causes social impairments and a host of other symptoms. Being Autistic is beyond my control, and is untreatable other than just trying my damndest to “pass” as neurotypical whereever and however I can. I find it incredibly insulting and damaging to label me as mentally ill.

[flagged]

This shouldn't be flagged, it is spot on.

Autism is the ADD/ADHD of the 'oughts. Overly diagnosed (come on, 1:55, really?), misunderstood (is the creepy guy who stares too much and never says anything a freak or is he autistic?), and often times used like a crutch by those who both want an easy out and/or don't want to take responsibility for their actions (oh, I have mild Aspberger syndrome and your offending me).

The notion of a "spectrum" is ludicrous too, how ever can we lump in someone who's a bit slow yet fully independent with someone like the above poster who's 8/10 year olds can't go potty on their own? This is a disservice to people on both ends of that "spectrum."

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#115

Post by Ricardus »

There are jobs where I would absolutely never disclose being on the spectrum. Typical corporate 9-5 stuff. But my current gig is as a technical director at an art museum, and my aspie super power is technical stuff (as it relates to this) like lighting and sound. I have disclosed being on the spectrum to many people at work, and they didn't bat an eyelid. It's super mellow and SO not corporate. It's great. A perfect fit, really.

A lot of is is me hiding in the booth, so I don't have to interact with people if I don't want to, but pre-show stuff ALWAYS requires me to interact with artists. Thankfully I can fake that part. Usually when I demonstrate competence at the task at hand they don't care about the rest.

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#116

Post by pmiller2 »

Sileni wrote: post #94
pmiller2 wrote: post #81

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What do you mean by “make it very, very costly for people to bully me?” That sounds to me like a strategy that can easily and frequently backfire.

[Not op] Salted earth. It does backfire, especially for that relationship. Usually if it goes to that extreme I'm not going to be able to save the relationship. But anyone who witnesses you burning a whole forest down to kill a squirrel tends to leave you be after that.

So, basically /r/ProRevenge level stuff? I can’t imagine how you could get away with any of that in a sane workplace.

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#117

Post by mercer »

jasonlotito wrote: post #52
awakeasleep wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Does it at least improve as they get older?

Not the OP, but I can answer this. It depends. Autism is a spectrum, not a single condition. I have two children with autism, and they are different. The younger one is much more self-sufficient than the older one. Has it gotten easier? With the younger one? Yes. With the older one? No. The reasons are many. Both are still in diapers at 8 and 9 (soon to be 10), though the 8-year-old is getting potty trained. We are h…

As a high-functioning, doggedly independent diagnosed autist: thanks a ton for your efforts. My parents did the best they could, and I'm uncomfortably aware of how much effort it must have taken at times to deal with my particulars. They never quite knew what they were dealing with, but they gave me unconditional love and support, and ultimately that's what mattered most, even if they failed at understanding my particular needs/quirks. I'm sure I gave them a hard time much of the time.

Other than that I'd suggest looking into health care in other western nations. I'm being vague because I don't know your particulars, but so far I've been quite impressed by the support provided in Europe for people on the spectrum. It's not ideal, but it's affordable and the quality seems alright so far.

If there's nothing in particular keeping you in one place, and if you can find work elsewhere, it could be worth exploring expat life if you have one or more autistic children. And it could be great for yourself too.

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#118

Post by mercer »

kraig911 wrote: post #31

I'm having difficultly explaining my child has autism and need the time off all the time. Seriously people's expectations versus handling reality are very misaligned. Everyone constantly tells me I look sleepy and I've over heard from some that maybe I drink too much. They don't understand the time it takes to drive a kid to see 3 different specialists every other week, to drive to and from ABA therapy (which doesn't…

Hey, that sounds really tough and the drinking sounds a bit worrisome. I'm not a stranger to either of these issues, so please don't hesitate to send me an email. Don't be a stranger :).

EDIT: both the perception of being a drinker and actually being a drinker, obviously at different times in my life.

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#119

Post by mercer »

ciaranm wrote: post #57
awakeasleep wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Does it at least improve as they get older?

It's different, certainly. I'm talking second hand about someone so I don't want to attribute too much of what are my observations as truth - but he's definitely more aware of when he's struggling and can articulate that better compared with when he was younger. He's also at a secondary school with very small class sizes that's set up to help with cases like his, which helps. He does have other health issues that mak…

It can be tough to find the niche to thrive in, but I've seen it work quite a few times. So at least it's possible. Sometimes it does require a degree of permanent care by parents/guardians, but some degree of autonomy and even 'thriving' is possible. Don't lose hope!

Re: Disclosure of autism at work holds risks and benefits

#120

Post by mercer »

kraig911 wrote: post #100
sjg007 wrote: post #60

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What state are you in? You can get Medicaid and county services in some states and possibly find a center based program for her.

Texas. Wait list is 19 years. We get some services but we're past the age limit on most of those. Not to mention most of them are so defunded it's like 30 mins of speech therapy available a month...

Is moving to Europe at all an option? I get the impression that support for autism is a bit better here.
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