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Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

bbc.com

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Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#101

Post by tekla »

yapyap wrote: post #67
cullumsmith wrote: post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe counterintuitive, but I've found that having more kids actually makes some things easier. With 4+ children, the kids almost never come to us for entertainment. They form their own little society and find tons of ways to play and interact with each other. The little ones are just as likely to ask one of their older siblings to read them a story as they are to ask a parent, for example. Sure, things like laundry…

Isn’t that just parentifying one or more of your children and passing it off as a solution because it’s easier for you?

You mean a completely normal thing that 99% of the world does?

I took care of my sister when I was 7 and she was 3 because both parents worked all day.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#102

Post by tekla »

esseph wrote: post #59
blindriver wrote: post #23

Is this a real question? Until the advent of electricity, when it was nighttime, it was mostly pitch black dark, and there was nothing you can really do except go to sleep. These days you're up a lot longer and there are more distractions like work and social media to keep you up well into the night. If you ever go camping with no cell phone signal, you'll go to sleep much earlier as well and get a lot more sleep tha…

> Until the advent of electricity, when it was nighttime, it was mostly pitch black dark, and there was nothing you can really do except go to sleep. Mfw torches and lanterns exist

I don't think you quite understand how expensive lighting was until the last 60 years.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#103

Post by aprilthird2021 »

627467 wrote: post #21
aprilthird2021 wrote: post #16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Sure, likewise, if you live in a multi generational household, raising kids is a lot easier on average. But most people cannot have those things in modern Euromerican nations

> multi generational household > most people cannot I dont know if "cannot" is the right verb here. I bet if you asked enough euromericans if they'd choose to live with extended family the answer would be "only in extreme and deprived circumstances". Isn't a common excuse for not having children that couples can't afford their own home?

Fair enough for the first point.

For the latter, there is some research towards that: https://www.nber.org/digest/feb12/impact-real-estate-market-...

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#104

Post by MagicMoonlight »

yapyap wrote: post #67
cullumsmith wrote: post #49

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Maybe counterintuitive, but I've found that having more kids actually makes some things easier. With 4+ children, the kids almost never come to us for entertainment. They form their own little society and find tons of ways to play and interact with each other. The little ones are just as likely to ask one of their older siblings to read them a story as they are to ask a parent, for example. Sure, things like laundry…

Isn’t that just parentifying one or more of your children and passing it off as a solution because it’s easier for you?

They used to dig coal, playing with their brother isn’t a hardship.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#105

Post by binary132 »

remexre wrote: post #46
binary132 wrote: post #38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I mean, we COULD just yield our kids to be raised by the state in pens by minimum-wage strangers and/or robots, I guess…

I can't tell if you're hyperbolizing the idea of community, or describing schooling.

No need to apply critical or creative thought when the downvote button is right there. Go on, just give it a click and carry on with your day so we don’t have to think about the bad things.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#106

Post by doubled112 »

j45 wrote: post #78
joaomoreno wrote: post #71

There's a huge difference between 7 hours of straight sleep which your body decides when to wake up from, and 7 hours of fragmented sleep which is constantly interrupted at the worst possible time. Every single night.

One secret that seems worth trying for everyone is to go to sleep at 9 PM and wake up at 3-4 AM. Get a few hours before anyone wakes up, and the best uninterrupted sleep for the most part, and the sleep before midnight has a magnified and compounding effect. Also early morning is at least 2x as effective energy and clarity wise as late nights.

I don't think this is the same for everybody.

I've experimented with sleep schedules a few times. If I go to bed before I'm ready I will not sleep very much at all. Best for me is when I go to bed at roughly 1am and wake around 7am. If you want me awake at 3am, I will need to stay up that late. As I learned resetting myself after overnight shifts, no matter how early I go to bed, I will not be functional at that time.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#107

Post by j45 »

doubled112 wrote: post #106
j45 wrote: post #78

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One secret that seems worth trying for everyone is to go to sleep at 9 PM and wake up at 3-4 AM. Get a few hours before anyone wakes up, and the best uninterrupted sleep for the most part, and the sleep before midnight has a magnified and compounding effect. Also early morning is at least 2x as effective energy and clarity wise as late nights.

I don't think this is the same for everybody. I've experimented with sleep schedules a few times. If I go to bed before I'm ready I will not sleep very much at all. Best for me is when I go to bed at roughly 1am and wake around 7am. If you want me awake at 3am, I will need to stay up that late. As I learned resetting myself after overnight shifts, no matter how early I go to bed, I will not be functional at that time…

It's very possible it's not the same for everyone. The circadian rythmn is universal though, and no human is really excluded from it. There might be a shift from it for some but verifying it is the important part to remove guesswork.

It also seems the case that sleep adjustments, in any direction, don't happen over night.

Consistency is the most important thing no matter what anyone does.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#108

Post by HaZeust »

dangus wrote: post #87
pizzafeelsright wrote: post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have been to many places, in different cultures, and countries. Outside of blood relationships and church, I have not seen a villager change a diaper for another without compensation.

You weren’t alive before industrial society.

Generally speaking, we're not supposed to devolve.

Re: Why modern parents feel more sleep deprived than our ancestors did

#109

Post by jml78 »

adverbly wrote: post #24

It's not the actual sleep. It's that parenting is exhausting. I could do physical labor for hours. Code straight for hours. But when I have to look after the 2 kids for 3 hours solo I'm totally exhausted. And I don't mean sit them in front of a TV - but actually try and feed them, change diapers, clean up after their messes, keep them entertained... Weekends are suddenly way more exhausting than weekdays. And then th…

Look, I can’t tell you what will work for you. My wife and I just made the kids adapt to our lives. We keep doing the same shit we always did. Concerts, they go with us. Breweries, they go. Don’t get It twisted, they were expected to behave. Kids pick up fast. Now my 17 year old and I love going to shows together. We are legit besties.

We just integrated the kids into our existing lives.

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