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Facts about throwing good parties

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Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#101

Post by the_af »

B-Con wrote: post #44
TheAceOfHearts wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Posts like this really make me feel like I'm living in a completely different reality from some people. I can't tell how much of this is exaggerated for comedic value and how much of it is genuine.

Dave Barry is a humor writer. I've followed him for 20 years and this is absolutely his style of writing, perhaps even paraphrased from one of his pieces. Hats off to OP if this is their original writing, it nails his style.

My introduction to Dave Barry was Slackware Linux and the fortune cookie program, which greeted me with random quotes, often some humorous remark by Dave Barry.

Because of this, I both like him and associate him with my early nerdiness.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#102

Post by highfrequency »

> 1) Prioritize your ease of being over any other consideration: parties are like babies, if you’re stressed while holding them they’ll get stressed too. Every other decision is downstream of your serenity: e.g. it's better to have mediocre pizza from a happy host than fabulous hors d'oeuvres from a frazzled one.

This is great, and applies broadly to parenting.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#103

Post by the_af »

gosub100 wrote: post #32
TheAceOfHearts wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Posts like this really make me feel like I'm living in a completely different reality from some people. I can't tell how much of this is exaggerated for comedic value and how much of it is genuine.

Its from an author who mainly wrote newspaper columns in the 90s. It's his style of tongue-in-cheek humor, and it's aged about 3 decades. I won't say "hasn't aged well", but just "aged".

It has definitely aged, but I'd say it has aged a lot better than, say, Scott Adams' humor.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#104

Post by franciscop »

Excellent tips, I've naturally followed most of these, it's crazy to see them reflected here explicitly, they felt "such a natural thing" to do. Given the quality of most of them, I'll try to follow better the couple I don't yet.

> 2) Advertise your start time as a quarter-to the hour. If you start an event at 2:00, people won't arrive till 2:30; if you make it 1:45, people will arrive at 2:00.

Needless to say this is highly culture-dependent. I recently threw a dinner at my place in Tokyo, and I had to add the warning:

- Official dinner time was 7pm.

- Told my Southern European friends at 7pm, expecting them to arrive at 8pm.

- Told my Japanese and American friends at 7:30-8, expecting them to arrive at 8pm.

It went much better than expected, everyone arrived within 8pm~8:10pm (okay, except that one friend who is chronically late, but that's a lost cause).

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#106

Post by ricardobeat »

Waterluvian wrote: post #65

I don’t like #2 because I hate the game of tricking people to be on time and then people start compensating further and eventually I’m trying to host a Cosmic Comet Party and you’re showing up after the punch has been distributed. I just like being honest and stripping away the layers of manipulation. “Starts at 2:00. Please be on time. If you don’t want to be the first, show up at 2:10. If you want to come early, we…

> Starts at 2:00. Please be on time.

This will not work with south american guests. It's a cultural thing, being a little late (but not too late) is cool; being on time seems desperate or too strict.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#107

Post by com2kid »

roncesvalles wrote: post #33
dlisboa wrote: post #14

I feel like this is really an American culture thing where parties or dinner parties are mostly the responsibility of the host. In movies or TV there’s even a common theme of guests judging the host’s hosting abilities. In Brazil you throw a party to people you like and they all have a hand in helping you, sharing the load. Everyone will be responsible for some part of it, all of it is organized informally, there are…

there is some nuance 1. Sometimes an "inner circle" will co-host a party but the other attendees are not expected to do anything except show up and have a good time, and maybe bring booze. This is common with roommates and in college. 2. What you're describing verbatim is a potluck. Potlucks in the US are popular among immigrant groups, family friend groups, or parties for clubs or associations. But ultimately they'r…

> What you're describing verbatim is a potluck. Potlucks in the US are popular among immigrant groups, family friend groups, or parties for clubs or associations. But ultimately they're considered a bit uncool/laidback and don't fit the definition of an American party. They're better described as "get-togethers".

As a foodie in the Pacific Northwest I disagree with this statement.

Potlucks are a chance for people to show off their skills. Some of the best potlucks I've been to have a competition aspect to them, complete with prizes.

As a host of a potluck I'll handle drinks, entertainment, and renting a venue, but the guest list is around 80% people who I can rely on to cook a damn good dish.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#108

Post by user_7832 »

roncesvalles wrote: post #37
cjbarber wrote: post #5

Found via: https://auren.substack.com/p/top-5-things-to-read-in-novembe... See also: https://x.com/wangzjeff/status/1983914310738047291 And also Nick Gray's 2 hour cocktail party book My personal thoughts on events: (These don't really apply to parties, but they do apply to non-party events) 1. Do intro circles: If it's a 5-25 person event with a handful of people that don't know each other, do an intro circle about…

>1. Do intro circles So, turn your party into hell on earth?

I think a middle ground is possible. Have people not talk about themselves, but rather how they'd react in some bizzare hypothetical situation (for example), and have a few limited options for them to pick and justify. Kinda like cards against humanity in some ways. Ofc ask people first in private what kind of questions etc they're comfortable with and what they'd like to talk about.

Almost everyone has something interesting to say or contribute, the hosts' ideal job is to bring that out.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#109

Post by Cerium »

franciscop wrote: post #104

Excellent tips, I've naturally followed most of these, it's crazy to see them reflected here explicitly, they felt "such a natural thing" to do. Given the quality of most of them, I'll try to follow better the couple I don't yet. > 2) Advertise your start time as a quarter-to the hour. If you start an event at 2:00, people won't arrive till 2:30; if you make it 1:45, people will arrive at 2:00. Needless to say this i…

I recently arrived at an Indian birthday party at 11 am (the scheduled time) and the host immediately responded, oops I forgot to tell you the real time... everyone else will arrive after noon.

Re: Facts about throwing good parties

#110

Post by latentsea »

buildsjets wrote: post #7

I sure miss the kind of parties where they have to get an emergency court order to cut power the building at 3am. I learned everything I need to know about throwing parties from Dave Barry. If you throw a party, the worst thing that you can do would be to throw the kind of party where your guests wake up today, and call you to say they had a nice time. Now you'll be be expected to throw another party next year. What…

Are you this guy?

https://youtu.be/7WPZyzeK7IE?si=QUXm5Fg48Wuq-wtr

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