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The quiet rebellion of a little life

caitlynrichardson.substack.com

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Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#101

Post by lcnPylGDnU4H9OF »

fwsgonzo wrote: post #47
lcnPylGDnU4H9OF wrote: post #35

Earlier quoted context omitted.

1) lots of people write like that; it's become a bit of a trend 2) the author did not capitalize "I" when referring to themselves like OP did

A trend? People never capitalized anything on IRC in the early 90s. The only time I saw it was on forums and other longer forms of text. And then eventually everyone else joined the Internet and more formal writing became the norm. Not wanting to pointlessly capitalize letters is neither here nor there. It doesn't mean anything.

That's fair enough but it is actually a style which some people choose for their blog. I'd also note that this post isn't on IRC; perhaps they're eschewing capitalization for some reason other than to communicate in a more natural cadence.

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#102

Post by Kirby64 »

SoftTalker wrote: post #28
fireynis wrote: post #5

I always think these kinds of mentalities are based on people who have never been in dire straits or financially insecure. Living a simple life is almost impossible, pursuing wealth is probably the only way to be secure in a simple life. Even if you FIRE, you need to pretty aggressively pursue wealth at the beginning to make it work.

My reaction as well. Sure, one can have a fulfilling life without always chasing more, more more and it is might be worth thinking about cutting out some excessive consumerism, but this... breakfast in bed on a sunday morning- sticky buns and black coffee, sharing a bed with my best friend. having more children. walking through the park while listening to the sounds of nature and kids laughing in the playground nearb…

> Most people who have a job where they aren't influencers, don't achieve anything, just go in for 8 hours a day and do ordinary work, are earning ordinary money, living in a small apartment, no pets allowed, have a marginally reliable car, can't afford to shop at the farmer's market, and with kids and homework and laundry and daily chores just want to get some sleep at the end of the day, spending three hours on cooking and enjoying a slow dinner with wine and music just isn't going to happen.

In what world does making pasta take 3 hours? If you wanted to be fast, making pasta is literally a 10 min endeavor. “Slow” could mean spending an hour… or 30 mins. Nothing there is unreasonable.

There’s plenty to be gleaned from shirking the “keeping up with the Jones’s” mentality and being able to enjoy with less. Maybe that less isn’t true poverty, but even then there’s plenty of ways to foster contentment.

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#103

Post by antisthenes »

bdangubic wrote: post #97
c0redump wrote: post #91

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> even if you are at FAANG making high six figures you still a slave I’m sorry, but do you know what a “slave” is? I can’t imagine the kind of hopelessly ignorant perspective a person must have to say something like this.

when you have no control over your life, when you can get paged on your honeymoon or your kids birthday, when you need to ask permission to take time off… as society we are past what was slavery back in the day - now we got modern-day slavery, working for THE MAN

I don't remember ever asking permission to take time off.

I just put the days I'm going to be out on the calendar and inform my team/boss/manager after the fact.

And these weren't cushy FAANG jobs either. Just your typical run of the mill IT-adjacent roles.

> when you can get paged on your honeymoon or your kids birthday

Yes, you can be paged, but if you set your boundaries, you don't have to respond to the page. Again, I don't remember ever jumping up and treating something like that as an emergency. Always prioritized my own errands first.

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#104

Post by bdangubic »

Kirby64 wrote: post #102
SoftTalker wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My reaction as well. Sure, one can have a fulfilling life without always chasing more, more more and it is might be worth thinking about cutting out some excessive consumerism, but this... breakfast in bed on a sunday morning- sticky buns and black coffee, sharing a bed with my best friend. having more children. walking through the park while listening to the sounds of nature and kids laughing in the playground nearb…

> Most people who have a job where they aren't influencers, don't achieve anything, just go in for 8 hours a day and do ordinary work, are earning ordinary money, living in a small apartment, no pets allowed, have a marginally reliable car, can't afford to shop at the farmer's market, and with kids and homework and laundry and daily chores just want to get some sleep at the end of the day, spending three hours on coo…

my wife made pasta yesterday, it took roughly 8.5 hours (unless you eat plain pasta with nothing or do not enjoy food it takes time to cook right…)

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#105

Post by pdimitar »

the_gastropod wrote: post #98
pdimitar wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Good thing I don't do any of those things. I'd like to draw your attention to the fact that you came here to be snarky and tear down a straw man... one that doesn't exist. I'm not going to bore you with my life story. But it has been an extremely bumpy ride and it's still not going well. Make what that info what you like. You'll probably say it's all my fault and I deserve it.

You said: > The author frames it as if you can just semi-retire and still have $200K a year I was just responding to that. I am as bleeding heart a liberal as they come. I recognize most people have much harder lives than I've had. I made some assumptions based just on your $200k comment above, and the fact that—let's face it—most HNers are making ridiculously large sums of money, and there is no end to these similar…

If you are giving me your permission then I will reach out. It's been getting increasingly shitty lately and I am on the brink. Maybe talking about it with a stranger will help.

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#106

Post by Kirby64 »

bdangubic wrote: post #104
Kirby64 wrote: post #102

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Most people who have a job where they aren't influencers, don't achieve anything, just go in for 8 hours a day and do ordinary work, are earning ordinary money, living in a small apartment, no pets allowed, have a marginally reliable car, can't afford to shop at the farmer's market, and with kids and homework and laundry and daily chores just want to get some sleep at the end of the day, spending three hours on coo…

my wife made pasta yesterday, it took roughly 8.5 hours (unless you eat plain pasta with nothing or do not enjoy food it takes time to cook right…)

When people say “make pasta” they typically mean make a pasta dish. This could mean nothing more than cooking dried pasta and incorporating premade sauce. Even making your own sauce doesn’t need to take long for a super tasty sauce. I assume your wife is talking about making fresh pasta, which is not common nor what I would immediately assume someone means when they say “make pasta” for dinner.

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#107

Post by antisthenes »

K0balt wrote: post #72
mattbee wrote: post #31

Mmmm the OP describes a very expensive mid-life retirement: an unspecified number of children, cats, a dog, a garden, living near enough a park that you might want to walk through, shopping at a farmer's market, books and art in your home, wine, and all in a "culturally rich" location! I think most humans are pleasure seeking and would choose the above, if it were a choice! But the pinnacle for most people I know wou…

That’s grim. There is a better way, but you can’t drink any of the kool aid. I wish I could tell other people how to do what I have done, but I have come to understand that it only works for me because i tend not to think things are important that other people value, and I value things that other people sacrifice to obtain those unimportant things. It’s worked very well for me. If I have a piece of advice I think peo…

Unfortunately what you described has been made illegal by incompetent "small town governments" by adopting Karen-esque zoning and building codes that would fine you to oblivion if you tried to build something affordable.

"Cheap", from what I'm currently seeing, starts at around $300,000 for a place like you describe. If you just buy raw land and try to build your own home, the county will either not let you, or it will end up more expensive than $300,000.

> You can go to zero but it doesn’t matter. Just do it again. And again. And again.

If it doesn't matter, you might as well not do it at all. Doing it again takes time in a game with a very limited amount of it. You can only do it again maybe 2-3 times in a lifetime. Maybe 4-5 if you have exceptionally lucky genetics.

Now $300k isn't that much, but it is going to be a barrier for a lot of average Americans.

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#108

Post by bdangubic »

antisthenes wrote: post #103
bdangubic wrote: post #97

Earlier quoted context omitted.

when you have no control over your life, when you can get paged on your honeymoon or your kids birthday, when you need to ask permission to take time off… as society we are past what was slavery back in the day - now we got modern-day slavery, working for THE MAN

I don't remember ever asking permission to take time off. I just put the days I'm going to be out on the calendar and inform my team/boss/manager after the fact. And these weren't cushy FAANG jobs either. Just your typical run of the mill IT-adjacent roles. > when you can get paged on your honeymoon or your kids birthday Yes, you can be paged, but if you set your boundaries, you don't have to respond to the page. Aga…

I just put the days I'm going to be out on the calendar and inform my team/boss/manager after the fact.

why do you have to do that? who is this “boss” of yours that needs to know about what you do?

as long as you work for someone you are owned and exploited. if we had a nice chat meeting each other irl and we broached the subject of compesation and you said “I am L76 at Netflix making $965k” I am would be immensely happy for you but would think “this lovely mate is actually worth $1,500,000 and just doesn’t even know it”

Re: The quiet rebellion of a little life

#109

Post by antisthenes »

the_gastropod wrote: post #80
pdimitar wrote: post #78

Earlier quoted context omitted.

How much did you make per year? How many jobs did you have? How many jobs did you hop?

In my most recent job, I earned $160k. During my ~15 year software development career, I worked for a total of 4 companies, none overlapping, none that required more than 40 hours per week. I saved ~60% of my take-home pay every year, and invested it in a 60/40 mix of VTSAX / VTIAX. I'm married, and my wife made $8,000 last year. I had to save enough to cover our collective expenses, otherwise this timeline would've…

> I never in my life made anywhere near $200k

> In my most recent job, I earned $160k.

Yeah, ok dude. At least you were honest, I guess.

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