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On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

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Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#101

Post by eyelidlessness »

briga wrote: post #43
eyelidlessness wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I like to drink more than I ought to (and less than I used to), but your assessment sounds not exactly but a lot like how I feel about cannabis. At any THC dose enough to feel at all, it’s almost always tunnel vision and time dilation and anxiety, and all I want is to go be alone to wait it out. All side effects, no joy there. If I’m lucky enough to hit the perfect mark of low dose but perceptible effects, I like it…

Everyone reacts to chemicals in their own way, but I think what you’re describing might be more related to general anxiety than to a particular chemical. It may exacerbate these feelings but I don’t think it’s ever really the root cause

This was exactly my theory for a long time, but I really do think it’s chemical. My baseline anxiety turns out to be very well treated by my ADHD meds (amphetamines). Cannabis high doesn’t feel at all like my baseline anxiety or like heightened anxiety that more closely fits typical general anxiety symptoms for me. It feels like what people describe when they talk about a bad trip.

Anyway I’ve thought about taking advantage of the legal market to see if there’s bud that works for me, and even (maybe especially) after working in the industry for over half a decade I’m not inclined. They just don’t grow anything for me, and I’m too old now to want to experiment.

I do appreciate your pattern recognition, because it’d be the same recognition I would have. I don’t think the pattern fits me though, I really do just react negatively to THC in high doses.

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#102

Post by listenallyall »

joshuamorton wrote: post #99
listenallyall wrote: post #94

Earlier quoted context omitted.

15-16-18, does it really matter? You were all "gold and gemstones" Anyway, you're going to tip, right?

I mean until they're $17 pre-tip, your drink is under $20. And yeah, most good cocktail bars except the absolute fanciest (like, nationally known) are running at half the price this person was saying. It's in incredible exaggeration.

It's really not. Go visit Los Angeles. Or Las Vegas. Even the freaking Washington Post was complaining. Washington. In 2015.

I'm not going to argue definitions of a "good cocktail bar" but the point is, they ain't cheap these days.

And a karma tip, if a drink is $15-16 pre-tip, you should not consider that drink to cost "under $20"

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/food/gulp-howd-we-g...

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#103

Post by pigtailgirl »

pronlover723 wrote: post #96
divan wrote: post #60

I never tried alcohol and never felt compelled to. As a kid I wondered what's happening with those drunk people I had a chance to see. So I read some books in library about alcohol (my mother was librarian, so that was my internet back then). It all just made sense and I decided that don't want to even try. I was asked to try alcohol by parents and relatives, I was ridiculed and insulted by classmates (drinking someh…

Where are you from and where do you live? My impression is the USA has the worst drinking culture. Many other places in the world have much better ones. UK pubs, Japanese izakayas. I had a pretty negative view of drinking growing up in the USA with MADD's messaging etc. Even though my parents drank socially it just seemed not worth. Then I moved abroad and my outlook changed Here's an interesting talk on some of the…

-- over here in Korea we have everyone beat for unhealthy alcohol consumption --

https://www.themonsoonproject.org/a-sobering-look-at-south-k...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hoesik

https://www.aljazeera.com/amp/features/2016/2/7/the-country-...

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#104

Post by rufus_foreman »

aussiesnack wrote: post #84

I'm a drinker in principle, as in not being a teetotaller, but am just not attracted to drink very often. I probably have less than a bottle of wine and half a dozen beers a year. Same with drugs. I've tried most of the common ones, including those considered very addictive, but was never tempted to make a habit of any of them. Likewise food - I'm not an over eater and am in my late '50s the same weight I was 3 decad…

[flagged]

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#105

Post by kitsunesoba »

oggadog wrote: post #15
derekp7 wrote: post #11

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I can say it helped me in my early 20's. I was "in my shell" up until I started going to bars and dance clubs once I hit about 21 to 22. Having just enough alcohol in me to not be shy helped build a social group, but it was still fun to go out even on nights that I would stick to soda or water. However depending on the bar I went to, some of them were more pleasant if I was drinking. When I was sober, I really couldn…

I definitely noticed this with a lot of people I worked with in engineering. They were quite shy and a bit hard to crack, but once they had a drink or two at a work event they were very sociable and easy to talk to. And outside of these situations they never really drank. So I think for them, alcohol was never really an issue.

This pretty closely describes how/why I usually drink as a dev.

While sober I can function socially more than well enough to get along in the day to day without issue, but it’s much much smoother if I’ve had some alcohol (but not too much).

I also tend to focus more squarely on my conversation partner when I’m buzzed, whereas sober my head is all over the place, plus I don’t get bored with the conversation or lose energy to converse as easily.

Since beginning to work from home I’ve had very little to drink, averaging 0-2 beers per month. It’s really a social thing.

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#106

Post by more_corn »

I gave it up in my 40s a couple years ago. I can’t say I miss it. I certainly don’t miss the hangovers and the feeling that I was killing myself. I plan to never have a hangover again and that probably means never drinking again.

I thought I would miss the social aspect, but I don’t. I’ve gone out with some friends and the places had mock tails or NA beer so it was just normal hanging out. Of course not being drunk I called it a night after an hour or so, but that’s probably sane and healthy.

The recent meta studies of the health effects of alcohol indicate that the health number of drinks per day is zero. Maybe you can have one or two a WEEK without negative health effects. Anyone who drinks more than that is needlessly lowering their lifespan and increasing risk of heart attack and cancer.

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#107

Post by aussiesnack »

rufus_foreman wrote: post #104
aussiesnack wrote: post #84

I'm a drinker in principle, as in not being a teetotaller, but am just not attracted to drink very often. I probably have less than a bottle of wine and half a dozen beers a year. Same with drugs. I've tried most of the common ones, including those considered very addictive, but was never tempted to make a habit of any of them. Likewise food - I'm not an over eater and am in my late '50s the same weight I was 3 decad…

[flagged]

Can't argue with that.

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#108

Post by more_corn »

dcw303 wrote: post #24

I love a drink but have found it very difficult to stop after a couple. Like the author, I haven't destroyed my life, but it has caused me all number of problems. The typical high functioning problem drinker. The one thing (and I tried many) that has worked for me is The Sinclair Method (TSM). After doing it for a couple of years, now I can still drinking socially without worrying about blowing up the night. It's not…

I’ve never been a problem drinker (I never had behavioral problems when I drank) but it was killing me. I was drinking a significant amount every day and after a while I had a two week hangover. I think that was my body’s way of calling uncle. I didn’t need to see a doctor to know something was very, very wrong. I simply decided to stop, to never experience an hangover again. And that was it.

I just firmly and with certainty decided to stop. Alcoholics call it rock bottom but I think it’s just knowing that you don’t want to do it ever again. That certainly has been with me for years and I see no reason it should ever leave me.

Get there and you’re done.

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#109

Post by apricot13 »

As someone who can take it or leave it when it comes to alcohol I've made some interesting observations about alcohol and drinking culture!

I've found that for some its less about the alcohol and more about the ritual and the way it makes you feel. pouring that glass of wine after work or sipping the fancy cocktail before your meal in a restaurant.

It's the ritual people crave and having something unusual to taste. I find alcohol has very little to do with it and if your not able to switch your after work wine for low or non alcoholic I would guess there's a bigger problem there that is being self medicated by the numbing effects of alcohol!

I've never had anyone call me out for not drinking.

I'm able to stop drinking at any time, this includes half way or even two sips into a new drink. If I feel it's gone or going too far I stop. If someone insists on including me in the round after I've said no the drink doesn't get drunk. This was the hardest thing for me to learn but I've never been called out on it!

I also never drink if I'm in any form of bad mood and I won't drive if i've had even a sip of alcohol.

I'm lucky to be able to follow these 'rules' as I've gotten older I've found alcohol affects my blood sugar quite severely so it's a helpful incentive as it's very scary when it happens!

The non and low alcohol selections now are brilliant. enough variety to have that ritual or make a fancy mocktail! Best part is sipping on them during meetings during the summer!

Re: On why I gave up drinking in my early twenties

#110

Post by more_corn »

Cloudef wrote: post #22

Alcohol helped me to gain social wisdom (did not drink before that at all, which I think is the reason I got bit outcast from people)

It’s possible to gain social wisdom without alcohol.

Here’s one for free: Surround yourself with people you like. Be the friend to them that you’d want for yourself.

That’s all the social wisdom you need.

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