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Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

jeremyeder.com

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Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#101

Post by felizuno »

I've always thought that trying to optimize life is the ultimate denial. In golf we have these people who spend hours on the range optimizing their swing but they seldom play a round because of course their score is never as "optimized" and that make them feel bad. They can max out point data but never in a way that changes the aggregate, which based on the invested effort turned into a feeling of defeat.

Life is mostly out of your control, if you think that the solution is to try and assert more control you're the reason the myth of Sisyphus is popular.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#103

Post by yodsanklai »

vhiremath4 wrote: post #47
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

> Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. This is patently false. If you start smoking cigarettes occasionally and start doing it more, you are becoming more of a smoker. The actions you take or don't take are the clearest input to the person you become. It's true that this is also the person you are, but that distinction seems meaningles…

> why such a strong aversion to people improving themselves?

It's fine to be competitive or trying to improve. But it seems to me that people reading this type of self-improvement articles are wasting their time (ironic if they want to be more productive).

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#104

Post by thebigjewbowski »

cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

> I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two distinct phases… the building/growth phase where you grind and learn and work non stop, and then a later phase that comes after where you enjoy what you built.

I actually just had this realization when I was lifting weights.

Initially I just wanted to lose weight and I had this idea of where I’d be once I did. Then I got to my goal weight and that wasn’t it. Now if I stop lifting, exercising and eating healthily all of my progress will eventually be gone; it’s a life long process not just something to do for awhile until I reach some goal.

I think it’s something I should apply to my professional life as well but it can be scary to take your foot off of the gas. I’ve done it in the past for the wrong reasons and wound up regretting it.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#105

Post by Teknoman117 »

thebigjewbowski wrote: post #104
cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

> I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two distinct phases… the building/growth phase where you grind and learn and work non stop, and then a later phase that comes after where you enjoy what you built. I actually just had this realization when I was lifting weights. Initially I just wanted to lose weight and I had this idea of where I’d be once I did. Then I got to my goal weight an…

Yeah, I really had to accept the "this is forever" part of getting healthier. Sure, the calorie deficit will eventually be able to end (sort of), but the lifestyle changes that allowed the weight loss have to be forever. Eating better has to be forever. Or at least be the general case rather than something done occasionally.

I watched my grandfather decline dramatically over his last few years due to a lifelong neglect of his health and I've resolved myself to do everything in my power to try to avoid his fate.

After a decade of false starts, I really had to get to the point where I was doing it for me. Years ago would've been better, but today is better than next year. 60 pounds down in the last 9 months. Could've done more probably, but I really had to figure out a rhythm to it and learn to love it. Ironically, this time around is the first time I preserved enough to get to the point where I can recognize the positive effects. My mood is dramatically more positive after exercise, etc. I never believed I could get to that point.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#106

Post by 1659447091 »

mikkergp wrote: post #54
vhiremath4 wrote: post #47

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. This is patently false. If you start smoking cigarettes occasionally and start doing it more, you are becoming more of a smoker. The actions you take or don't take are the clearest input to the person you become. It's true that this is also the person you are, but that distinction seems meaningles…

If the only reason a person is having a conversation with me is so they can be a better conversationalist tomorrow, than they can fuck off. I worked out today, I ate healthy today, I worked hard and did chores for my family, and praticed my art forms and I did it all for today. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with planning for tomorrow, but there is a problem with seeing "eve…

I believe it's more along the lines of "I'm having a conversation with you today because I value and care about you and our friendship etc; I want to be the kind of person that shows up for others and leaves people I interact with in a better place/mood/etc."

Instead of being the person not aware of their moods and carrying resentment over the smallest slights so they end up bitching about it to everyone. If one never chooses, or "vote", for the positive/uplifting inter/action, then they are "voting" to keep being the person who always has something to complain about.

Similarly, the smoking example, choose to be someone who cares about their health or the person who could not care less. Better is defined by the user. But either way, it will certainly build, or describe, the type of person they are choosing or "voting" to be.

Though, its really just stating the obvious. The more you do or don't something the more those actions become you. The "votes" on those actions don't have to be overt. It's like they were trying to find a novel way to restate the self-help quote: "Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny." (-attributed to the usual suspects)

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#108

Post by Fricken »

cortesoft wrote: post #26

Oh man this is such a perfect example of productivity porn. Every action you take isn’t a vote for the type of person you wish to become, it is a vote taken by the person you are. I hate this mindset of “I am constantly working towards becoming someone else”. When do we spend time as the person we are? When do we enjoy the fruits of our labor? I feel like some people who take this mindset see their lives as being two…

Life is about the journey, not the destination. However, it won't be much of a journey if you don't pick a good destination.

Re: Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become

#110

Post by molsongolden »

Only tangentially related but I think about "choices are votes" frequently when choosing where to spend money.

Every dollar spent at a business is a vote for that business to continue existing.

This framing pushes me to support more local businesses, even if it's a couple $ extra. Same with attending the local events that you want your community to continue offering.

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