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Today you, tomorrow me

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Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#101

Post by bmelton »

snth wrote: post #79
bmelton wrote: post #42

Perhaps my favorite good act to do is to help people push their car when they need it. It's dumb, really, but having grown up in the south, people are just hospitable that way. It generally doesn't take much to do, it helps traffic, and at least for me, it makes me feel good about myself. Besides, it always irks me when I see someone trying to push their car out of traffic and nobody else is helping. Especially consi…

Once, my car died near an intersection; as I jumped out to push, two guys appeared out of nowhere alongside me to help push. It took about 15 seconds, and they waved off my thanks and were gone again. It was shocking how unexpectedly helpful they were... I tend to expect no help in a situation like that.

Exactly. It's one of those things that is generally interpreted as generous. Being nice to people can often back fire; Complimenting the barista on her earrings might be seen as a come-on. Applauding someone's work ethic is often seen as sarcasm. It's not something to worry about, generally, but I've withheld a generous comment before based on how it might have been perceived.

Helping somebody push a car (so long as you don't ask for payment after, or something) is hard to misinterpret, and has to completely make the recipient's day.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#103

Post by csomar »

edw519 wrote: post #77
snth wrote: post #72

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I appreciate the sentiment, but "it'll all work out in the end" seems like a warning sign of wishful (poor) thinking.

Who am I going to listen to, the man who taught me more than I ever could ever imagine (and is now retired and giving away his millions) or some stranger who thinks he knows better? I often share thoughts like this in the OP's spirit of "pass it on" so that it may benefit someone else. Take it or leave it. But doubting it, commenting on what it "seems", or downvoting it only makes you look like a fool. [Sorry for the…

Who am I going to listen to, the man who taught me more than I ever could ever imagine (and is now retired and giving away his millions) or some stranger who thinks he knows better?

If he is stranger and you don't know him, how did you know that your mentor is wiser then? See, you have already made two mistakes: The first, by not accepting an alternative opinion; and second, by thinking that what you know (or you got from your mentor) is doomed to be the best.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#104

Post by hammock »

raganwald wrote: post #52
bemmu wrote: post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My wife, Arlene, was ill with tuberculosis--very ill indeed. It looked as if something might happen at any minute, so I arranged ahead of time with a friend of mine in the dormitory to borrow his car in an emergency so I could get to Albuquerque quickly. His name was Klaus Fuchs. He was the spy, and he used his automobile to take the atomic secrets away from Los Alamos down to Santa Fe. But nobody knew that. The emer…

Man, that's not even close to how I remembered the story. I need to watch Infinity again, maybe that version took liberties with the original by merging the hitchhikers with Fuchs, and that's what I remembered...

I like your version better.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#105

Post by emehrkay »

dtf wrote: post #19

For some reason, half way through this great story I suddenly found myself contrasting it with that less great story that did the rounds last July 4: the Sun-Times' Terry Savage's "There is no free lemonade" (original article expired probably with good reason, but here's a copy I found: http://bit.ly/eqIMNe ) wherein author recounts her horror at finding a lemonade stand manned by two girls giving away their product…

Best thing about "No Free Lemonade" is that she yelled from the backseat of the car to the kids about fiscal responsibility. She was being fucking chauffeured.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#106

Post by andreyf »

sid0 wrote: post #96
snth wrote: post #72

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I appreciate the sentiment, but "it'll all work out in the end" seems like a warning sign of wishful (poor) thinking.

Ah, the just-world phenomenon. Some people call it a fallacy -- I for one am not so pessimistic.

Think of it as a self-organizing social p2p protocol. Do the right thing. If you feel it's ruining your life, you should probably go hang out with a different crowd.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#107

Post by jlcgull »

snth wrote: post #81
edw519 wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Who am I going to listen to, the man who taught me more than I ever could ever imagine (and is now retired and giving away his millions) or some stranger who thinks he knows better? I often share thoughts like this in the OP's spirit of "pass it on" so that it may benefit someone else. Take it or leave it. But doubting it, commenting on what it "seems", or downvoting it only makes you look like a fool. [Sorry for the…

Of course you're free to listen to whomever you like; I wish you would take my comment more as an alternative viewpoint than as an insult. I do appreciate the sentiment of your story, that people should help others, but personally I think the attitude "it'll all work out in the end" ruins more lives than it saves.

I think the attitude "it'll all work out in the end" ruins more lives than it saves.

I think that is cynicism speaking, more than anything else.

Most importantly, how "end" is defined will determine if "it worked out" or not.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#108

Post by tt »

Back when I was an intern at IBM in upstate NY, I often drove between Boston and NY late at night. There was no cars in sight in the early hours of the night for certain parts of hwy 84 and 684. No cell phones back then either.

I periodically saw people whose cars had broken down on the side of the road, and stopped each and every time to offer help. One time, I drove a woman and her young son to a nearby gas station to make phone calls. Another time, I drove another couple to a nearby town.

It turned out that for one such time, I happened to help the daughter of a researcher who also worked in the same IBM research lab I was working at. The next morning, the father looked me up and took me out to coffee to thank me. That was sweet.

Nowadays, I no longer have to drive late at night, but I still look for the opportunity to help. It has always brought me peace to know that I can get someone out of a jam when needed.

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#109

Post by kenjackson »

kirse wrote: post #59
yellowbkpk wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

On. The complete opposite end of the spectrum check out Top Gear's show where they visited the American South. Obviously it was meant to provoke but it does bring up a few good points. I'd link you but I'm on my phone.

Yea, and I also learned how to become a doctor by watching House and ER, fish for Alaskan crab by watching Deadliest Catch, and learned all about how to have relationships by closely studying Friends and Entourage! So no, that episode of Top Gear does not bring up any "good points" to draw legitimate conclusions about the American South. All it shows is that if you insult the average person enough, they'll get pissed…

Weird. I had a two friends get spat on their first day in the South, and it went downhill from there. They were an interracial couple. The local sheriff asked them when they planned on leaving, as if they were the problem. This was 2010, not 1950.

I'm sure the South is more welcoming for some people, but I wouldn't assume it to be the case for everybody. And I'm sure it depends on what areas of the south you go to (its still one of the most segregated areas in the US).

Re: Today you, tomorrow me

#110

Post by raganwald »

hammock wrote: post #104
raganwald wrote: post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Man, that's not even close to how I remembered the story. I need to watch Infinity again, maybe that version took liberties with the original by merging the hitchhikers with Fuchs, and that's what I remembered...

I like your version better.

I'm going to watch "Infinity" again over the holidays. If that's the version, the credit goes to Matthew Broderick's mom. She wrote the script.
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