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The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

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Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#101

Post by mcv »

balabaster wrote: post #98
josefresco wrote: post #41

"I went outside to get coffee and ran into three different neighbors who wanted to chit-chat. I wanted to scream, ‘For every word that comes out of your mouth, I’m losing money!" This is a statement from someone who either hasn't been freelancing that long, or who hasn't realized that "brain down time" is just as important as raw coding hours. I've worked "for myself" for almost 20 years and for the first 5 I too pan…

The biggest problem for me was my (ex)spouse always pushing for billable hours. Every time I decided I wanted time off there was a constant nagging reminder and guilt of not only what it would cost to go and do what I want - for example cost of flights, accommodation, entertainment and food, but also the cost of the loss of income for that time off meaning that every time I was away from my keyboard it was costing me…

I'm happy I have neither this problem nor the ones in the article. I'm aware what my time is worth, but I'm also aware I'm making enough money that I don't have to worry about it. I'm extremely careless about money; not that I'm wasting it (the opposite, rather), but as long as there's money, I'm fine. When I have too much, I shovel it away to some place where it catches interest. I've got an accountant who worries about the details.

Recently, my son, still in primary school, had to check out a potential secondary school. My wife wasn't able to take him there, so I left early. Cost me €240 in revenue. That's a lot of money, but then again, I made more than that in the rest of the day, and I don't want to deny myself the opportunity to do these things with my son.

There's more in life than money. Sure, it's important, but only as a way to an end. Money itself is not the goal, life is. Don't sacrifice your life or happiness for mere money.

(Of course it's easy to say that when you can afford to. Not everybody can.)

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#102

Post by clojurestan »

balabaster wrote: post #98
josefresco wrote: post #41

"I went outside to get coffee and ran into three different neighbors who wanted to chit-chat. I wanted to scream, ‘For every word that comes out of your mouth, I’m losing money!" This is a statement from someone who either hasn't been freelancing that long, or who hasn't realized that "brain down time" is just as important as raw coding hours. I've worked "for myself" for almost 20 years and for the first 5 I too pan…

The biggest problem for me was my (ex)spouse always pushing for billable hours. Every time I decided I wanted time off there was a constant nagging reminder and guilt of not only what it would cost to go and do what I want - for example cost of flights, accommodation, entertainment and food, but also the cost of the loss of income for that time off meaning that every time I was away from my keyboard it was costing me…

Sounds like a shitty spouse

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#103

Post by gdfasfklshg4 »

balabaster wrote: post #98
josefresco wrote: post #41

"I went outside to get coffee and ran into three different neighbors who wanted to chit-chat. I wanted to scream, ‘For every word that comes out of your mouth, I’m losing money!" This is a statement from someone who either hasn't been freelancing that long, or who hasn't realized that "brain down time" is just as important as raw coding hours. I've worked "for myself" for almost 20 years and for the first 5 I too pan…

The biggest problem for me was my (ex)spouse always pushing for billable hours. Every time I decided I wanted time off there was a constant nagging reminder and guilt of not only what it would cost to go and do what I want - for example cost of flights, accommodation, entertainment and food, but also the cost of the loss of income for that time off meaning that every time I was away from my keyboard it was costing me…

It sounds like you have serious issues with your relationship.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#104

Post by HenryBemis »

ams6110 wrote: post #80
stevage wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

50%? Even less in my case. 3 hours a day is plenty to get paid as much as I was before on a salary. Honestly I find the time-related issue as a freelancer is having too much of it, and putting it to good use rather than just lounging around.

Do you include your self-employment tax, health insurance, and saving for retirement in those three hours as well? Or is that just making up what was in your take-home pay?

If one lives a modest life (no Ferraris/Great-Gatsby-parties), on a sensible financial management, one can have north of £/€/$1m on the side, in one decade(speaking for UK/EU/USA)(for contracts on IT/IT Sec/GRC/PM.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#105

Post by erik998 »

One thing I would like to add... I created my own solo S-corp and started on the path of contracting. I have been successful enough to minimize my payroll taxes using a solo 401k (~18k max contribution and then my company can contribute 25% of my w-2 salary). Now I am at the point where I am investigating how to setup a defined benefit plan for myself to defer 75-100k in payroll taxes. Most likely a cash balance plan.

I think most employees at FAANG don't realize how much they really give up paying CA taxes and a significant portion of Federal taxes.

Then I realize why FAANG companies don't have defined benefit plans... The tenure of most employees would not make it worthwhile.

I wish we had something like the SAG-AFTRA rate fees for programming. We don't so I guess my solo way of doing things will have to do for now.

https://www.sagaftra.org/contracts-industry-resources

Look at those rates!

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#106

Post by balabaster »

gdfasfklshg4 wrote: post #103
balabaster wrote: post #98

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The biggest problem for me was my (ex)spouse always pushing for billable hours. Every time I decided I wanted time off there was a constant nagging reminder and guilt of not only what it would cost to go and do what I want - for example cost of flights, accommodation, entertainment and food, but also the cost of the loss of income for that time off meaning that every time I was away from my keyboard it was costing me…

It sounds like you have serious issues with your relationship.

Had, don't worry, that's no longer a problem. Past tense.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#107

Post by porker »

photoguy112 wrote: post #28

I went from hourly, to per project, to weekly billings. When I charged hourly I ended up working A LOT more than 9-5. Per project work was good but I ended up losing a lot of prospects in the quote. Since many of my projects ran into the 20-40k range, my closing rate was 1/10 (already pre-screened, what I deemed as high quality prospects). This made me feel like crap. Instead of per project, I decided to increase the…

> I went from hourly, to per project, to weekly billings

I have tried all three, read all the HN favourites on why value pricing is the way; tried charging for roadmapping; and yet I come back to the most stressful of day-rate (hourly by any other name), unable to break this in 15 years of technical consulting.

Why? Because with per project billing I was losing 30-50% as client expectations were different to mine. When I added 30-50% to the prices, I didn't win the jobs. I could write a spec 80 pages long (which no client would pay for) and still there were variances which cost me.

On my current $50k+ project I've got the client to bear the risk because he's the worst client for cost overruns I've had, and it's on a time and materials system. However because he has no more money than the top range of estimates, and because he wants everything and more, I feel trapped and as stressed as if it was fixed price (which it's turning out to be).

It feels like I am missing something obvious that other developers/consultants have got. I want to price on value so I'm not stressed about every minute's productivity. My clients want fixed price so the risk is stacked on me; they won't/can't do sprints (often because their board of directors won't approve it, even if they say they see the benefits); and the projects are unique systems each time, so the estimation is not accurate.

I freelance/consult because it pays well, but this way of working sucks.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#108

Post by Blaiz0r »

zilian wrote: post #92
mancerayder wrote: post #87

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Freelancing can be highly stressful and demoralizing, unless you take the steps to go into consulting or beyond. It's a ladder, just like your corporate gig, you gotta do the work to move up or suffer where you are stuck. I have one sticking point I'd love to hear what the HN crowd does to deal with it. I'm freelancing and I find gigs that are long-term via recruiters / LinkedIn. And never directly with companies. Wh…

Outsource this to a profiler/marketer to build yourself an identity Don't work under your name but create a brand even if it's just you ;)

This sounds like a really interesting idea, have you done this yourself or seen any good examples of it?

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#109

Post by balabaster »

clojurestan wrote: post #102
balabaster wrote: post #98

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The biggest problem for me was my (ex)spouse always pushing for billable hours. Every time I decided I wanted time off there was a constant nagging reminder and guilt of not only what it would cost to go and do what I want - for example cost of flights, accommodation, entertainment and food, but also the cost of the loss of income for that time off meaning that every time I was away from my keyboard it was costing me…

Sounds like a shitty spouse

It's easy to make a judgment on one scenario, but being unable to get out of that mindset doesn't make her a shitty spouse, it's a fear that's been brainwashed into her by her upbringing. She is more than her fears.

Thankfully though, I'm no longer in this position. I was rather more pointing out a toxic mindset that you need to overcome not just in yourself but potentially in your spouse and the rest of your families.

Re: The Psychological Trap of Freelancing

#110

Post by fxn »

It is your choice. You are in charge and freelancing gives you the opportunity to bill _less_ and leave space to other important things in your life for which a regular job would compete. Family time, sports, hobbies, learning new things, etc.
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