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The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

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Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#11
post #9
post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I read quite a lot of business biographies, and I have noticed that a lot of really successful entrepreneurs go on trust and handshakes. If they're burned they will remember and never do business with you again, but if they meet someone that believes in them at an early stage they will go through a lot to keep doing business with them. I just read a biography of a guy that started a chain of stores 30 years ago, and…

Indeed. There's also the pattern, first anecdotal but since confirmed by at least one survey [+], that a disproportionate number of entrepreneurs are dyslexic, and thus have to rely on verbal communication and gut trust more than others. [+] http://www.cass.city.ac.uk/media/stories/story_8_45816_44300...

That is a really eye-opening and interesting study.

I took the liberty of submitting it, since I'm sure other people will appreciate it. Hope you don't mind.

http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=462767

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#13

A lot of arguments can be avoided by delving into the scary but true, raw but honest emotional side. I learned this from a great consultation. Take this example interaction: Husband: "There's $500 missing from our checking account." Husband (unemotionally-oriented, bad): "What did you spend it on?" Husband (Good): "I'm worried about where the $500 went." Always tell people how you feel. Human beings have emotions. Co…

What husband gives their wife access to the checking account? That's just begging for missing money... ;) EDIT: I think people missed the sarcasm...

[deleted]

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#14

A lot of arguments can be avoided by delving into the scary but true, raw but honest emotional side. I learned this from a great consultation. Take this example interaction: Husband: "There's $500 missing from our checking account." Husband (unemotionally-oriented, bad): "What did you spend it on?" Husband (Good): "I'm worried about where the $500 went." Always tell people how you feel. Human beings have emotions. Co…

What husband gives their wife access to the checking account? That's just begging for missing money... ;) EDIT: I think people missed the sarcasm...

I thought it was pretty standard for accounts to be joint. If you can't trust your wife with a bank account, why did you marry her!?

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#15

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What husband gives their wife access to the checking account? That's just begging for missing money... ;) EDIT: I think people missed the sarcasm...

I thought it was pretty standard for accounts to be joint. If you can't trust your wife with a bank account, why did you marry her!?

You should see my wife

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#16

Earlier quoted context omitted.

What husband gives their wife access to the checking account? That's just begging for missing money... ;) EDIT: I think people missed the sarcasm...

I thought it was pretty standard for accounts to be joint. If you can't trust your wife with a bank account, why did you marry her!?

It is standard; my wife and I share our accounts freely. I was just attempting sarcasm because it seems that all the women I personally know are compulsive spenders, especially in the shiny makeup/polish/perfume aisles...

Even if she spent everything in our account, that would still never be a reason to not be/stay married to her. Money/spaending is one of the least important things to get in a fuss about in a marriage. I would love her just as much.

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#17
post #11
post #9

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Indeed. There's also the pattern, first anecdotal but since confirmed by at least one survey [+], that a disproportionate number of entrepreneurs are dyslexic, and thus have to rely on verbal communication and gut trust more than others. [+] http://www.cass.city.ac.uk/media/stories/story_8_45816_44300...

That is a really eye-opening and interesting study. I took the liberty of submitting it, since I'm sure other people will appreciate it. Hope you don't mind. http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=462767

Not at all! Stories/ideas/memes aren't owned.

Though, it's a duplicate:

http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=86875

http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=87148

http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=91738

http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=87549

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#18

A lot of arguments can be avoided by delving into the scary but true, raw but honest emotional side. I learned this from a great consultation. Take this example interaction: Husband: "There's $500 missing from our checking account." Husband (unemotionally-oriented, bad): "What did you spend it on?" Husband (Good): "I'm worried about where the $500 went." Always tell people how you feel. Human beings have emotions. Co…

What husband gives their wife access to the checking account? That's just begging for missing money... ;) EDIT: I think people missed the sarcasm...

I didn't miss the sarcasm, but I agree with the downvoting anyway: There are enough people who honestly believe the way you were parodying that comments like this can be harmful by virtue of their effect leading these people to believe that their views are more widespread.

There's a reason why we don't make racist or homophobic jokes, even sarcastically -- the same applies to misogynistic jokes.

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#19

A lot of arguments can be avoided by delving into the scary but true, raw but honest emotional side. I learned this from a great consultation. Take this example interaction: Husband: "There's $500 missing from our checking account." Husband (unemotionally-oriented, bad): "What did you spend it on?" Husband (Good): "I'm worried about where the $500 went." Always tell people how you feel. Human beings have emotions. Co…

I think this email is remarkably effective in blending at least three tactics, only one of which is telling the recipient how he feels.

The second tactic is rousing the other person's sense of shame: "I think this is more a matter of respect."

The third tactic is making a credible and no-nonsense threat of retaliation: if you don't pay up now, I am unlikely to help you with work in the future.

It's the combination of these tactics -- expressing personal disappointment, shaming the recipient, and threatening sanction -- delivered in an authentic, personal, yet still professional manner, that makes it so effective.

Re: The most effective debt collecting email I ever wrote

#20

A lot of arguments can be avoided by delving into the scary but true, raw but honest emotional side. I learned this from a great consultation. Take this example interaction: Husband: "There's $500 missing from our checking account." Husband (unemotionally-oriented, bad): "What did you spend it on?" Husband (Good): "I'm worried about where the $500 went." Always tell people how you feel. Human beings have emotions. Co…

What husband gives their wife access to the checking account? That's just begging for missing money... ;) EDIT: I think people missed the sarcasm...

Re your edit - Ask yourself what your comment added to the discussion. That's what I do when I post something that gets downmodded.

The answers to down-votes usually come from that.

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