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Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

theatlantic.com

11–20 of 149 posts

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#11

As far as I am concerned, I have not observed this. I see plenty of people hanging out at restaurants and elsewhere. Many places are packed. It seems like there has been this trend of journalists writing these finger in the wind op-eds opining about a society that never existed or about something which is not a problem for most people but is turned into 'a thing' for the sake of pageviews and virality.

The article presents actual data which you rebut with...your feelings?

"From 2003 to 2022, American men reduced their average hours of face-to-face socializing by about 30 percent. For unmarried Americans, the decline was even bigger—more than 35 percent. For teenagers, it was more than 45 percent. Boys and girls ages 15 to 19 reduced their weekly social hangouts by more than three hours a week. In short, there is no statistical record of any other period in U.S. history when people have spent more time on their own."

vs.

"As far as I am concerned, I have not observed this."

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#12

Hanging out with people glued to phones is boring

You nailed it. I've kind of stopped having get-togethers at my house (either for friends or family) because people show up, do a brief normal-human greeting interaction, and inevitably eventually sit down and just kind of zombie out scrolling their phones. Despite efforts to strike up conversation, play a board game or whatever, people just can't put the fucking things down for even 5 minutes, let alone enough time t…

Have you considered collecting everyone's phone when they arrive only giving them back when they leave?

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#13

As far as I am concerned, I have not observed this. I see plenty of people hanging out at restaurants and elsewhere. Many places are packed. It seems like there has been this trend of journalists writing these finger in the wind op-eds opining about a society that never existed or about something which is not a problem for most people but is turned into 'a thing' for the sake of pageviews and virality.

It’s possible that these journalists are in their own bubble or echo chamber.

The journalists who write this stuff have become isolated and spend excessive amounts of time doomscrolling or arguing about random crap on Twitter. So they assume that’s what everyone is doing.

Meanwhile lots of people are just out here living life. Plenty of places where I live are filled with people hanging out. Hardly anybody glued to their phones.

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#14

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You nailed it. I've kind of stopped having get-togethers at my house (either for friends or family) because people show up, do a brief normal-human greeting interaction, and inevitably eventually sit down and just kind of zombie out scrolling their phones. Despite efforts to strike up conversation, play a board game or whatever, people just can't put the fucking things down for even 5 minutes, let alone enough time t…

Have you considered collecting everyone's phone when they arrive only giving them back when they leave?

Honestly, I wish that could become a cultural norm. As things are now it would be a kind of awkward request, but I bet it would really help if it were acceptable.

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#15

As far as I am concerned, I have not observed this. I see plenty of people hanging out at restaurants and elsewhere. Many places are packed. It seems like there has been this trend of journalists writing these finger in the wind op-eds opining about a society that never existed or about something which is not a problem for most people but is turned into 'a thing' for the sake of pageviews and virality.

The article presents actual data which you rebut with...your feelings? "From 2003 to 2022, American men reduced their average hours of face-to-face socializing by about 30 percent. For unmarried Americans, the decline was even bigger—more than 35 percent. For teenagers, it was more than 45 percent. Boys and girls ages 15 to 19 reduced their weekly social hangouts by more than three hours a week. In short, there is no…

There’s a difference between people “spending more time alone” and the articles claim that people have “stopped hanging out.”

If one actually goes outside it’s trivial to see people hanging out.

Also maybe ironic that I say this here on hacker news on Valentine’s Day but it’s true. Restaurants, bars and even the local mall were packed today.

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#16

As far as I am concerned, I have not observed this. I see plenty of people hanging out at restaurants and elsewhere. Many places are packed. It seems like there has been this trend of journalists writing these finger in the wind op-eds opining about a society that never existed or about something which is not a problem for most people but is turned into 'a thing' for the sake of pageviews and virality.

It’s possible that these journalists are in their own bubble or echo chamber. The journalists who write this stuff have become isolated and spend excessive amounts of time doomscrolling or arguing about random crap on Twitter. So they assume that’s what everyone is doing. Meanwhile lots of people are just out here living life. Plenty of places where I live are filled with people hanging out. Hardly anybody glued to t…

The article has data, would you care to comment on that or just speak in platitudes?

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#18

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You nailed it. I've kind of stopped having get-togethers at my house (either for friends or family) because people show up, do a brief normal-human greeting interaction, and inevitably eventually sit down and just kind of zombie out scrolling their phones. Despite efforts to strike up conversation, play a board game or whatever, people just can't put the fucking things down for even 5 minutes, let alone enough time t…

Have you considered collecting everyone's phone when they arrive only giving them back when they leave?

They will stop showing up most likely.

I would also just stop asking these people out.

Me and my partner don’t meet with people that often but we meet with people that don’t do phones while we meet.

I think I would just ask people out of my house or if in restaurant I would finish up and leave.

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#19

Hanging out with people glued to phones is boring

You nailed it. I've kind of stopped having get-togethers at my house (either for friends or family) because people show up, do a brief normal-human greeting interaction, and inevitably eventually sit down and just kind of zombie out scrolling their phones. Despite efforts to strike up conversation, play a board game or whatever, people just can't put the fucking things down for even 5 minutes, let alone enough time t…

[deleted]

Re: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

#20

Hanging out with people glued to phones is boring

You nailed it. I've kind of stopped having get-togethers at my house (either for friends or family) because people show up, do a brief normal-human greeting interaction, and inevitably eventually sit down and just kind of zombie out scrolling their phones. Despite efforts to strike up conversation, play a board game or whatever, people just can't put the fucking things down for even 5 minutes, let alone enough time t…

My house doesn't have service, I can only use my phone over my wifi. It is so funny when we host my wife's family and nobody can get on their phone to check their Instagram or tiktok or what not. Her nieces and nephews hate visiting because of that. But at least people we host talk to each other.
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