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The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

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Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#11

Post by remoquete »

I've three kids. It's wonderful, it's exhausting, and it's often terrifying. Being a parent is a painful experience, but so is living life. Would my life be easier and less painful without them? Yes. Would my life be better without them? No, just different.

I respect antinatalists, but I chose differently. I chose to bring laughter and joy to this absurd, meaningless Universe we habit, even if for a brief lapse. Is it the right choice? Perhaps not. Is it a selfish choice? Yes. Why did I do it then? For the same reason I keep breathing. I don't know much more than that.

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#12

Post by trevyn »

keyle wrote: post #6

I have two kids. It's tough. But this kind of "opinion" column on a large network is just despicable. Kids is the hardest thing to come to life, I call it "life on hard mode". And I've moved across the world. But the gains are immense. You can bend yourself backward your entire career trying to achieve something that is taken away in a whiff. Your children is a richer investment. When you leave this earth, you're lea…

>Going to a restaurant twice a week with your partner, when you're 40+ and no kids, will get very repetitive and boring.

That is a very strange perspective.

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#14

Post by Uinchuling »

andyjohnson0 wrote: post #10
keyle wrote: post #6

I have two kids. It's tough. But this kind of "opinion" column on a large network is just despicable. Kids is the hardest thing to come to life, I call it "life on hard mode". And I've moved across the world. But the gains are immense. You can bend yourself backward your entire career trying to achieve something that is taken away in a whiff. Your children is a richer investment. When you leave this earth, you're lea…

I was agreeing with you until you wrote: > we're decreasing, the typical white middle-class couple is facing extinction. [...] I don't mean this with a grain of racism Please don't do this. "We" on HN and in the west and in world in general is incredibly diverse. Your comment disrespects this human diversity. Please take some time to think about that.

[flagged]

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#15

Post by DarkNova6 »

wkat4242 wrote: post #3

I can imagine. For me it's the reason also to not want kids. I want to enjoy my life. But it's good for environmental reasons to not have kids anyway.

It's good not to breath for environmental reasons too.

In contrast, kids are necessary to stop overaging and the collapse of our society.

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#16

Post by roenxi »

Well, lets look at the data over at OurWorldIndata: https://ourworldindata.org/grapher/children-per-woman-un?tab...

Looks like the last time there was a big change was 1960, I assume that was the development of good birth control techniques. I'd theorise that families never really wanted children, and once given the means to make effective choices we discover that humans don't think it is that rational to have kids.

It is a weirdly philosophical problem - similar to what we will soon face with artificial intelligence - of what exactly are we trying to do as living entities. It is hard to find a path that isn't either nihilism or, from a factual and materialistic perspective, insanity.

I personally think this is probably a good thing. Evolutionary forces will push society above replacement rates sooner or later by whatever means it takes, but we should enjoy the window where we don't need to fight about resources for as long as is possible. If only the African nations would get their birth rates under control, anyway.

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#17

Post by keyle »

trevyn wrote: post #12
keyle wrote: post #6

I have two kids. It's tough. But this kind of "opinion" column on a large network is just despicable. Kids is the hardest thing to come to life, I call it "life on hard mode". And I've moved across the world. But the gains are immense. You can bend yourself backward your entire career trying to achieve something that is taken away in a whiff. Your children is a richer investment. When you leave this earth, you're lea…

> Going to a restaurant twice a week with your partner, when you're 40+ and no kids, will get very repetitive and boring. That is a very strange perspective.

How so?

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#18

Post by notfried »

For those of you who decided not to have kids in your 20s-30s, and are now in your 40s+, when changing that decision now becomes increasingly more difficult: did you regret it? Did your position of “I want to live my life, I don’t want the hassle or the cost, or there are too many humans already, or something else”, did that position change or weaken?

Asking for a friend :)

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#19

Post by keyle »

andyjohnson0 wrote: post #10
keyle wrote: post #6

I have two kids. It's tough. But this kind of "opinion" column on a large network is just despicable. Kids is the hardest thing to come to life, I call it "life on hard mode". And I've moved across the world. But the gains are immense. You can bend yourself backward your entire career trying to achieve something that is taken away in a whiff. Your children is a richer investment. When you leave this earth, you're lea…

I was agreeing with you until you wrote: > we're decreasing, the typical white middle-class couple is facing extinction. [...] I don't mean this with a grain of racism Please don't do this. "We" on HN and in the west and in world in general is incredibly diverse. Your comment disrespects this human diversity. Please take some time to think about that.

I actually removed it after trying it to word it differently as I knew someone would pick on this instead of focusing on my main point. Thanks.

Re: The New Work-Life Balance: Don't Have Kids

#20

Post by bemusedthrow75 »

keyle wrote: post #6

I have two kids. It's tough. But this kind of "opinion" column on a large network is just despicable. Kids is the hardest thing to come to life, I call it "life on hard mode". And I've moved across the world. But the gains are immense. You can bend yourself backward your entire career trying to achieve something that is taken away in a whiff. Your children is a richer investment. When you leave this earth, you're lea…

> Look at yourself and be clear about this: we're thinning, the typical white middle-class couple is facing extinction.

> Society needs fixing, not having less kids. Smart people need to have kids too.

Society needs fixing to preserve the place of the white middle class?

I am, to be clear, a well-educated white single man over 40 (who has enough to do without this restaurant-based existence you think is the apotheosis of childlessness). But I think society needs fixing so that I am not in a class protected by privilege. So far I think the threat of extinction is having no meaningful impact either way.

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