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Remembering things that haven't happened yet

bessstillman.substack.com

11–20 of 33 posts

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#11
Very sad, but beautiful. The following passage especially stuck with me:

"Researchers Gilbert, Quiodbach and Wilson coined a term called the “end of history illusion,” which describes people’s tendency to look back on the last ten or twenty years of their life and concede that they’ve changed a great deal. Yet when they’re asked to project how much they’ll change in the next decade, they tend to believe they’ll change much less, if at all, as if all their life was leading up to this moment, in which they’ve achieved peak selfhood.

"The illusion protects us…from realizing how transient our preferences and values are which might lead us to doubt every decision and generate anxiety.

"Sounds like the researchers read Derek Parfit. I’m currently experiencing whatever the opposite of the “end of history illusion” is. Let’s call it: “The beginning of potentially infinite unknowable and yet inevitable futures reality.” Okay, that’s kind of a mouthful. I’m not good at pithy marketing slogans. Knowledge of Jake’s impending death brings with it the certainty that my life is about to undergo tremendous, nonconsensual upheaval, inevitably changing my preferences and values, though I don’t know any details except that I’ll change in likely vast and unexpected ways. Without the comforting illusion of stasis, what can I do to assuage the anxiety caused by reality? That’s what the videos are for."

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#12
post #5

Earlier quoted context omitted.

funny site [ 31 ] days without a kant/can't pun

Context: https://existentialcomics.com/comic/524

My favorite form of this is in Hedwig and the angry inch...

"One day in the late mid-eighties, I was in my early late-twenties. I had just been dismissed from University after delivering a brilliant lecture on the aggressive influence of German philosophy on rock 'n' roll entitled 'You, Kant, Always Get What You Want.' At 26, my academic career was over, I had never kissed a boy, and I was still sleeping with mom. Such were the thoughts flooding my tiny head on the day that I was sunning myself... in an old bomb crater I had discovered near the Wall. I am naked. Face down, on a broken piece of church, inhaling a fragrant westerly breeze."

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#13

Tangentially related, if you are ill, I would implore you to read Seneca's Letter 78 to Lucilius [0]: You will die, not because you are ill, but because you are alive; even when you have been cured, the same end awaits you; when you have recovered, it will be not death, but ill-health, that you have escaped. There is, I assure you, a place for virtue even upon a bed of sickness. It is not only the sword and the battl…

Concur—I like and admire the Stoics: https://jakeseliger.com/2023/09/18/stoic-philosophy-finding-...

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#14

Tangentially related, if you are ill, I would implore you to read Seneca's Letter 78 to Lucilius [0]: You will die, not because you are ill, but because you are alive; even when you have been cured, the same end awaits you; when you have recovered, it will be not death, but ill-health, that you have escaped. There is, I assure you, a place for virtue even upon a bed of sickness. It is not only the sword and the battl…

Concur—I like and admire the Stoics: https://jakeseliger.com/2023/09/18/stoic-philosophy-finding-...

Beautiful writing. Jake, I should have referenced this article in the above comment. Damn!

(For those who don't know, Jake is Bess's husband, and the subject of the post)

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#15

Tangentially related, if you are ill, I would implore you to read Seneca's Letter 78 to Lucilius [0]: You will die, not because you are ill, but because you are alive; even when you have been cured, the same end awaits you; when you have recovered, it will be not death, but ill-health, that you have escaped. There is, I assure you, a place for virtue even upon a bed of sickness. It is not only the sword and the battl…

[deleted]

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#17
post #11

Very sad, but beautiful. The following passage especially stuck with me: "Researchers Gilbert, Quiodbach and Wilson coined a term called the “end of history illusion,” which describes people’s tendency to look back on the last ten or twenty years of their life and concede that they’ve changed a great deal. Yet when they’re asked to project how much they’ll change in the next decade, they tend to believe they’ll chang…

The perception of the past is different from the perception of the present or the future. Probably it has something to do with lived experiences as compressed information versus the guesswork of the unknown future.

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#18
post #11

Very sad, but beautiful. The following passage especially stuck with me: "Researchers Gilbert, Quiodbach and Wilson coined a term called the “end of history illusion,” which describes people’s tendency to look back on the last ten or twenty years of their life and concede that they’ve changed a great deal. Yet when they’re asked to project how much they’ll change in the next decade, they tend to believe they’ll chang…

The first day of forever in the infinite garden?

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#19
post #11

Very sad, but beautiful. The following passage especially stuck with me: "Researchers Gilbert, Quiodbach and Wilson coined a term called the “end of history illusion,” which describes people’s tendency to look back on the last ten or twenty years of their life and concede that they’ve changed a great deal. Yet when they’re asked to project how much they’ll change in the next decade, they tend to believe they’ll chang…

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terror_management_theory

Re: Remembering things that haven't happened yet

#20
post #11

Very sad, but beautiful. The following passage especially stuck with me: "Researchers Gilbert, Quiodbach and Wilson coined a term called the “end of history illusion,” which describes people’s tendency to look back on the last ten or twenty years of their life and concede that they’ve changed a great deal. Yet when they’re asked to project how much they’ll change in the next decade, they tend to believe they’ll chang…

The perception of the past is different from the perception of the present or the future. Probably it has something to do with lived experiences as compressed information versus the guesswork of the unknown future.

I’d wager it’s a protective mechanism, honed by evolution.

The sense of self is important to maintaining a coherent handle on reality, and to building social bonds - if you see yourself as an ephemeral phenomena - as you are - then it makes both matters considerably harder, and harms your chances of survival.

For example, people like to talk about “forever”, when the reality is always anything but - yet they earnestly mean and believe it in the moment as to accept that this too is transient is too painful, and leads to an avoidance of commitment due to the understanding that this is not forever.

We have to keep our blinkers on, lest we get spooked by the passage of time and the fleeting phenomenon that is a human life.

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