11–20 of 112 posts
EDIT - formatting poetry for Hacker News is tough... - Humility - Humility is not letting someone win or pretending not to care when you lose. It is not feigned ignorance or polite dishonesty. Humility is not a trick to gain approval, nor is it an abdication of your pride. --- Humility is a stand taken to the end with passion; an opinion that you choose and live by with conviction and integrity, but if shown to be in…
I’ve noticed in myself and anecdotally in others that a lot of stubbornness in conversation simply comes from the desire for validation. Having someone acknowledge what I’m saying is generally enough to get a conversation moving forward, where ignoring or not responding to my input can cause me to fixate until I recognize what I’m doing and break myself out of it. But if I feel mild validation, even if it is conclude…
Check out existential therapy. I'm not saying this to pathologize or minimize what you're saying, just that it's something I used to suffer from before I realized via (said therapy) that everyone else is just a narcissistic fuck living in their own narrative and they literally don't even remember what you said six hours later. It's very liberating once you absorb that. (obviously, what you write on the internet is forever, but that's kind of why you should be so much less anxious about your conversations IRL).
EDIT - formatting poetry for Hacker News is tough... - Humility - Humility is not letting someone win or pretending not to care when you lose. It is not feigned ignorance or polite dishonesty. Humility is not a trick to gain approval, nor is it an abdication of your pride. --- Humility is a stand taken to the end with passion; an opinion that you choose and live by with conviction and integrity, but if shown to be in…
Strong opinions, loosely held.
https://www.theonion.com/monk-gloats-over-yoga-championship-...
I’ve noticed in myself and anecdotally in others that a lot of stubbornness in conversation simply comes from the desire for validation. Having someone acknowledge what I’m saying is generally enough to get a conversation moving forward, where ignoring or not responding to my input can cause me to fixate until I recognize what I’m doing and break myself out of it. But if I feel mild validation, even if it is conclude…
Just to be contrary, it's possible that you're reading too much into other people's responses if you're actually beating yourself up in the middle of the night about what someone meant or didn't. Check out existential therapy. I'm not saying this to pathologize or minimize what you're saying, just that it's something I used to suffer from before I realized via (said therapy) that everyone else is just a narcissistic…
I’ve noticed in myself and anecdotally in others that a lot of stubbornness in conversation simply comes from the desire for validation. Having someone acknowledge what I’m saying is generally enough to get a conversation moving forward, where ignoring or not responding to my input can cause me to fixate until I recognize what I’m doing and break myself out of it. But if I feel mild validation, even if it is conclude…
Just to be contrary, it's possible that you're reading too much into other people's responses if you're actually beating yourself up in the middle of the night about what someone meant or didn't. Check out existential therapy. I'm not saying this to pathologize or minimize what you're saying, just that it's something I used to suffer from before I realized via (said therapy) that everyone else is just a narcissistic…
It’s a way of closing the loop, mentally. It allows me to move on and not have this subconscious stress nagging at me for weeks after a significant interaction.
But yeah I’ll look into existential therapy. Thanks!
The only advantage I see at beeing humble is that it does not offend people with low self-esteem. One only needs to say to be good at something or to be proud of something to trigger some people. More so in Europe than in the States I think.