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Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

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11–20 of 72 posts

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#11
"My late teens and early 20’s were influenced by the so-called Intellectual Dark Web - Jordan Peterson, Joe Rogan, Sam Harris and the like."

Given your influences, I'm amazed you've not only recognized this issue, but chose to address it. Even the most liberal among my peers (who are older and grew up without them) hasn't taken this stance. I wonder how you broke free of the "edgelord" bubble and gained this perspective.

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#12
post #4

Hey everyone, OP here. I know this can be a somewhat controversial topic, so I'm keen to hear your perspectives on inclusive language and inclusion in general. Thanks for stumbling upon my post :)

The webster dictionary literally says: Guys - PERSON —used in plural to refer to the members of a group regardless of sex.

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#13
post #6

/u/tomquirk - thanks so kindly for posting this. As a trans woman in IT I couldn’t appreciate this post more at this time, nor do I think it’s ever been more relevant. Might I suggest you consider adding - and I put here for HN’s convenience as well — a list of potential great alternatives? :) ‘Hey folks’ ‘Hey everyone’ ‘Hey y’all’ ‘Hey team:’ Even just ‘Hey -‘ I also like ‘Good morning’, ‘Good afternoon’, ‘Good even…

I'm so glad you feel this way! And thanks for your suggestion. I'll definitely do a follow-up post on good alternatives to commonly used non-inclusive phrases. This tweet by the Women in Tech SEO community covers some great alternatives to "guys" - https://twitter.com/techseowomen/status/1317545475021701126 reply

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#14
I coached girls recreation basketball and found it weird (after a lifetime of playing basketball) to say "guard your man" or "find your man" etc. "guard your woman" and "guard your girl" also didn't "sound right" although that could be as a result of my bias.

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#15
please... please stop. i really don't care for all this inclusive language crap and all it is is an attempt to shame people. if you get that easily offended by the way people talk you need to look deep at yourself and see what is the true reason for it. maybe you have deep down self trauma, anger issues or something else that needs to be sort out in therapy. btw... there is _nothing_ wrong in admitting that you have a problem and getting help for it.

what's even funnier is that this whole inclusive language shaming is something i only see in the tech world. perhaps this is because this industry is more ego centric than any other industry, i don't know, but i know a slew of people in the financial world who roll their eyes every time i have conversations about this.

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#19

please... please stop. i really don't care for all this inclusive language crap and all it is is an attempt to shame people. if you get that easily offended by the way people talk you need to look deep at yourself and see what is the true reason for it. maybe you have deep down self trauma, anger issues or something else that needs to be sort out in therapy. btw... there is _nothing_ wrong in admitting that you have…

I appreciate your opinion. And maybe there is some truth to your statement.

But in the professional context, none of that really matters IMO. If someone in your team is offended (and yes, it might seem stupid to you), then the dynamic of the team is thrown off. And ultimately, productivity suffers. That's how I'm thinking about it these days.

Re: Why I've stopped saying 'hey guys' (as a male in tech)

#20
I remember when the big all hands meetings started to start with ,,hey team''. It was strange and unnatural to me.

For me a team is a group of about 5 people working together to achieve a clear goal, going to lunch together almost every day, having coffee together, while talking about solving deep technical issues. It doesn't scale to more than 8 people, because I'm just not able to understand deeply what more than 8 people are doing, and follow their code base.

It was the same time when all hands meetings got political and uninteresting, skipping all the technical details on announcements that made them interesting (and that made cross-team collaboration possible), and I just stopped going to these meetings, because they started to be just a waste of my time.

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