Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

11–20 of 141 posts

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#11

Post by nao360 »

In the words of Eric Cartman's Karate instructor, "You rak dishiprin!"

What you have to realise (not just understand conceptually) is that anything worth doing -- anything significant in your life -- requires hard work. Now, before anyone here drops to the floor in a fit of cliche-driven convulsion, let me explain 'hard work'. Hard work is about being consistent and doing the same thing every day. Learning to speak and write another language fluently is not hard work; hard work is practicing every day for 5 years. Running 5k is not hard work; hard work is running every day regardless of how you feel, or what kind of a day you've had, or what the weather is like outside.

> I'm trying to organize myself to wake up @6am and go through journaling > meditating > work > exercise or read. However, I often find out I'm kind of overwhelmed or I can't spend qualitative time in my relationship / don't have time to do other chores.

Slow down, and take a few steps back. You're not ready to manage so many goals (nobody is in the beginning). Pick one thing, just one, from your list -- whichever you enjoy the most. Can you do it every day for a month? Doesn't matter if you don't feel well, or you don't have time, or you're not feeling motivated: can you do this one thing, every day, for a month? This is discipline. This is the 'hard' in 'hard work'. Doesn't have to be a month; it could be 3 weeks or 13 weeks, it doesn't matter, it just needs to be long enough for you to realise that you've always had it in you, and that consistency is the key to achievement.

And, if you fail? So simple: start over. I've failed so many times that I think the universe is running out of failure modes for me. Keep at it. Keep going. Be consistent.

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#12

Post by falcor84 »

nao360 wrote: post #11

In the words of Eric Cartman's Karate instructor, "You rak dishiprin!" What you have to realise (not just understand conceptually) is that anything worth doing -- anything significant in your life -- requires hard work. Now, before anyone here drops to the floor in a fit of cliche-driven convulsion, let me explain 'hard work'. Hard work is about being consistent and doing the same thing every day. Learning to speak a…

Well said. I'll just add this quote from the running baboon in Bojack Horseman:

"It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day — that’s the hard part. But it does get easier"

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#14

Post by jmpman »

I used to think that making it to the gym daily was impossible with my schedule. Then I joined a workout challenge/bet with some friends. I quickly found that I could always find 30min in a day for exercise, it was just prioritization. I despise working out, and yet I could get it done. So, now, when I have another task I need to accomplish that will only take 30 minutes, and I’ve found myself putting it off because “there’s not enough time”, I now know it’s just an excuse. But as others have said, prioritize what you want to accomplish. Do one consistently, then add a second, etc. You’ll eventually find a breaking point. We all do. Today, mine is somewhere after cooking breakfast, and before unloading the dishwasher.

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#15

Post by paulcole »

I mean either pick something and do it or don’t? If you really wanted to do any of those things you’d be doing them instead of not doing them.

It’s fine to accomplish nothing. It’s all pointless anyway. If doing nothing is what you’re prioritizing, just accept it.

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#16

Post by todd3834 »

I found something that works really well for me. I don’t wait until I “find” time to do the things I want to do. I create a calendar and a routine and I “make” time for them. This also allowed me to have a conversation with my wife about these things and we made compromises on a reasonable balance. This way I’m able to make time for my family as well. It can be a little hectic to always be living on a schedule that I made for myself but each week feels so productive that it seems to suit my personality well. The downside, and it’s possibly a really big downside, is my life seems to be flashing by so fast. This kind of worries me but I’m just not the kind of person who can make well with idle time.

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#17

Post by mattlondon »

Consider scheduling changes. E.g. I used to find it really hard to exercise after a day at work, then I changed to exercise in the mornings instead and suddenly I had much less trouble motivating myself.

Also consider trimming down the amount you are trying to do until you are in a routine - can't find time for journalling and meditation and exercise? Start with just one of those and move from there when you are in the habit.

Can you combine some activities? E.g. replace commute with biking to work? Or read while commuting?

Good luck

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#18

Post by bwb »

I do pretty often check-ins to make sure I am doing the things I want and have the priorities I want to have. It is hard and a struggle always, but with some nudges to stay on point it seems to work :)

And, be kind to myself when I fall out of whack and need to make some adjustments.

Re: Ask HN: How do you maintain balance between all the things you want to do?

#19

Post by fkdo »

I use to be hyper motivated and constantly working towards a goal. I worked full time, went to graduate school, ran a small business (~10k annual revenue), maintained an exercise routine (3hr/week) and did household chores like cleaning and cooking(4hr/week). My total scheduled time towards those goals every week was 110-120 hours and I slept 5-6 hours every night. I remember scheduling one meal a week to eat while not commuting/working and one night a month to see friends.

I burnt out. At first the lesson I learned was that I can only do so many things, and I always get a full night sleep and I never let my schedule get near that full. Now, five years after I stopped that lifestyle I find that the things I do spend time on I do even better. I'm performing at a higher level. I think it's because I'm less stressed because I'm not constantly pushing myself. I work when it's time to work and play when it's time to play.

You cannot do all of the things that you want to do. You're time is finite. Your energy and passion are finite. Accept this. Internalize this. My advice is to pick one or two things you really care about. Devote all your passion there, but don't devote all of your time. You need some time to relax and you need some unstructured time. If you don't give yourself unstructured time you'll take it by procrastination.

Post reply on HN