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How the Finnish survive without small talk

bbc.com

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Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#11

Post by lasagnaphil »

jpatokal wrote: post #6
throwaway487548 wrote: post #3

Oh, come on. Most parts of Asia have no notion of a small talk, moreover, it is considered impolite and sometimes even silly. Only almost formal, exceedingly polite and necessary conversations are part of the social norm, and you see, it is OK for a few billions or so.

> Only almost formal, exceedingly polite and necessary conversations are part of the social norm This does not describe Finland at all. If you go to a convenience store in Japan and buy a pack of gum, the clerk will go through an elaborate script of welcoming you to the store, reciting how much your purchase costs, how much cash they receive from you, how much change they give you in return, and thanking you for your…

I think the Japanese clerk’s elaborate script is just an educated formality rather than a sincere conversation...

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#12

Post by Insanity »

I first completely read this as "smalltalk" and was quite confused.

I'm quite bad at small talk but I try to 'force' it as it is seen as something common where I live. My wife usually does tell me that I'm bad at it if she happens to be with me.

I'm not sure why, there's just a lot of awkward pauses.

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#13

Post by dudul »

unwind wrote: post #10

Swedish has the same saying, but it's the other way around ("tala är silver men tiga är guld", literally "talking is silver but silence is gold"). It makes more sense like that to me, but perhaps the article just got it wrong

Not just the Swedes, the same saying exists in France.

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#14

Post by mtgx »

buboard wrote: post #8

[flagged]

Or maybe just a climate thing? I find I want to talk much less when my face is freezing. In the long term I imagine this could have easily turned into a habit/cultural thing. You also hear about Latin American people being much "warmer" and friendly, etc.

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#15

Post by chrisseaton »

lasagnaphil wrote: post #11
jpatokal wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Only almost formal, exceedingly polite and necessary conversations are part of the social norm This does not describe Finland at all. If you go to a convenience store in Japan and buy a pack of gum, the clerk will go through an elaborate script of welcoming you to the store, reciting how much your purchase costs, how much cash they receive from you, how much change they give you in return, and thanking you for your…

I think the Japanese clerk’s elaborate script is just an educated formality rather than a sincere conversation...

> just an educated formality rather than a sincere conversation

So small talk, then.

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#16

Post by holstvoogd »

dudul wrote: post #13
unwind wrote: post #10

Swedish has the same saying, but it's the other way around ("tala är silver men tiga är guld", literally "talking is silver but silence is gold"). It makes more sense like that to me, but perhaps the article just got it wrong

Not just the Swedes, the same saying exists in France.

and Holland too

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#18

Post by bluetomcat »

throwaway487548 wrote: post #3

Oh, come on. Most parts of Asia have no notion of a small talk, moreover, it is considered impolite and sometimes even silly. Only almost formal, exceedingly polite and necessary conversations are part of the social norm, and you see, it is OK for a few billions or so.

A similar kind of formality used to be a thing in Western culture, at least up until the 1980s.

Watch any kind of TV show from back then and notice the formality in the clothing of presenters, the substantially more discernible pronunciation, the vocabulary. The cultural shift towards informality is a recent trend in the West.

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#19

Post by mrhappyunhappy »

lasagnaphil wrote: post #11
jpatokal wrote: post #6

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Only almost formal, exceedingly polite and necessary conversations are part of the social norm This does not describe Finland at all. If you go to a convenience store in Japan and buy a pack of gum, the clerk will go through an elaborate script of welcoming you to the store, reciting how much your purchase costs, how much cash they receive from you, how much change they give you in return, and thanking you for your…

I think the Japanese clerk’s elaborate script is just an educated formality rather than a sincere conversation...

It's not even a formality, the response is mostly automated. They are taught to do this but after a while it just becomes something they say without thinking much. Part of it is so the boss is happy. If the boss sees employee not following the script they can get some serious talking.

Re: How the Finnish survive without small talk

#20

Post by jacquesm »

dudul wrote: post #13
unwind wrote: post #10

Swedish has the same saying, but it's the other way around ("tala är silver men tiga är guld", literally "talking is silver but silence is gold"). It makes more sense like that to me, but perhaps the article just got it wrong

Not just the Swedes, the same saying exists in France.

And Dutch:

Spreken is zilver, zwijgen is goud.

German:

Reden ist Silber, Schweigen ist Gold.

And probably many other languages besides. Proverbs are usually not limited to a single language though they may change subtly in translation.

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