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Stop Leaning In. Put Down Your IPhone. And HELP ME.

kirstensamazing.com

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Re: Stop Leaning In. Put Down Your IPhone. And HELP ME.

#5
It's the bystander effect - this is why you always ask specific people to help. Myself, I like to think I'd have helped if I was there, but I know how easy that is to say, even if I am certainly someone who should. Many people who were there probably feel terrible that they didn't, but sometimes in an emergency, people who haven't thought about what they'd do will freeze up.

Re: Stop Leaning In. Put Down Your IPhone. And HELP ME.

#6
It's not a mobile phone thing; I got punched in the face on a commuter train 20 years ago and none of the crowd got involved then either.

It's partly bystander effect ("I'll leave it to someone else to intervene") and partly a very real fear of the intervention going wrong. Maybe you get stabbed. Maybe the police get involved and you end up with an assault conviction and consequent expulsion from the middle class. Maybe the scene isn't all it seems (setup for robbery, or domestic where both parties turn on the intervenor).

Commuting and the mass-population city kind of relies on us forming the habit of studiously ignoring one another, and it's a hard habit to shake in an emergency.

Re: Stop Leaning In. Put Down Your IPhone. And HELP ME.

#8
one other challenge may be that in San Francisco there's so many crazy homeless people, you never know what could happen. I saw a homeless guy fall over in front of a bus last week and waited a few seconds, no body did something; I was just about to go other to help pick the guy up, but good job I didn't - as he was just crazy - got up and started trashing all the trashcans around him etc.

Re: Stop Leaning In. Put Down Your IPhone. And HELP ME.

#9
this is a well known phenomenon called the "bystander effect"

wikipedia entry here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bystander_effect

long story short, what's going on in people's minds when they don't help is that, probably someone else will step in, and playing hero will probably just get in the way.

which, isn't that helpful if 100% of the bystanders are thinking that. It's somebody else's problem.

there's a simple remedy- Don't scream "help! anyone! help!" scream "Hey you, burly looking dude. Help! yes you!" ' This is what psychologists say. until the evidence comes in, I'm skeptical that it would work. but it's better than repeating these stories again and again.

Re: Stop Leaning In. Put Down Your IPhone. And HELP ME.

#10
post #4

Give her the phone! GIVE HER THE PHONE!! edit: OK, I'm being downvoted. That's fine. But, why put your irreplaceable life in mortal danger for the sake of keeping hold of replaceable consumer electronics? That's the disconnect I'm finding hard to process.

Does it matter? What do you intend to gain from that discussion?
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