Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
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Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#2MIT is FAR from the only offender here, so much so that I find it odd to be calling MIT out in particular.
And abuse takes a lot of forms. My advisor once went eighteen months without ever laying eyes on one of his doctoral students.
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#3On that subject, from 24 years ago:
> I need from you a few paragraphs describing your personal interests,
> advising style or philosophy, background and professional interests.
> ... I'm preparing a document to give the freshman for them to use to
> select an advisor. I need to receive your info by early next week.
I was born and raised in Atlanta, Georgia, majored in mathematics and Computer
Science at Yale University, and I got my PhD in Computer Science at CMU. I've
lived in Paris, Hong Kong, Peking, and New Jersey.
I tend to look for weak, uncertain students and feed off of their
insecurities; by preying on their poor self-images, I manage to temporarily
assuage my own feelings of inadequacy and failure. I've also found
undergraduate advising to be a terrific vehicle for venting a lot
of my own pent-up rage and frustration.
I'm not sure if this counts as a philosophy, but it's the closest thing I've
got to an "advising style."
> Thanks again for volunteering to advise!
My pleasure.Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#4MIT is FAR from the only offender here, so much so that I find it odd to be calling MIT out in particular. And abuse takes a lot of forms. My advisor once went eighteen months without ever laying eyes on one of his doctoral students.
>so much so that I find it odd to be calling MIT out in particular.
Because the author is relaying their personal experiences as a student at MIT.
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#5This is especially harder for international students because they are likely entering a new educational system and dont know what is the right thing to do in this scenario.
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#6IHTFP: alive and well, apparently.
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#7> Too often I have been told to be proud of the great work I am a part of, as if this should outweigh the negative and harmful things myself and others have experienced.
Actually, that's how it works in the real world from my experience.
Most geniuses have terrible shadows that are as dark and long as they are brilliant and tall.
Most of us feel really lucky to get things done and be a part of something, and when we have to bear an unkind comment here or there... well, we're emotionally developed adults who balance the positive with the negative. It takes a lot of entitlement to expect to never hear anything negative or offensive or unkind.*
College should prepare you for the real world, not shelter you from it.
* Obligatory before someone makes a strawman: Of course if the advisor does something illegal, that's another matter, but the article never stated anything illegal being done. Just unkind from what I read.
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#8On that subject, from 24 years ago: > I need from you a few paragraphs describing your personal interests, > advising style or philosophy, background and professional interests. > ... I'm preparing a document to give the freshman for them to use to > select an advisor. I need to receive your info by early next week. I was born and raised in Atlanta, Georgia, majored in mathematics and Computer Science at Yale Univers…
is there any more context to this? All I could find is this:
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#9> Too often I have been told to be proud of the great work I am a part of, as if this should outweigh the negative and harmful things myself and others have experienced. Actually, that's how it works in the real world from my experience. Most geniuses have terrible shadows that are as dark and long as they are brilliant and tall. Most of us feel really lucky to get things done and be a part of something, and when we…
That is just a terrible terrible thing to say to excuse abuse. You cant expect others to toil away to benefit your "genius".
Re: Abuse isn’t an “advising style”: Consequences of MIT sheltering abusive mentors
#10MIT is FAR from the only offender here, so much so that I find it odd to be calling MIT out in particular. And abuse takes a lot of forms. My advisor once went eighteen months without ever laying eyes on one of his doctoral students.
For what it's worth, I've actually been warned against their physics department for grad school. The other rumour I heard is that Harvard is even worse (for physics grad students). Tons of toxic behaviour like sabotaging labmates in the name of competition and advisors holding onto students for like a year after they should have graduated to pump out that last paper from them.