Earlier quoted context omitted.
You're correct that some soldering irons (especially uber-cheap ones) are shit, but Pinecil proves cheap can also be good. Past a certain point, soldering becomes a hobby about how dangerous you're willing to get to make things easier on yourself. You can swap out non-toxic solder for lead trace if you want a cleaner board; then there are high-wattage irons, board reflow/fluxing, and even all sorts of scale-specific…
You seen knowledgeable. I've used leaded solder in my bedroom / apartments since community college, usually with a fan in the room or a window open. What damage could have or has happened?
The biggest danger that's specific to leaded solder is accidental ingestion. Both the common methods of cleaning your iron (damp sponge and brass wool) produce many tiny little balls of solder. They're difficult to see, and because they're round and dense they easily roll and bounce to unexpected places. They can get caught in your clothes and potentially end up falling in food.
The fumes are flux fumes, not lead fumes. They're still bad to breathe but not specific to leaded solder.