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Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

didyouregretit.com

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Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#21

Post by sriram_malhar »

I think regrets are somewhat of a pointless exercise (that is, there are exceptions, but much fewer than seems to be the assumption)

One takes a decision considering:

1. the best information available,

2. the sum total of your fears and complexes.

3. sometimes picking a choice without a clear cut set of criteria to make an informed decision.

Years later, what's the point regretting it? It means that you are now perhaps a different person, maybe more secure. Maybe you have information now that wasn't available to you then. Maybe you have grown to be the kind of person that can now make sense of the information that was given then. If the conditions were replicated (including your internal state), you'd likely make the same decisions.

You should of course reflect on it to learn and grow, and in particular, make amends if you wronged someone. But there is little point in dwelling on the past and saying, "if only ..."

Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#22

Post by wruza »

temp3000 wrote: post #17
wruza wrote: post #14

I'd add inverse options. E.g. I decided to not buy a house and now I'm regretting it. The reason is rent was cheap in my area. Now it's ~3x the past bank interest. I was creditworthy at all times but chose to avoid unnecessary expenses, lol.

I don’t regret buying a house but I assumed I would. The great house price crash was waiting for me to buy, so I thought… still it is a shallow win to see others suffering with rent prices.

I was avoiding living on the edge all my life, so it doesn’t hit that hard, but yeah, all housing markets are insane atm. I feel for those who only start living nowadays.

Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#23

Post by cheschire »

jemmyw wrote: post #10

This misses a lot of nuance. The decisions are yes/no on regret and an extremely short reason. These aren't going to help others make reasoned decisions about things. You can't really help with that anyway, because you're just setting someone up to write in the future "I wanted X but I read about someone else who regretted it. But now I regret not doing it because I'm not them." For example, I once quit my salaried j…

People suck at understanding their reasons for or consequences of their life decisions.

Keep it short. Leave out the misguided attempts at self analysis.

Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#26

Post by jonplackett »

The problem this data will have is it’ll just be two extreme points of view. Some people regret heavily, some heavily glad. Anyone in between probably not represented because they can’t be bothered to express an opinion.

I saw a sign recently that just read “success is very similar to failure” and I absolutely agree.

The difference in your life and happiness between getting what you want and not is often much smaller than you expect.

Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#27

Post by thsnyder »

wruza wrote: post #14

I'd add inverse options. E.g. I decided to not buy a house and now I'm regretting it. The reason is rent was cheap in my area. Now it's ~3x the past bank interest. I was creditworthy at all times but chose to avoid unnecessary expenses, lol.

Great idea! I need to go through my Decisions list and iterate on it.

Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#29

Post by thsnyder »

cipheredStones wrote: post #5
thsnyder wrote: post #2

Hi, A question others often ask me when I'm struggling with a decision is "will you regret it?" And that simple paradigm can make the answer clear. But sometimes, I'm not sure. Sometimes, it seems like the options are equivalent – 6 one, half a dozen the other. That got me curious about what other decisions people have made and whether they regret those decisions and why. So, I made Did You Regret It – a directory of…

Interesting concept, but a point on the design: it's quite unclear whether the "reasoning" part is supposed to be "why you did it", "why you do/don't regret it", or both.

Ah, great point! I may rename that field so it’s more clear. Thanks!

Re: Show HN: I built a directory about big life decisions/regrets

#30

Post by thsnyder »

jemmyw wrote: post #10

This misses a lot of nuance. The decisions are yes/no on regret and an extremely short reason. These aren't going to help others make reasoned decisions about things. You can't really help with that anyway, because you're just setting someone up to write in the future "I wanted X but I read about someone else who regretted it. But now I regret not doing it because I'm not them." For example, I once quit my salaried j…

Everyone’s experience of life is different, so there’s almost no universal advice to begin with. Buuut it is interesting to read about people’s reasoning, experiences, and their own thought process.
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