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Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

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Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#1
Hi,

I'm a 25 years old developer who has started to learn programming for fun 11 years ago (and at that time, I loved it). I was bored when I studied computing in university and it get worse when I started working professionally 2 years ago, to such an extent that I quit my job because I didn't found myself to be enough happy.

Even if I left it with my head full of projects, a month and a half later, I can't find enough motivation for starting these. I don't think that I can work alone and furthermore, I'm starting to ask myself if I'm really meant for programming.

How can I enjoy programming again?

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#2
I would say, try to work on something that you might actually find fun, for myself when I am tired of boring projects I make little games. It's something I really like and keeps the mind active. But sometimes it's also good to take a total pause. If you really feels that you can't work on anything try to stop thinking about it, look at other things to do, some other stimulating projects like a DIY. One last thing could be, don't stay alone, find a co-working place, or a bar, or something where you can stay in touch with people, this is often underestimated but important.

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#3
Stop thinking about projects and try to remember what made you happy back when you started programming. Chances are the path the university and the job you had made you take, isn't what you really wanted, and you didn't find anything exciting about it, hence the boredom and unhappiness.

Keep in mind that this is common, people get bored all the time, but they get over it and so will you. This is just a phase of introspection you are going through.

Don't start with the prospect of creating something that will make money or be starred by thousands, because that might put you off.

Find what would be fun for you to do, or something useful in your daily life and that you'll enjoy looking at it and using it and the motivation will come and things will start rolling again. Maybe also try doing that in a new fun language or framework you were meaning to try out but never had the chance to.

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#4
If you want, you might get in touch with me. Projects are always better when they're being done for/with someone else, and maybe we have overlapping interests. Reply to me if that's your will.

I want to share one comment about distraction where I like the way novelist/nerdfighter John Green put it: "This is a common problem because the easiest thing for us to do is whatever we are currently doing -- which is usually nothing."

If you understand will, resolve, transformation, interaction, and love, then you can choose what you find fun. But when you don't have that understanding, then you reach a point where your ambitions are loftier than your one-shot ability is, so your target projects are bigger than one-weekend coding binges. This makes it very hard to focus on those projects, which I think feels like boredom even though it's not.

To answer your own question, I enjoy programming on several different levels. For example, there is the affective level. I now have a remote server running FreeBSD, and whenever there is a software update, you have to recompile whatever's in the ports. It always makes me giddy (which is an emotion, an affect) to type some small "make install" command and then text flies by on my screen. It's very hard to explain what this emotion comes from. It's halfway "it's working!" and halfway a sort of pride that I am making some computer somewhere do something big and complicated for me. In any case it feels power-mad and exciting, like I have minions who serve my every whim.

On another level there is the abstract appreciation. I really like sort of the mathematics of programming, by which I mean distilling some complicated idea to a really pure and simple form. How does the server work? Well, everything that I want to be able to do is a service -- the very simplest unit, with a uniform syntax for simple-syntax requests and responses, you just start off by writing "here are the things that I expect to be able to do" and fill in the code stubs. I love the moments where I get to do that. I've written the Fibonacci numbers as a matrix exponentiation just to figure out what the actual time bound is in the "O(1) algorithm" (It turns out that it's also O(N^2) just like the naive summation algorithm, which for large numbers will add up N N-bit numbers, it just has a slightly smaller constant.)

The abstract appreciation is also why I really like refactors; the cleaner the code gets the happier I am.

Finally, I think there is a creative appreciation. I appreciated programming my base-10 clock (shameless plug: http://drostie.org/time/ ) not because it was a technically difficult task but because I got to build a machine which just had not existed. It was the same thing with switching to Linux, where I have a more personal relationship with my laptop because I've taken the time and effort to care for it.

I really believe that there is a simple formula -- that patience plus symbolism together create real meaning, because they both emerge from a sort of harmony. Of course there is a longstanding philosophical problem that this meaning, while real, is incomplete -- but I view that as a fundamental issue in life. Anyway, take care, work on a project with raw symbolic potential, and just be patient with it -- then you'll find the results meaningful and enjoy the task. Just walk into your office one day saying "I am just spending the next hour on this project." It can be quite liberating.

Maybe we can talk more, if you're interested.

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#5
Put yourself in a situation where you couldn't program (other than to think about problems ) even if you wanted to.

Hiking, cross-country skiing, raft trips, etc. all work well for this.

The main thing is to get away from the computer for a time, and to not be able to reach for the keyboard whenever you have an idea.

Over all though, it sounds like you're going through a phase of burnout. And that's more difficult to deal with. Try some radically different types of problems; if you've been doing front-end web dev go deep on bit-twiddling for a while or pick a random topic that's way outside your comfort zone and see if you can bring it into your skill-set.

Also, taking a break from programming for a while is a perfectly legitimate thing to do.

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#6
It might be that your programming the wrong kind of projects or a language that you don't enjoy.

When I started out I was working on Java in very nasty codebases - it turned out that wasn't enjoyable for me - once I changed platforms I remembered why that it could be enjoyable.

For me it was about doing projects with nice quick feedback (e.g. just playing with pygame, or building things for the mobile platform of the day).

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#8
I think you're suffering from burnout, something I suffer from at least twice a year. The last thing I want to do during this time is sit in front of a computer, even though - like you - my head is full of ideas and projects. It hurts for me to get out of bed, much like depression, I feel worthless like I'm unable to do my job anymore because it pains me too much.

What I do is start running more, once a night/morning, take the dog for a longer walk, go out to the cinema, meet some friends for a pizza or something. Basically taking my mind away from projects whilst getting fresh air, socialising and being active. During this time I tend to get headaches often, but I NEVER take medicines as they seem to make me feel down again. Spending time outside and getting myself fresh air is the best remedy, takes longer, but it's more natural and feels rewarding.

Talking about rewards, another thing that works for me is rewarding myself with mini-achievements. "I'm going to run 3 miles today. And if I do, we'll have a pizza." any reward except computers. After a week or two - depending on how burnt out I am - I feel the urge to get back on a computer and start working again.

I hope the above helps :) It takes a lot of time to find the right remedy for getting yourself through burnout, but time and time again I've read people saying "just get off the computer and out and about" it works, even thought it can be a pain to motivate yourself at first.

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#9
Do you enjoy programming, or do you enjoy projects? They're not necessarily the same thing - remember that you don't have to do all the programming on a project yourself, you can outsource to other developers, either in part or completely. Maybe you like imagining & creating products more than the nitty-gritty of actually writing classes & choosing algorithms?

Re: Ask HN: I lost my will to program. How can I get it back?

#10
Programming is a tool for expressing, realizing, or creating. With it, you express ideas and yourself in a unique way. The simple thought that, with programming, I can bring into existence something big keeps me grinning already. When working, I think of it as me bringing to existence ideas in behalf of my company. A pretty cool ability. How I usually see programming is that it can change the world.

As for you, take a break from programming and see if you miss it and what you miss about it. They do say you don't know what you got till its gone.

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