Ask HN: Has anyone here turned around their life in their 40s?

I know the best of my life is behind me, but I need help salvaging what's left of it. I've been meaning to ask for help for a couple of years now, but only now got around to it after being scared by my first real suicidal ideation a few nights ago. HN is probably not a suitable platform for this, but /r/advice seems to be not very active and I can't post on /adv/ due to some IP range ban. There are no mental health facilities in the small town where I live. I let my professional network decay and die, and there is literally nowhere else I can get any kind of useful, actionable advice.

I'm a 43-years-old single guy, NEET for the past decade. I got my Master's in the US in the late 2000s and was gainfully employed there for a few years (NOT in my field of education; long story) until I had to return to my home country to take care of my ailing father. He passed on within a year of my return, leaving my family with a financial mess, and his death took a lot out of me. I still obviously miss him, but in wallowing in depression and self-pity, I let the prime of my life pass me by.

As I stand, I have no current skills related to either my education (MEng) or my previous work experience (BI Reporting/Analytics). I don't have ideas/skills/network for entrepreneurship.

I had all the desires of a regular guy: a wife, kids, a house, meaningful work, etc. I mean I still do, but I guess I'm too late for the first few. Every night I promise myself to do/be better tomorrow and somehow get myself to sleep. I was once looked up to, now I'm a pity case and an example case of how not to throw one's life away.

With every passing day, I am becoming more bitter, angry and disillusioned. I don't want to live like this anymore, but I don't know how to even _start_ thinking of ways to get myself out of this hole.

Ideally, I would prefer to go back to the US; not only for the dollars (they're nice), but also because I actually was happy there. I'd do all the things that I didn't do enough of because I was focused on saving money and because I thought that there would always be time for them when I was more stable/settled.

The good: No diseases AFAIK, no vices at all other than severe procrastination and a masterful ability to lie to myself. I have ~US$25k-equivalent in salary savings from a decade ago.

Sorry if the above text is rambling and not very cohesive. I've probably also skipped over some useful information I should have provided. Please do ask. I'll take some time reflecting on your replies and then respond. Thank you.

A lot of these are examples of people that built up a career and finally had a (lucky) breakout. Doesn't sound like OP.

Potentially risking downvotes, since religion makes people uncomfortable, but since you mentioned mental health services are lacking, have you tried joining a local church? Priests are the original therapists, and it’s a great way to meet people.

It’s not for everyone, but if you’re struggling to find meaning in your own life, perhaps looking up is the answer?

Masters in US implies the OP has a past history of completing non-trivial projects. Built career is just a narrative that HR and investors like. Humans can learn quite fast lots of useful things. This is not a statement "everyone can become world champion" but rather, you don't need to become world champion to find contentment and happiness in life. Growth mentality is the key.

My mother in law lost her business at 45 as a hairdresser, lost most of her savings and had to redo her life entirely, she ended up taking a class and switching to caring for disabled/mentally challenged? people in a sort of nursing/living facility, it completely changed her for the better (no stress or anxiety) maybe you need to flip the script aswell?