Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong? • Hacker News Board

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#961

Post by serverholic » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:55 PM UTC

laura_g wrote: post #144

xyzelement wrote: post #19

I used to assume the religious people were missing something and missing out on the latest and greatest. Now I am seeing that often it's us the non-religious that have lost something of value and are trying to replace it with things that don't work as well.

There are a lot of things religion provides that modern society is really dismal at providing: community, care, socialization across class/career lines, relationships with people who live near you, a support system for sick/hurting people, and other benefits The thing is, none of those are innately tied to religion. We've abandoned churches for what I feel are largely good reasons, but we haven't found something else…

I think you’re right. Religion isn’t the only answer, it’s just the answer that people are most familiar with.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#962

Post by Throwawayh89 » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 3:59 PM UTC

Self-doubt. Assume I was always the least intelligent person in the room.

Operated like Clarence Thomas did at oral arguments for close to a decade... Assumed that if something was worth asking someone else would ask it.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#963

Post by serverholic » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 4:02 PM UTC

vlunkr wrote: post #594

xyzelement wrote: post #19

I used to assume the religious people were missing something and missing out on the latest and greatest. Now I am seeing that often it's us the non-religious that have lost something of value and are trying to replace it with things that don't work as well.

As a religious person who has deeply considered leaving it, I've never understood the arrogance of some atheists. For me it was disturbing to try to internalize the ideas that the universe is uncaring, that good and evil are made up, that your consciousness is basically like the contents of a stick of RAM that will vanish when it loses its power source. Even the original "God is dead" quotes from Nietzsche sound mour…

I disagree that we’re undoing the moral underpinnings of society.

I think humans have an in-built moral compass but sometimes that compass gets warped and distorted by our environment.

Name a society that hasn’t valued love, friendship, family, etc.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#964

Post by giantg2 » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 4:13 PM UTC

AussieWog93 wrote: post #837

giantg2 wrote: post #257

"Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?" Worked hard believing it would be rewarded.

>Worked hard believing it would be rewarded. Even if you're not seeing the rewards of your hard work now, they will come one day. Let's say you've spent the last 10 years working your arse off for a shitty boss who doesn't appreciate you. At least you're far more competent than if you'd been lazy for 10 years under the same shitty boss. Go find a better situation and you'll be grateful for the skills you've picked up…

That would be true. But my situation was that I worked hard in an area that didn't have any real external opportunities (FileNet, then Neoxam). It had been about 8 years for me, and I still don't see any reward on the way.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#965

Post by smilliken » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 4:51 PM UTC

car wrote: post #751

Realizing that the food we commonly eat, like butter, meat and dairy, are the main source of cardiovascular diseases that are the prevailing cause of death in our society.

Elaborating for those that don't know: In the US, sugar is the leading cause of cardiovascular disease. Butter, meat, and animal products were Coca-Cola and others' scapegoat to deflect attention away from their sugary products. This was bad information that originated from a PR department. Like much of the common nutrition knowledge we have.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#966

Post by OJFord » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 4:54 PM UTC

machiaweliczny wrote: post #741

Standing. Turns out you shouldn’t be standing with locked knees. I learned it in my twentees. People with hyperlordosis have tendency to do that it seems.

It's also better advice for not fainting while standing long periods than rolling onto balls of feet and back to heels - the reason that works is that it forces you to unlock knees, if you can just unlock/bend slightly without doing that it's fine (and how you should be anyway as you say).

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#967

Post by pbronez » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 5:13 PM UTC

RGamma wrote: post #801

makach wrote: post #142

It was when I was younger, I was independent and living alone that I realized that I had the power to change myself. In order to succeed there was only one person responsible for my happiness and good fortune, myself. I had to stop waiting for good things to happen, and make sure that I took faith in my own hands. This has led me to change employment, often, but not that often. It has made me approach many challenges…

Ech.. the "everything's your fault" view is typically American, but it's also pretty unbalanced. Sure you have to do things, yet interdependence exists. Also there's plenty situations where shit's stacked against you by heritage/law/social order quite unnecessarily.

Yes and no. There are absolutely baseline random factors that have a big impact on your life. You could genetic predisposition to something unpleasant, be born into Money, have a skin tone that’s discriminated against, have birth citizenship in a nation with a great social safety net. Lots of factors that can go either way.

We underestimate the importance of positive factors and overestimate the importance of negative factors. I think the best approach to dealing with this is:

1) practice Gratitude for the foundational positives

2) accept the foundational negatives

3) Embrace your sphere of control and deliberately choose compounding actions that build on the strengths and mitigate the weaknesses to improve your life.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#968

Post by karmakurtisaani » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 5:17 PM UTC

jaqalopes wrote: post #298

KVFinn wrote: post #2

You aren't supposed to rinse your mouth with water after brushing your teeth. You're supposed to spit excess, but leave the toothpaste on to absorb.

This is one where I KNOW I do it wrong. The dentist prescribed me a hardcore sensitivity toothpaste for an issue, but emphasized that it will only work if I don't rinse after brushing. But... I just can't not rinse after 30 years of muscle memory. I generally remember this right as I'm rinsing. The sensitivity toothpaste has not worked, of course.

If you remember it as you're rinsing, brush your teeth lightly again to spread the tooth paste on the teeth. Once you've had yo do it again a few times, you'll pick up the habit of not rinsing.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#969

Post by driverdan » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 5:33 PM UTC

015a wrote: post #710

achenatx wrote: post #578

Ive modestly tried to lose weight my whole life. Ive never been fat, but still had to work to keep my calories low. Im 5' 9", and it took 10 years to go from 170 to more like 160. Losing weight made me weaker and caused me to lose muscle. Ive recently started weightlifting for strength (low reps high weights) and the mindset is totally different. With weightlifting to keep your lifts going up you have to eat more. On…

Any advice/links on getting started lifting?

Besides the other good suggestions, having a personal trainer demonstrate exercises and work with you to get the proper form is extremely helpful.

I worked out for years learning it myself, even doing a bodybuilding competition. I then had a personal trainer for a few weeks through work and discovered part of my squat form was wrong. It wasn't causing harm but was holding back my gains and did increase my risk of injury.

Re: Ask HN: Something you’ve done your whole life that you realized is wrong?

#970

Post by jkmcf » Tue, Jan 31, 2023, 5:51 PM UTC

Realizing one needs to move their 401k plans when you leave a job or incur higher fees and potentially stagnant growth.

Also, it appears Roth IRAs need you to pick an investment option, but when I created one I don't recall there being an option. Invested ~3k and many moons later it was still ~3k.