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Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

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Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#91
I've also more or less organically grown into a management kind of role at my previous job, and I regret some of that. I did miss out on a lot of experience I could have had building things. At some point I worked hard to return to a developer role again, which partly succeeded, but this was also a somewhat larger company.

For my current job, I intentionally applied for a developer role, not a management one. What really helps is to be part of a team which has a decent lead - I knew from the interview that was the case at my current job.

If you don't work 'under' a decent enough lead, you end up picking up the pieces and doing his/her work. So my number one advice would be to make sure you end up working for a strong lead. If you want to stay where you are, you need to have a conversation, but not just about changing roles but also about hiring a lead to take your place. Otherwise I doubt its going to work.

My second point of advice is more of a reassurance: it is not childish to not want to be a manager, its actually very mature to recognize that this is not what makes you happy. I see it as a different job, not a higher one. Good tech managers probably need some tech background, but they don't have to be really good developers - just enough to understand their job as managers. But a good developer isn't by extension a good manager, that is really another skillset.

Somehow becoming a manager has been really sticky for me, you have to work to get it off. Maybe this is because I ended up taking responsibility where others didn't or couldn't, and then other people around me started calling that leadership and thus I became a manager even if I didn't want to.

Now I do understand why managers are getting paid more, its hard and sometimes stressful work to be honest.

Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#92
Those who find a way to reshape their identity and expectations around work are the ones who succeed in management and reap the financial rewards.

You must decide if this is what you want, else have grace on yourself and let go of the financial upside to spend more of your time doing hands-on work.

If you were building a house, would you rather be the crew chief or the electrician?

Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#93
post #76

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Damn how does one find such gigs and do so in a sustainable way?

I've gotten a lot of gigs through this site. Sustainable? hahaha

Ha. Well true that sustainable is a very vague metric. Working out of a faang definitely puts you in comfort zone and as I get older I am trying to see how to wean off it and go independent (even if it is a bit more of a slog) so I can diversify more and really utilize more of myself. Retirement isn't close but isn't looking rosy either :)

Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#94

After watching several of my friends become managers, directors, and VPs, I got FOMO and finally said yes to the management track about 25 years of software development. After about 3 years of engineering management, I was absolutely miserable, almost not programming at all, and spending 6 or more hours per day making sure I was camera-ready for the next Zoom meeting. Fortunately I had an S-Corporation that lived in…

It's hilarious how you phrased "Fortunately I had an S-Corporation that lived in a binder on a shelf (and so can you for about $125 and a few mouse clicks)".

It's the weirdest thing to me this is how it can be but it's so real.

Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#95
There are several posts here recommending you talk to management and ask for your role to change while you remain in position. This can work, and may be worth pursuing - however it's not always appropriate. Some organisations will not be willing to make exceptions for you. They'll fear a domino effect where others make similar requests; some may frame your request as shirking, since managing people is part of the role; HR may need to get involved if your role spec changes; etc etc. Basically, it might cascade into a Big Deal. Only you can know if your organisation would be amenable to such a proposal.

Regardless, you should start looking for alternative places for work. If you broach this conversation the cat is out of the bag. If management are supportive, great. And if not, you're prepared. It's a good mental and professional exercise anyway, and may help you work out what a perfect role would look like.

A hopefully encouraging note: it's totally normal to find yourself in a role that involves work you don't enjoy, and it's totally normal to make changes to improve things. You can do it :) Good luck!

Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#96
A couple of years ago I was offered a team lead position after having been in development for 12 years (I regularly took on various other tasks/roles as well, that's how I got on their radar). It seemed like the natural step to take responsibility, grow, stretch, yadayada, you know what they say about personal/career goals. I completely underestimated just how much my intrinsic motivation would revolt against tasks that just don't fit, even though I could perform well enough and was commended for how I did as a manager both from my team and others. I went back to development a year later and didn't regret it. *)

One of the lightbulb moments for me was when I talked to a product owner and said that I just don't enjoy coordinating people/opinions/requirements (+ everything you listed) she replied that that's exactly what she finds enjoyable/fascinating. I understood then that there are simply limits to what you can "become" (in your essence) and I had to accept it. So I'm still just a "simple" backend engineer, I leave my mark in ways that don't involve a job title, often beyond the scope of my team. There are still moments when I observe managers and think "I can do that, too, and maybe even better, maybe I should...", but I quickly go back to remembering that I tried it once and don't need to prove anything to anybody anymore.

It sounds like you've endured this misalignment between your passions and your job for some time (how long exactly?) - don't do this to yourself unless you have some unavoidable pressures. The vested shares you mention, really worth it?

*) It was not at all this straight-forward, of course, I went through tremendous self-doubt, i.e. "why isn't this working?", just giving you the summary.

Re: Ask HN: Lead developer but I just don't enjoy management

#97
I quitted this week because of same reasons. I was working over 11 years in the hope growing of the company will let me do more jobs that I prefer (coding). When I was younger I was able to work longer and in the night to enyoy my work by coding. Nowadays, I don‘t want work 12 hours as manager and work nights for coding! I‘ve asked my boss several times to hire people for management and let me work as software developer, with no luck. The decision before I quit took too many years (waiting and waiting). Because the work and domain we are working is very interesting. Every task is a challenge to be solved, which made me happy to find solutions. Over the years, the ratio involved in coding decreased. Even I have quitted, I am still sad. I want work in this company even I have quitted. Now I am trying to adopt me to the new situation. I have no motivation to apply for new jobs. I think my quitting was too late. I hope I can find the motivation back again to start a new opportunity and work again.
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