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Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

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Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#91

Post by kennywinker »

f154hfds wrote: post #80
kennywinker wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> And there are few things more enriching for your child then getting involved in their education That’s a pleasing statement that seems true, but ignores the millions of ways that parents can be a bad influence. Over pressuring, taking away agency, just being bad study partners, biasing data as it arrives, etc etc etc. Everyone wants to believe they will be a good parent. But everyone will fuck it up in some way. On…

This is a signal vs. noise issue. Quite simply if you think your values are better than the average (and believe me - you do think this) then it makes sense to inculcate your values into your children as much as possible. A decision to not home educate your children is usually because of other considerations, usually financial, sometimes cultural, etc. I don't want to minimize your point about mental health though. I…

> If you're struggling you have to help yourself before you can pour into your children.

To be clear I think this applies to people who aren’t struggling, or don’t believe they are struggling. We all have a lifetime of accumulated damage. I hate the “therapy is for people with problems” idea. It’s not about struggling or not, it’s about repeating unhealthy patterns to a next generation - or the swinging pendulum of overcorrecting our parents mistakes. If you have or are going to have kids, please, do at least 6 sessions with a therapist you like. Worst case it does nothing, best case you save your self and your kids a lot of pain.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#92

Post by canjobear »

hprotagonist wrote: post #14

What stops me is that the socialization and peer-group relationship skills that are obtained rapidly in a public school context are not replicatable at home. Neither are the skills learned in dealing with non-family adults, independence of task skills away from home, and much else besides in that vein. I would rather -- and do -- support the public school system in my (medium sized) city.

What about this is specific to public as opposed to private schools?

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#93

Post by potta_coffee »

jakelazaroff wrote: post #52
mensetmanusman wrote: post #37

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It decreases the diversity of thought. If your school system is failing, the government shouldn’t imprison parents who want to do their best to try something else.

Not sure why "diversity of thought" is axiomatically a Good Thing. When extremely religious parents homeschool their children because they want to pass on those values, that's bad for society. Some things are heterodox for a reason.

You don't get to decide that religious values are good or bad.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#94

Post by voisin »

dyingkneepad wrote: post #30

Socialization. Going to school is not only about absorbing academical knowledge. It's about interacting with a broader group of people, learning how to behave, how to avoid common problems, etc. I would not be able to provide this to my kids. On top of that, the language we speak at home is not the language used by the school, or the rest of the country. There are a million problems that come with this: they would fo…

Socialization is important, on that we agree. Socialization at school is not always positive or even effective. There are many ways to socialize and jamming people of the same age in a room for 6-7 hours at a time is far less effective, in my opinion, than being part of extracurricular programs, clubs, etc that often mingle kids of different ages, backgrounds, neighbourhoods, and cultures far better than any school.

I found that school is an effective way for people to be pigeonholed with labels and expectations that make it more difficult for people to explore and change. Once labelled the class clown, or the athlete, or the brainiac, or whatever, it is very hard to do or try other things so long as you are in a fixed environment. This is why, in my opinion, going to college or university is such a profound life event for people - suddenly new environments and opportunities to explore being something other than your fixed adolescent self.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#95

Post by sofixa »

potta_coffee wrote: post #93
jakelazaroff wrote: post #52

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Not sure why "diversity of thought" is axiomatically a Good Thing. When extremely religious parents homeschool their children because they want to pass on those values, that's bad for society. Some things are heterodox for a reason.

You don't get to decide that religious values are good or bad.

As a citizen in a country, you get to decide on allowing religious fundamentalists to indoctrinate their children. I choose hell no, keep religion out of schools and out of public life.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#96

Post by yjftsjthsd-h »

na85 wrote: post #36
hprotagonist wrote: post #14

What stops me is that the socialization and peer-group relationship skills that are obtained rapidly in a public school context are not replicatable at home. Neither are the skills learned in dealing with non-family adults, independence of task skills away from home, and much else besides in that vein. I would rather -- and do -- support the public school system in my (medium sized) city.

I was a camp counselor for many years in my teens and into my twenties. We could always-- always --tell which kids were the homeschooled kids.

> We could always--always--tell which kids were the homeschooled kids.

With 100% accuracy in which direction? You noticed every homeschooled kid, or every kid you thought was homeschooled was actually homeschooled? Because those have very different implications.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#97

Post by voisin »

verisimilidude wrote: post #75
Turing_Machine wrote: post #67

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Because home schooled children never see anyone else at all? I think you'll find that is not actually the case. Also, I would argue that the distorted "society" produced by public schools is more harmful than beneficial.

Tell us where homeschooled kids get their socialization. Church? That's a bit like the pot calling the kettle black when it comes to social distortion. Homeschooled peer groups? There's no way that's a broader population than the school in 99.9% of homeschooling scenarios.

Swim lessons, camp, girl guides, soccer, art class, music lessons, part time jobs, church, etc etc etc etc etc. are you really so unimaginative as to believe that only school provides access to non-family members? Give your head a shake.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#98

Post by potta_coffee »

sofixa wrote: post #95
potta_coffee wrote: post #93

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You don't get to decide that religious values are good or bad.

As a citizen in a country, you get to decide on allowing religious fundamentalists to indoctrinate their children. I choose hell no , keep religion out of schools and out of public life.

You're using a lot of loaded language in your response. What is a "religious fundamentalist" to you? Also you're missing the point, because the topic of discussion is religious people educating their own kids, not religion in public schools.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#99

Post by mensetmanusman »

jakelazaroff wrote: post #52
mensetmanusman wrote: post #37

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It decreases the diversity of thought. If your school system is failing, the government shouldn’t imprison parents who want to do their best to try something else.

Not sure why "diversity of thought" is axiomatically a Good Thing. When extremely religious parents homeschool their children because they want to pass on those values, that's bad for society. Some things are heterodox for a reason.

Diversity of thought is important for creating a robust problem-solving framework. Once a monoculture forms it becomes easy to subvert it because people tend to be vulnerable in the same way.

e.g. a monoculture is easier to abuse by corrupt leaders. Increased diversity of thought may have prevented Germany from systematically becoming entirely reliant on Russia.

Re: Ask HN: If you’ve considered homeschooling, what’s stopping you?

#100

Post by mensetmanusman »

sofixa wrote: post #95
potta_coffee wrote: post #93

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You don't get to decide that religious values are good or bad.

As a citizen in a country, you get to decide on allowing religious fundamentalists to indoctrinate their children. I choose hell no , keep religion out of schools and out of public life.

This is an authoritarian mindset common on the left but is antithetical to liberal values. Having a desire to control how other people prefer to care for their children usually doesn’t end well historically.
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